how to disappear 🧨 dantat

[Deleted]

🧨

Yeah, the Capitol is cool or whatever. 

Honestly I've been bored as shit. I agreed to come with grandpa because I thought, you know, the Capitol would have something crazy going on. Instead, all I do is watch the window for fireworks and lightshows while my grandpa watches television like a pacified tablet baby. 

That changes tonight though. I've hardly left the hotel room since we've got here, and I was itching to get out there and see what dumb bullshit is happening around me. So, I left. Grabbed my vape and my purse and dipped once Gramps knocked out watching this nature documentary. It's almost all he watches these days - it could be worse really. Plus, it gave me a really stupid idea. 

It's kind of a coincidence that Dante and I both wound up in the Cap. Once my grandpa got through the first round and everything calmed down, I gave her a call and the bitch was staying at a hotel not even two blocks down from me. Stupid apple doesn't go far from the stupid tree or whatever the saying is. She's a +1 for this guy Derek and I'm like, yeah, let's ditch him! 

And so I rang her again an hour ago telling her to get ready, we've got shit to do. I even said she could bring the guy but he didn't want to come - don't say I didn't try.  

So we're supposed to meet up at this train station, but I hate how many people are in this subway. There's gutter water in the tiles and some guy is sleeping in it, there's conjoined twins playing a fucking lute while a kobold dances and I feel like I'm tweaking. This guy has tentacles on his head, what's up with that? I didn't sign up to get ringworms with some weirdos, so I took my ass back up top to wait for Dante on the street. 

I squint and watch this crusty lady let her pitfall lizard lick her teeth clean. 

Hate it here, bro. 

[fox]

D A N T A L I O N

► ► ►

Derek told me he was gonna audition for PGT and I was like okay? with what talent.

Turns out being pretty is a talent. Fuck me.

It's like so embarrassing. He went through his whole routine in my room and I told him to just concede to Tommy or Jasper or whoever the fuck put him up to this.

But then – I realized they're gonna need friends or family there backstage to pan to for the backstory. Free vacation, you know? So I go along with it. It's fine, I'll just have to pretend I don't know this man for the rest of my life in public and I already do that half the time.

I wanted to see what the Capitol's all about.

And it's honestly just alright.

The way they make it sound, I expected rivers of champagne and sexy people everywhere, but it's kind of just like billboards and finance bros. Turns out people do have jobs here. Turns out they work nine-to-fives and the traffic's horrendous in the mornings. The hotel food is overrated. I'm tired of gold leaf in everything, I kinda just want a fucking taco.

I tried calling Tat but no one was home. So imagine my surprise when I see her grandpa doing old people shit on the PGT stage. And here I was thinking it couldn't get any worse than your friend flexing for all of Panem. She rings me up the next day and she's literally across the street.

She calls again after auditions and tells me we're bouncing. I drag myself out of bed from watching reruns of YLIP and the gratuitous number of zoom-ins on Axel Morrisen's face. I ask Derek if he wants to come but he's busy wooing the babes of the Capitol or something. Apparently being hot does get you far in life because he somehow made it through.

Tat's standing next to the underground entrance. A car tries to mow me over as I cross the street, honking like an idiot, even though the sign clearly says yield to pedestrians. Run me over, I guess.

"Hey! Missed you, bitch. What are we doing?"

[Deleted]

🧨

"Hey!"

"Ugh, finally!

"Missed you bitch," aww? Don't get sappy on me now. I meet her with a hug, mostly because it's nice to have at least one sane person with me here. "What are we doing?" 

"Standing on the street," I say, blank faced. She looks at me stupid and I can't blame her until I start laughing at how unfunny I am. I take a second bag out of mine and toss it at her, "so I've got a game plan here, but first we got to take the monorail out of the Neon District." Which like, I think that's where we are? I got a brochure that shoots out a hologram with notable locations near me but no where on here does it say what district I'm in. 

Who designed this thing anyways? 

Walk and talk, babe. Pushing past weirdo's as we go back down into the subway, I try to pin down which station we need to wait at. "I'm so good at reading maps, I should be like, an explorer," I could find district 13 at this rate. Hell, I could find District 14. "Oh, so anyways, we're going to break into the Quartz Zoo and steal the coolest mutt that'll fit in that bag." I say, pointing at the one I threw at her back on the street. 

"Oh cool, that's our rail!" Woah, didn't realize how fast a Capitol monorail went until now I guess. That's pretty neat, some dude's frohawk nearly stabs my eye out - I'll just be blind, that's okay. "Is it just me or are the people here even freakier than they show on tv?"

[fox]

D A N T A L I O N

► ► ►

Tat laughs like a maniac a second later and it takes everything to not roll my eyes. She throws me a bag that I barely catch and starts walking to the underground. I thought the Capitol would've invented teleportation at this point – they literally turned the tributes into werewolves and vampires this year, like, they have the budget. Dad's always watching the games harping about how it's a waste of taxpayer dollars.

Vampire Jack Price was hot as fuck though.

Instead, we push past the bros in wingtip shoes and the lute players, and halfway into the tunnel, she goes "Oh, so anyways, we're going to break into the Quartz Zoo and steal the coolest mutt that'll fit in that bag."

Sometimes I forget how utterly unhinged she is.

It's kinda like she's the main character. I mean that in a good way. Like somehow she never gets into trouble with all the stuff she does. And she just does shit. All the time.

The first time I ever held a vape? With Tat in the second floor girl's bathroom.

Like I didn't actually vape but I held it.

I guess I mean I was dying of boredom when I met her. Sitting in third period, it felt like I was made of the bubble gum underneath desks and the birthday paraphernalia in my closet that said I was getting older but I never felt like I was. So it's good and it's great and also she's insane.

"Oh my god. I can't get arrested. My parents would ground me forever."

But the train comes, wind sweeping through the station. The doors slide open and that bitch just hops on. "Tatton, no for real, going to jail is so unsexy."

But then the doors chime, and the robot voice comes on to tell us to please stand clear of the doors, and suddenly I'm on the rail, a man with frohawk holding the bar between us. I'm trying to speak over his shoulder but I do a double-take at a girl who takes out a cutting board from her bag and starts making a breakfast bagel.

Well shit.

I turn back to Tat. "How are we even going to get past security?"

[Deleted]

🧨

"Tatton, no for real, going to jail is so unsexy."

"Speak for yourself," fuck that I look great in a jump suit, and that's where the deranged men are aka my type. It's the year of 92, soft boys are out and threatening men are in, if I'm not putting my life on the line every time I see him, what's the point? I don't need protection, I need hand to hand combat in the bedroom. "Remember Anarchy and Cedric? Total jailbirds, tell me that's not worth a little stain on your record," sarcasm dripping out of me and onto these hoes like I'm a window a/c unit. 

Now, don't get the wrong idea here, Dante's usually a ride or die but I get the concern. It's like, borderline treason for us to be here in the first place but you're only 16 for a few years, right? Make the best out of it, lemonade out of lemons and all that, our life expectancy caps at 18 so I might as well fuck up a few more times before then. 

The monorail doors squeal open and I turn to look at my good sis, behind her's a guy with three eyes and I'm trying to figure out if it's real or not without staring. How do you even do that? Kinda sick though, we could always do that instead. Find a prosthetics shop and walk away from here with a few extra limbs, I've always wanted to be an abomination. Think it'd be funny, my mom would love it that bitch. "How are we even going to get past security?" 

"Oh, trust, I came with a battle plan," I reassure her, as if I'm the master of good ideas or something. 

Think my track record is like 1-63 when it comes to good ideas, can't help being so talented, y'know? "I've got this POLA mutual, a chick on the inside if you will, total babe," you'd love her, honestly, "that's right, I got connections, biyatch." I get in Dante's face when I say it, gloating with a grin before pushing through the dude in front of us to get on the monorail. There's a second where I'm just standing there waiting for Dante, skirting to move out the way so more Cap'o'freaks can board. 

Should I bribe her with a blinky? My cart's almost dead but there might be a hit or two left, "c'mon, don't make me wind up on DetentionBaddies alone!"