bothered for a dollar // sei & billie

[Deleted]

✁ Billie unlearned what it meant to be comfortable.  The fight for her life began two years ago and Avriel won his, brought more money back home than she & Duke would ever know what to waste it on. He hasn't been quite the same since - she didn't expect him to be, but she watches as her brother lives in his head for the few months that he's home for. She reads his letters over twice, a third, just to make sure it's really him who wrote it but she can't be sure.  For once, things are supposed to be going right, unbelievably so. She's been here before; difference circumstance, same gut feeling. The second day her parents were missing she knew they weren't coming back, not in Panem.  Not with her luck.  And so before she met Ken, she'd come out after school and sell whatever she could get her hands on to afford soap and toothpaste. Avriel would work his odd ends to feed the three of them, and somehow she trusted the world more when it was just the three of them against it. It's hard to reintegrate, to make friends at the new prep school the wicked bitch from the capitol forced her in. It's hard to pretend she doesn't know what it's like to be a street rat, to be the trash kid kicked and spat at for trying to make it through.  Ken told her she couldn't work as a nurse anymore. She was too high profile, a collateral risk.  Somehow, in her seventeen year old brain, she felt lower than she ever had before. It was the first time in her life she'd been discarded by something close to family, a new pain she hid behind a clenched jaw. Ken kicked her out of the only work she had and Billie left her pride behind. "What?" But she would say, "Ken, that doesn't even make sense. You know I can do this and it's not like they're taking my goddamn ID. They won't even know-" "Just... stay in school. You don't need this anymore, you know that, right Billie?" "Please, I-"  "You need to leave. I have work to do."  Billie was holding onto a thread she hadn't even realized she grabbed ahold to, "c'mon!" She says, slamming her fist onto the counter she leaned on prior, "you know you need me, Ken, shit! What- what about Eon, huh? He would have bled out if I wasn't there!"  "You mean when you came back-" "Yeah!" "-with the supplies you stole?"   The conversation didn't last much longer. All the fight she had building up in her got caught in her throat -- Billie left without saying sorry. What she regrets more is she didn't leave empty handed. Something about old habits, Billie may have money but she hasn't learned how to trust that it'll stay.  She skips school to set up a booth down past the Victor Village, dragging a wagon of knick knacks, stolen goods and a single foldable table. All she's got in her wallet is change and 1's, all she's got on her mind is a bitter rage. To the world, to Ken, to herself. To whoever she can blame for an anger she doesn't understand; all she can concentrate on is getting rid of everything making her guilty.  Meds from Ken, books from school, movies she'd stuff one by one down her tank top from the corner store. Things from classmates - old and new, pots and a windchime she took from her neighbors' porches.  At this point, the only thing Billie can't sell is the lie that she doesn't care.

[kap]

"What a time to be alive
Such a waste of fucking time"

-----

"Kronos, I'm headed out!" I shouted upstairs as I started to get my shoes on. It was a school day, so I grabbed my backpack as well. When he didn't respond, I looked and realized his shoes were gone. He'd already headed out without saying anything, which wasn't unusual. He didn't do that in a rude or neglectful way. He typically only left without telling me if it was early in the morning, since he didn't want to bother me and wake me up. Usually he left a note when he did that, so I looked in the kitchen for a moment and saw one on the table.

Sei,
Headed out for a bit. Should be back by the time you get home. Have a good day at school.
-Kronos

I put the note back down on the table and tied my shoes. Heading out the front door, I started to head to school. As I was walking, though, I had second thoughts. Honestly, school had been hell lately. People hated River, so a lot of them hated me, even after the years that had passed since her time in the Games. I constantly told them that I was nothing like her, but they didn't care. After having seen her in the Games, they decided that I was just as bad.

Sure, there was the occasional person who admired her, but that was few and far between, and those weren't exactly the people I wanted to befriend, anyway.

So, the only friends I really had at school were those who didn't give a shit about my relation to River, and there were definitely not very many of them. That's why I made the decision not to go today. Kronos wouldn't know, and even if he did, I was sure he'd understand.

I turned around, starting off in the opposite direction of school. I just walked, not really knowing where I was headed until I ended up near the Victor's Village. There wasn't a whole lot going on near there, typically. Well, with the exception of people sort-of stalking the area looking for Avriel. I'd seen people do that from time to time. He was the first victor we'd had in years, so people wanted a good look at him. I didn't really understand the fascination with victors, but it was a thing nonetheless, I supposed.

As I wandered around the area, I eventually came across someone with a table set up, covered in a random assortment of items that appeared to be for sale. I decided to approach her table and look at what she had. Looking over the items, I didn't think too much of what she had, until I spotted something.

A watch, sitting on the table, looked awfully familiar. That was my watch. The one that had gone missing. Well, I suppose now I could consider it stolen. At first, I just looked at her and raised an eyebrow. I picked up the watch and looked it over. Yeah, it was definitely mine.

"Mind telling me where you got this?" I asked her, making eye contact.

I knew where she'd gotten it. She'd gotten it from me, but maybe it would give her a hint, because damn it, I wanted it back, and I wasn't planning on paying for it.

-----

lyrics: "So Called Life" by Three Days Grace

[Deleted]

✁ "Mind telling me where you got this?" She'd been keeping an eye on him since he first came to the table, shifty eye as he shifted through assorted goods. An older woman came and left with a nod, pockets empty but Billie smiled back for a brief second. Pop up merchants dot the street sides leading up to the Village, people always hope Colgate or Babe's grandkids would waste pocket gold on the way home; now she knows how annoying it is. Billie sits with her ankles crossed, fiddling with the cigarette carton out of boredom.  It's annoying because it works.  "I bought it," her eyes cut through him. She's never liked too many questions, maybe it's just the gang business in her blood. There's something about this boy that comes across familiar - it's a suspicious feeling. She'd know his name if it were a good thing, "from a thrifter," Billie lies, pointing somewhere south with an unlit cigarette between her fingers.  She's sure it's stolen, maybe from her old school? The cold air's rubbing her nose raw. There's no telling where she got half of this shit from, just the vague recollection at this point. Why'd you want to know? "You from Southbend?" She avoids pressing it- when you're dealing stolen goods it's best to focus on just getting rid of the thing. Doesn't take a genius to know that. Make eye contact, be direct, fudge the price if need be.  Rinse and repeat, really.  Billie flick, flick, flicks the lighter with the cigarette in between her lips. She's never been a smoker, but it's cold and she's bored and it's something to kill the awkward silence between convincing people to give her money. "The watch is 15, but," she looks him over between the smoke and fog, "maybe you can get a student discount or something."  He wants it, he can take it - she's getting the feeling it needs to go.

[kap]

"What a time to be alive
Such a waste of fucking time"

-----

She told me she bought the fucking watch. What a liar. I hated liars. They reminded me of my sister, and that was something I hated about her more than just about anything she had ever done, and there were a lot of things River had done that I'd hated.

The girl tried to change the subject, asking if I was from Southbend. I didn't answer her question. I looked at her with an eyebrow raised as she told me the price of the watch and mentioned something about a student discount.

"You didn't buy that." I told her this flatly. I wasn't happy. "You stole it. From me. I don't know how you got it from me, but you did. It went missing and now it's in with this shit you're selling."

I look at her sternly.

"Is all of this stuff stolen?"

My eyes scan the stuff on the table. It's definitely not brand new stuff. At least, not all of it. I wouldn't be surprised if most or even all of these items were stolen from other people.

"I feel like I recognize you, too. We've met before, I know that much. Must've been when you decided to steal my watch."

I was being very forward, but I wasn't afraid to be forward when I was angry.

-----

lyrics: "So Called Life" by Three Days Grace

[Deleted]

✁ Troubled spots trouble - like always, Billie should have listened to her gut. Go for the eyes, flip the table and run, throw a fist, spit at him; something. She's always had more fight than flight, but as he begins accusing her of the truth she finds herself grounded and frozen. There isn't an urge to fight, her knuckles don't pound eagerly in anticipation, instead she feels an inkling of fear in the fact that she doesn't know what he will do.  "None of it is stolen!" Billie doubles down, slamming her hands on the sells table. She didn't keep tabs on where most of this came from, just that it wound up in her pockets at some point. And that means it's her's, and therefore not stolen if you really think of it. That's how she choses to, at least.  This was supposed to be easy money anyways, what's the odds someone actually recognized one of their things in the midst of her thing's? "Look dude, you better be careful of who you accuse of being a thief around here. Just take the watch, and the advice, and go." Don't even need that watch anyways!  Keep it moving, folks.