Lovrina Mae Dean District 1 FINISHED

Awesome, you want to talk about me, that's my favorite subject to talk about. Seriously I'm not bragging or anything, and I don't love myself...okay I do...but that's besides the point. Where do I start though, oh yeah, with my appearance of course, it's always good to get an idea of what someone looks like. Honestly my looks don't really mean that much to me, but you know, I won't hesitate to talk about them. I'm tall for a girl, and only a girl of sixteen, standing at about 5'11", oh yeah feel sorry for yourselves ladies. This is only the beginning though, prepare yourself for the awesomeness that is Lovrina.

My hair, oh my gosh, my hair is one of my favorite things about me. It's blonde with brown streaks that run through it, and it's so incredibly short, alot of people mistake me for a boy. I like it that way though, I've always wanted to be one of the guys. That's why I got this hair cut in the first place, because I thought it would help me fit in better with the guys. Besides that, it's cute, and I love it alot, just had that bonus of helping me feel like I fit in better. Makes me feel like I accept myself better also, long hair...isn't me.

I'm a big fan of bangs so there isn't much to talk about until you get to my eyes. They are a deep blue, like seriously you could probably drown in them, the pigment in my eyes is so very strong that you can even see it at night. Of course this comes at a cost, whether because of that or another reason, I have issues looking directly at any light. This really wasn't an issue for me when I was younger and I had long hair, but well now, you already know about my hair. This causes some problems though, so it's not uncommon to see with with sunglasses when I go out. I bet you're wondering how people see my eyes am I right, well here's the trick. I have a pair of contacts that I wear that reduces the amount of light gets into my eyes, yay for science.

Enough about that though let's cover the rest of my face, after all there is more to a person than just their eyes. Hmmm, my nose, well it's small and really undefined, it's really the only thing I hate about my looks. I wish it were just a little bit bigger and had more shape to it, like seriously, it's almost flat against my face and it's so tiny. Let's move onto my lips, they're much better to talk about, so plump and beautiful. My eyes and my moth always show what I'm thinking, mostly my mouth though. It tends to reflect how I'm feeling on the inside, happy, sad, angry, worried, it covers every emotion. I like my lips so much that I often make kissy faces in the mirror just because it makes me look so cute and flirty.

Like I said I'm tall for a girl, I tower over all of them, and I like it that way. Makes me feel powerful, especially since I'm taller than most guys too. I'm thin though so it makes it kind of awkward at times. You would think being in a wealthier district that I would be a little bit, well, bulkier. I can't hold down food though, at least not like normal people can. Truth is I'm kind of anorexic, the food gets in me and my body won't hold it down. It will just get rid of it...just like that...poof. Though the poof can get kinda messy. As a result I'm not all that curvy, though I don't mind at all. I don't really want to be all that curvy, because than I would attract the attention of to many boys, and I don't want that.

Let's talk fashion now, I like boys clothes, or at least clothes that look like boys clothes. My dad likes to think I'm still his little girl and every now and again I'll be found in a dress and bows, and it's gross, just gross. Give me a pair of jeans any day, a pair of jeans and a non frilly shirt, frills make me sick. Unless they're on someone else, in which case I like them, for me though...ugh, won't happen. I feel like I'm forgetting something though, something important. Ah, that's right a flaw, well I already told you about my anorexia, and on top of that I have an acne problem on my back. Sure, it's not all that much, but what do you want from me? Not everyone has scars and burns or some other terrible affliction.

My personality now...I can sum it up in only a few words, but I'm guessing that wouldn't work with you. So, I guess I'll draw it out for you, go into some detail. Let's just hope I can, detail isn't something I look at alot. Alright here we go, I'm pretty upbeat, it takes alot to bring me down, like even someone dying won't bring me down. I find something good about whatever situation I find myself in because who wants to go through life being sad and depressed. LiFe is to short to go through it living with a dark cloud around you, be happy...like me.

Let's see, oh I know, I'm outgoing and super friendly I love everyone and think everyone is my friend. I'll run up to someone and start talking to them as if I've known them for years and they're my best friend. This may or may not be a good thing though because going by that I have alot of "friends", but I haven't the slightest idea who they are or if I'll ever see them again. Maybe it's because I'm an only child so I want to have lots of friends and want everyone to love me. Not that it makes a difference to me if they love me or not, just so long as they've seen me in their lives is fine. I only want one person to love me, and that's the person(girl) that I choose to be with. Yeah, I like girls it's true, just another disappointment to dad who wanted a little princess. Instead he got a princess who wants to be a prince.

See that's part of the reason I want to be like one of the guys, maybe that way I'll get the attention of some pretty girls. A silly notion of course, but I'm a silly girl so why not have a few silly notions. I'm alot more silly than that in all honesty, I make up alot of things to make me feel smart. I'm not the sharpest sword in District 1, I'd even go so far as to say I'm as ditzy and dumb as they get. Like I can do simple stuff and I know about Panem, you know all the important stuff, but I don't register information well. That's one of my flaws actually, no matter how hard I try I can't figure some things out. The information won't stick in my head, I'd tell you the official name of the disease, but I can't remember it. Something like anterograde amnesia, I can't really remember though, not that I could ever remember much to begin with.

I can remember faces, but I have trouble remembering the name that goes with it. In reality I just have a problem remembering everything. Like they come in bursts here and there and I'll remember stuff and than...poof...they're gone. Maybe that's why I want friends so much, because I can never remember the ones I had. Is it sad the only people I remember in my life are my parents? I can't even remember my old friends or really anyone. I can't let it keep me down though, take each day in stride. Not like I can dwell on what was, because I can't remember what was.

I suppose now I'm a little more reserved than I used to be, a little more caught up in my mind, or what's left of it rather. Like occasionally I'll stop whatever I'm doing and stare off into space trying to remember something. Even though I'm still a happy girl I do have moments of sadness. They hit me suddenly and I don't know why, maybe a memory that I cannot see causing it. All of this is why I run up to people acting like I've known them forever. It's the hope that if I act like I've known them, maybe just maybe I'll remember if I did. It's a vain hope, one that only serves to bring me down if I think about it. That's about all I can remember about my personality, so take it or leave it, if I remember anymore I'll let you know.

Well my life started out just like everyone elses, I was born into the "wonderful" world of Panem to my parents. Despite the enormous wealth we had I always found it frivelous and wasteful to spend it all just because we had it. Sure, I had tons of toys as I grew up, I was an only child sue me, but I never had an excess. Though I was different from most of the girls in the district. While they played with their dolls and dresses I would be found with a sword and some armor. I never wanted to play with the other girls, instead I prefered to rough house with the boys, play fight and stuff.

My dad was kind of disappointed by it, I wasn't daddy's little girl like he wanted. Instead I was a tomboy who didn't like to be girly and frilly, I liked to have a pair of jeans on and a breast plate. Occasionally to make dad happy I would get into a dress for him, and put a bow in my hair, but I hated doing it. Eventually I cut my hair so I would have some excuse to not put bows in my hair. Anyways though I loved to fight, all day every day I would fight in the facilities. I wouldn't fight the girls, I would fight the boys all of the really strong boys that thought they were great.

It was during one such fights that I suffered a serious injury. Well not serious as in bloody with scars and stuff, but serious in that I lost my memories. I got hit in the head with the hilt of the sword, and was knocked out cold. When I awoke I couldn't remember anything. At first my friends thought I was faking it or something, but when I asked if someone could take me home because I didn't know where I livedthey actually took it seriously. I couldn't remember anything at all until I got home and saw my parents. Sadly the only thing I remembered was them, my friends, my life before the accident...all gone. I had to hurry just to tell you what I do know about my history before I forgot it. See, my memories come in short bursts, I'll remember them for a little while, but than quickly forget them.

We've tried so many ways to get me to remember things, from writing things down to taking pictures of everything. None of it seems to work though, the doctors told me I'm a hopeless case, and I'll probably never remember anything like I used to. The closes we've ever come to getting me to remember things is giving me a camera that I take everywhere with me. I'll take pictures of everything I see, people and places, and I'll put them in a small binder. They'll get a tag on them naming the person and place, and whenever I can't remember something I can go into the binder and try and trigger a memory.

When people used to say a picture was worth a thousand words and that they can make a memory they probably had no idea how true it was. All of those pictures literally are "my" memories. Even if I don't remember all the details or anything I take heart in knowing that I DID know the places and people captured by my camera. It's a sad existence I know, but I've got to try and make the best of it right? I can't allow myself to always be in despair otherwise what's the point of living. Life is to short, especially to me because I can't remember my life.

My life continued on though, some days I would remember people some days I didn't. In any event here I am today, the only memories of my past that I still possess are the ones that made me what I was. I didn't forget who I was as a person, what made me special. Alot of people sympathize with my memory problems, trying ot help me remember things and the like. I know I probably wouldn't be as patient as they are were I in their position, so I can only thank them for being so kind.

This presented another problem though, I really couldn't remember much about fighting, so I had to start from scratch. Where once I was on top of the world I was now at the bottom, day in and day out trying to remember the drills that we went through. It's s hopeless cause though, if I ever get reaped I'll be dead meat because I won't be able to remember a thing. Well that's about it, covers everything that's of any importance, at least everything I can remember. Thanks for taking the time to get to know me, I really appreciate it.

The full name of the disease she has is called Retrograde and Anterograde Amnesia. She has memories, but she only gets them in short bursts, and quickly forgets them. All the events before the accident are lost to her unless they appear in a brief memory.