cygnus putley, district seven

Dear Diary,

I think there's something wrong with me.

Everyone leaves me. My mom. My dad. Alaska. I think I might have to run away or something because that way I won't get close to anyone. No one can hurt me. I can go from district-to-district. My dad wouldn't care, Alaska was always his favorite. If When Alaska wins, I'll come back. That's greedy, I know, but Alaska is the only person who I think I love enough to die for, and she is will might do the same for me.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

My dad moved back in the day after the reaping. He's been treating be all special like I'm the one being sent to die. It sucks that he chose now to show his affection. It doesn't matter.

He also told me something I really didn't want to hear. I cried the whole night and I thought Alaska was so lucky because she is going to die. I cried even more when I realized that.

(Spoiler: my dad is marrying some slut.)

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

I watched Alaska's interview last night.

She's fearless. She's cunning and fierce, and I would be humiliated right now if I knew these won't be the last words I hear from her mouth. Alaska Putley's mouth. The one I know. She mentioned me in her interview. She says that she's going to try to win for me but she knows she can't. I was going to not cry tonight. To be strong for her. Obviously, that's a lie.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

Alaska is still alive. She survived the Bloodbath. From the looks of it, she's alone, but I don't like watching anyways. I hate the feeling I get when I notice she's slightly close to another tribute. I don't want her to die. She can't.

My dad got married TODAY. He said they've been dating for a while, but I don't think it matters. The only thing I know about this later is that her husband died of smoking and most of her children are annoying.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

Things are looking good for Alaska.

She's allied with the boy from Seven and the crippled kid from Eight. They fought some mutts earlier but now they're fine. Alaska's kind of lucky because the arena she's in is really creative. It's pretty. It has an upper and lower level connected by a cavern.

I hope she passes away somewhere pretty.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

Last night, Alaska found camp at some other alliance. The girl from Two didn't really want her to join. When the girl from Two threatened Alaska, Tanaina snorted, and I could hear her talking to herself. "If I were her, Alaska's head would be on a stick already." I would have smacked her upside the head if her mom wasn't right there.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

I was planning on giving this to Alaska but I guess I can't anymore.

Good night.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

Alaska's body came to us today. The pyramid bracelet I gave her for her token is still secured on her wrist. I don't want to take it off. I don't want to look at it. I don't want to live anymore.

Help me.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

Alaska is now officially six feet under. Her funeral was today and I talked at it. "Alaska was a good sister." I started crying too much and I couldn't say anything else. Other people said how strong she was, how no one could knock her down. I cried again and I left. I don't really regret missing the last few minutes of her funeral because after the funeral I came back with my dad and we just stood there for a few hours. I cried and he comforted. After a while, we switched roles.

I don't know if he was crying for Alaska or Mom.

Probably both.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

I want to die.

I haven't aten in a while. I've been so good, I've been eating every meal. Now, whenever I look at food I cringe. I play with it on my plate and just leave it.

I miss Alaska.

I miss her smell and her bitchiness and our fights. I miss the way she'd always cook me eggs and bacon even though she knew I wasn't going to eat it. I love the way she insisted I was innocent when I was far from it.

I don't miss school. My dad hasn't sent me because it'd be too hard and he's right. Everyone would give me pity and that's the last thing I want.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

People are starting to say I look like Alaska and I'm getting sick of it. I want to forget about her, but it's hard when I am her. I stare at myself in my mirror and agree. I have straw brown hair and huge brown eyes. We have prominent collarbones and sloping shoulders. I'm a bit shorter, but she's a bit older. I have larger breasts, but I don't think she cared about that. I know I have fatter fingers because whenever we would hold hands she would say they looked like sausages and I'd say her hands looked like chopsticks. My feet are the same way.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

I found Alaska's poetry books, and inside of them were some poems she wrote. I think I could get into the whole poetry thing. For her. For Alaska. I think she'd like that.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

I can't hold onto you any longer. You helped a lot in the past month or two, but you hold too many memories and I need to let go of them. Tomorrow, I'm going to light you on fire. Thank you. I really needed you.

Cygnus

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Dear Diary,

Good bye.

Cygnus

odair
Laura Love
Ballerina