Fawn Jay District 9 Done

Your eyes dart around the table to see if anyone else at the table is looking before taking Jabbers hand under the table. He meets your gaze with a small smile, understanding completely. It’s been three years since your cousin moved in with your family and the two of you have become very close, probably closer than you really should be, considering you guys are cousins and all but you can’t help it. You are in love with him and you know that he feels the same way for you. Sometimes I wish we weren’t cousins this is the thought that constantly plays through your mind. You look down at the tiny meal in front of you and feel a smile play at the corners of your full lips. It may be small but it’s full of vitamins and minerals. A bit of meat for protein, some potatoes, and miscellaneous vegetables for vitamins that you need. There is also a small glass of water to wash all of it down. You enjoy the meal slowly, letting every bit of flavour fill your mouth before swallowing. Once you are done, you’re still hungry but you won’t ask for more because there isn’t more, even though your parents work hard every day to bring in enough for the eight of you if you include yourself. Your family is missing a few people at the moment; Mocking probably off doing something dangerous with his friends and Stellar probably studying at the request of your mother Gray. You wish everyone could be at the table for dinner but you know it’s hard for everyone to be there.

You take a bath in the huge tub but the water isn’t very hot. In fact, it’s quite cool, the result of having sat for too long while you got ready. You dunk your head, washing your strawberry blonde hair before getting out of the tub. You sing while you get dressed, although your voice stays soft so that no one hears you, and continue to sing as you comb through your tangled hair and braid it back. You leave the bathroom and go into the bedroom you share with your youngest sister Violet, who’s twelve, and smile when you see her studying for school. ”Need some help?” you ask, sitting down at the desk beside her. She looks up at you and nods. ”Yes please” her voice is sweet, it’s a shame she doesn’t like to sing. You look at the worksheet she’s working on and groan, it’s math, you are terrible at math. Ugh, I hate math You attempt to help her but it quickly becomes clear that you have no idea what you’re doing. ”Yeah, I think I’ll ask Stellar” Violet says after a few minutes of your failed attempts. You nod. ”That’s probably a good idea, I’m sorry I couldn’t help more” you say, sighing as she leaves the room in search of your oldest brother who’s a whiz at these sorts of things. You stand up and walk over to your bed, feeling grateful for the matrass under you because not everyone in the district has one. Your voice rings out as you sing a sad song about a girl who went up to the mountain to meet her lover but when she got there, he was nowhere to be found. You hear someone stop in front of the door and stop singing, not wanting anyone to hear your voice. You’re incredibly shy about these things. The person behind the door knocks and cracks open the door. ”Fawn, it’s me” you recognize the voice instantly, it’s Jabber. ”Come in Jab,” you call. He opens the door all the way and comes into the room, crossing the room to lie beside you. You roll over so that you can look at him and he smiles. ”You know I love your singing, why’d you stop” he asks. You blush ”You know how nervous I get when others hear me sing” you reply. He nods. ”sing for me please” he insists. You smile and sit up, starting to sing. Jabber smiles as you continue to sing.

Before Jabber came to live with your family in your tiny, five bedroom house, he’d lived with his parents. Unfortunately, they died in an accident. The two of you had always been close but him moving in has brought the two of you even closer. You look at one of your brothers, Red, who happens to be blind, and frown. You knew he was an angry child and was prone to angry outbursts. He looks at you with his sightless eyes and frowns, as if he can see you. You turn away and run right into your father, Blue. He`s a bit of a pack rat, using the biggest bedroom for his shoeboxes full of random stuff. What the hell is he thinking? You have no idea but you do know that it drives your mom crazy because it only leaves 4 rooms for 10 people. What is my father thinking? You smile up at him and he grins back. ”Hello, my little deer, how are you?” he asks. You smile. ”I’m good, how are you?” you reply. ”I’m excellent, although your mother is a little mad at me because I’ve added another shoebox to my collections” he says, grinning sheepishly. You giggle, stepping around him. ”Off to do something with Jabber I assume?” he asks. Your father is one of the few people in the family who knows about your relationship with Jabber and he seems to be fine with it. You nod, starting to walk away. ”have fun but be safe” he calls after you. You nod and continue on your way

A soft cry escapes your lips as Jabber Tasers you in the sides. ”Jab, don’t do that, you know how freaking ticklish I am” you cry, turning around to look at him. He smiles down at you and you feel your heart flutter. ”You know, we really shouldn’t be doing this, Jab, we’re cousins” you say. He frowns and you instantly regret having said anything. ”Do you want this between us?” he asks in your ear. You look up at him, your pretty gray eyes shining. ”I do but I don’t want us to get in trouble” You reply. ”What are they gonna do if they catch us?” he has a point and you know it. ”I guess nothing” you reply, hugging him. He wraps his arms around you and you rest your head against his chest. ”I love you Fawn and there’s nothing anybody can do to make that stop” he says softly. You look up at him, a blush coloring your cheeks as you see the intensity of his gaze. ”I love you too Jab” you say, smiling up at him. He’s a whole head taller than your five foot six inch frame so you have to crane your head to look up at him. You stand there like that for a while

Times are tough for your big family, your parents are working but little money is coming in. Many nights, you’ve laid awake looking up at the ceiling and worrying about the family getting evicted from the house. You’d be out on the streets with no roof over your head. You don’t want that at all so you decide it’s time for you to look for a job. You begin your search at the factories of your district and get hired doing inventory; basically, you get to count things all day and get paid $10.75 an hour, a good income for sitting and doing nothing but within the first few days, you are so sick of counting that you ask the manager for another position. ”because you’re cute, I’ll promote you to assistant manager” he says. You beam at the manager and walk away, feeling satisfied. The money you’re bringing in is helping the family a lot and you love it because it means you’ll be able to stay in your home, the downside though is that you rarely get to see Jabber now and when you do, normally you’re really tired. He seems to understand but you can tell that he wants to see you more. On weekends, you spend every minute you can with him but it’s never enough time. At the moment, you lie on your back on your bed with your eyes closed. You’re exhausted from work and your back is killing you. Jabber knocks on the door. ”Fawn, can I come in?” he asks. Violet looks at you for a moment before leaving the room to let the two of you have some alone time. ”Come on in Jab” you say. He opens the door and crosses the room to lie down beside you. ”My back is killing me, all the standing and walking and everything has tired me right out” you say. He looks at you with concern before rolling you onto your stomach. ”I’ll give you a massage” he says. You close your eyes as he messages your back, getting out all the soreness in your back. ”Thank you, Jab, I needed that” you say, smiling.

Tears fall down your face as you look at Jabber. He is covered in blood from an injury to his chest.. ”Oh my god Jabber” you cry, running to him. He’s deathly pale as you hug him tightly. ”It’s just a small cut, don’t worry Fawn” he says faintly. You call for help and Mist, your second youngest sister, goes for help with her twin, Storm, at her heels. ”It’s gonna be okay Jab, I promise” you say softly. He takes your hand and squeezes it tightly. When help comes, you keep your hand in his as he’s transported to the healer’s home. The bleeding from his cut has slowed to a steady trickle of blood and fear twists your gut as you look at him. He’s gonna be okay, he’s gonna be okay you tell yourself, hoping to whoever is listening that it’s true.

Hours later, you sit in the waiting room while the healers look after Jabber. You’re so worried about him that you can’t focus. You find yourself pacing and worry claws at your stomach. Please be alright you pray. Finally, the healers assistant, Maria, comes out and tells you that you can see him now. You almost run into the room but restrain yourself. When you enter, you see Jabber lying on a cot, his chest bare, neat stitches criss-crossing the chest, and go to his side. He’s awake but not completely aware of what’s going on. ”Fawn, is that you?” he asks, searching for your hand. You take his hand in yours and squeeze. ”It’s me Jab, how are you feeling?” you ask. He grunts. ”Like I’ve lost too much blood” he says with a ghost of a smile. You smile softly, feeling relief flood you as you just sit there in silence. You were so worried about him, you thought he wouldn’t make it.

It takes a few weeks, but Jabber finally recovers from his wound. He looks down at you as you embrace him tightly, loving the warmth of his arms. The two of you are alone finally, no one would freaking leave Jabber alone until now. He holds you close as you rest your head against his chest. You know that you shouldn’t feel this way about your cousin but you can’t help it. You’ve given up trying to fight it because you know that you won’t be able to, no matter how hard you try. These feelings for Jabber are too strong for you to deny. You look up at him as he puts his hand under your chin and forces you softly to look up. ”I’ve told you I love you right?” he asks. You nod and smile, feeling your heart race at the closeness between the two of you. He runs a hand through your hair and leans down, pressing his lips against yours. It’s your first kiss. You enjoy it for a few moments before pulling back. ”We shouldn’t” you say, looking into his eyes. ”I’m tired of trying to fight, I can’t fight it. We’ll just keep it low key okay” he says softly. You give him a small smile and he kisses you again. This time, less hesitant. You savour it until you hear the door open and you break apart. Act as if nothing happened you say with your eyes. He nods and you both turn to the person who’s entered.

Notes
Codeword odair