Skeletons In The Closet

[Artemis]

The work slowly becomes more and more quiet as Brody made trips up and down the ladder for more shingles, while Matthew laid them in neat rows and tossed the old ones to the ground where they scattered pieces all over. Under the heat of the day, Brody felt like he was baking against the clay tiles; only self-consciousness at his scars kept him from following Matthew's lead and discarding his shirt. It had completely ruined the friendly atmosphere last time, and Brody had no desire to relive it.

"Ah, shit." Matthew swore suddenly, after maybe an hour of silent work.

"What's wrong?"

"I should have gotten more."

Brody sighed, sitting on the swatch of carpet they'd been kneeling on to lay the shingles; it was the only surface up on the roof that was cool enough to do so, though it was a bit of a tight fit for both men to share. Matthew wiped his forehead, leaving a streak of dirt behind as he handed Brody his water bottle with the other.

"Hydrate, buddy."

He didn't question it, just did as Matthew instructed; it was a relief, to be honest, not to have to do anything accept follow directions and not use his head for a while. The repetitive motion of helping Matthew lay the new roof was oddly calming, and if it weren't so goddamned hot up here, he'd be sorry it was finished. By now his t-shirt had soaked through with sweat, and when Brody ran a hand over his sweat-dampened hair, it stuck up at odd angles.

"How good are you with pipes?"

Brody turned to raise an eyebrow at Matthew, though he hesitated to respond as his friend poured some of his water bottle over his head. At this point, he wasn't quite sure if Matthew was trying to goad him into another game of Gay Chicken, or if he honestly didn't know what an effect his (prolonged) shirtlessness was having on him. Brody was trying very, very diligently not to stare, knowing full well that if this wasn't another round to the game that Matthew was oddly squeamish of Brody's bisexuality, but Matthew's state of undress and pouring water over his sweat-slicked, now-tan skin was doing Brody's willpower no favors.

"Fuck if I know." He replied, mentally hoping he hadn't taken too long to reply, "'Handyman' was always more Dad's thing than mine."

ffffff - Brody O'Rourke
1979 - Matthew Dunham

[Jack Lexington]

For a moment I close my eyes because of the water running into them, then wipe my hand over them and look at Brody for his answer but catch him staring. Why is he looking at me that way?
Oh shit. Once again I did what i would do when I'm alone and forgot about his bisexuality. Although I'm sure he has no interest in me whatsoever that look does make me feel a little squeamish. Not that his interest wouldn't be flattering but I'm simply not sure what I would do if he actually was getting the hots for me.

I look away as quickly as he does now and pull the shirt out of the back of my pants. It's party wet now but will probably make us both feel a little less strange, now that I think I have caught on.
The white fabric quickly gets pulled over my head and pull up the rim of my pants a bit while he declares.
"Fuck if I know. 'Handyman' was always more Dad's thing than mine."
"Well,..." Good thing I don't have a tendency to studder under pressure.
"We'll find out how well you can handle them."

I get up, brush my wet palms on the fabric of my shirt and descend the ladder.

Once I'm down I look up at him. There's a moment when I actually check him out. His body, his face, his ass...and wonder whether I'd have it in me to swing both ways as well.

His presence and the fact that my role is completely changing at the moment makes me question all kinds of things. Change can be good or bad, right?

That's when I stare . At least until he's down on the ground as well and we round the house to the back. Inside it's almost as hot as outside but it's also dusty and dirty because half of the wall has already been hammered down to get to the old piping. On the ground is a puddle of grime.
"Back here I have a rusty old leaking pipe. That needs to comeout of the wall and be replaced."
I motion for the hammer.
"Hammer or axe?"

[Artemis]

Well, that settled that train of thought; Brody resisted the urge to roll his eyes when Matthew quickly looked away, deciding now was a good time to finally put his t-shirt back on and tug his pants up. Apparently, this wasn't another game of chicken.

"Well," Matthew trailed off lamely, "We'll find out how well you can handle them."

Matthew descended the ladder first, and Brody couldn't help but smirk to himself and shake his head when his friend wasn't looking; Brody had no idea what his deal was with the idea of other males finding him attractive, and at times it was exasperating, but the fact that Matthew almost seemed like an awkward teenager about the subject made it the smallest bit entertaining. Of course, he had the nagging suspicion it had something to do with Mr. Dunham's methods of rearing his son; Nolan had made it clear early on that he didn't much care about the gender of the person Brody brought home as long as they treated him right.

He couldn't see it, climbing down the ladder next, but Brody could feel his friend's eyes on him; the amused mood in him dimmed a bit, realizing what a mess he was right now. Brody had still only regained a little of his muscle tone through physical therapy and easing back into his workout routine, but he had a long way to go to get back to his muscular, Peacekeeper-esque stature; to say nothing of the hair-trigger episodes and Matthew's well-voiced opinion about some of the Peacekeepers' methods.

It would seem, though, that Matthew's apparent curiosity outweighed that particular opinion as he was openly staring when Brody hopped the last two rungs to the ground.

"Lead the way."

It was hardly a relief to be back inside the house, which was almost as hot as the outside, and the air was bone-dry with sun-lit particles floating in the air; the gaping hole in one of the walls was probably the source. There was a dark puddle of sludge forming at the base of the pipe, which was nearly green with oxidation.

"Back here I have a rusty old leaking pipe. That needs to come out of the wall and be replaced." Matthew gestured towards the tools piled near the hole in the wall. "Hammer or axe?"

Brody raised an eyebrow.

"Did you turn the water off yet?" He asked as he handed Matthew the hammer.

While Matthew set to work, Brody stood back for a moment just watching; at the time when Brody had been trying to persuade him to stay in the Peacekeepers, it had stung to hear him say he had other skills to live on. Now that Brody was accustomed to the idea of Matthew living out his life as a civilian, it was a relief. Maybe handyman work could keep Matthew afloat now that he wasn't working under his old man anymore.

"I know you were looking." He said suddenly, though his tone was even and patient; with how prudish Matthew was of the idea of Brody's orientation, it seemed only fair to broach the topic gently. "It's okay, you know."

ffffff - Brody O'Rourke
1979 - Matthew Dunham

[Jack Lexington]

I assure him that I'm not idiot and turned off the water back here.

Instead of grabbing any of the tools Brody takes a moment to regain some strength. I can't blame him. It's hot today and the work pretty strenuous. I can feel myself tiring out quickly but there's still so much work to do so I grab the hammer and hack away at the bottom of the wall which puts me in an awkward, uncomfortable angle. Bits and pieces of concrete fly through the air spraying everyone in their vicinity.

Some bits hit me in the face so I try to blink some dirt out of my eye when I hear his voice behind me.
"I know you were looking."
I have no idea what he's trying to say but I'm too exhausted to ask iquisitive questions.
So I rub my eye and ask. "Huh?"
But I'm not looking at him but the hole in front of me instead that has barely gotten any bigger.
"It's okay, you know."
That's when I turn and raise my brows.
"What? I wasn't looking."

My arms hurt from the lactic acid so I drop the hammer and sit down in the dirt opposite of him.
He's obviously talking about the ladder. So his sensitive bi-radar caught the one time I check him out. Interesting? Why did I have to look so long?
"Maybe I did." My hand goes to the back of my neck to massage a bit, then brushes over my hair.
"What if. I don't know, Brody....you know." I was at a loss of words.
This topic had been a weird issue between us for a while and while I'm surely not interested in any guy I am still wondering what it would be like. Why he digs guys. Whether I could be the same?
"'Having a baby must be messing with me." Maybe I feel less of a man, a tough guy now. Am I exploring new sides of myself?

To play it all off as a joke I point at him. "You were practically staring at me the whole time."

[Artemis]

Matthew spent a good few minutes hammering away at some of the remaining fragments of wall just above the baseboard, blinking away debris getting in his eyes before turning to face Brody.

"What? I wasn't looking." He insisted, eyebrows raised.

Brody raised one back, his expression utterly unimpressed by the lie. Matthew sat on the ground, bits of wall debris in his hair as he let the hammer drop with a solid 'thunk' on the wooden floor; times like these, Brody honestly wondered if Matthew forgot that reading people was quite literally his friend's job, and he wasn't nearly good enough of a liar to pull a fast one on him. Let alone on a topic he was so obviously uncomfortable with.

"Maybe I did." Matthew admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. "What if. I don't know, Brody... you know."

The younger man laughed, obviously trying to lighten the mood, but if anything he came off sounding unsure of himself.

"Having a baby must be messing with me."

"What if... you fancy guys?" He finished for him. "Have you ever even tried it?"

Probably not, with how hard he shut down when Brody even insinuated holding him to his bet about a kiss; he idly wondered how many other guys, if there were any others, Matthew had this weird flirt-for-fun game going with.

"You were practically staring at me the whole time."

"Not the whole time," Brody said defensively, "But you were standing in front of me, shirtless, for like 2 hours. I'm only human."

And really, considering it had been months since he last got laid (Brody still was terribly self conscious of his scars, to say nothing of being incapacitated for the last 3 months), it was a wonder he'd kept his eyes --and imagination-- to himself for as long as he had. It wasn't really a fair scenario to put him in and expect him not to waver for an instant.

"I don't know what to think. You start Gay Chicken with me all the time, even though you always lose."

ffffff - Brody O'Rourke
1979 - Matthew Dunham

[Jack Lexington]

My laughter is nervous and not hiding my actually feelings too well. I'mnot sure how Brody does it but he knows what he's doing. He's good at sensing what people are going through I guess or reading them. I my case I've never allowed myself any thoughts of guys not have I ever wondered. Today was different. I was curious, more than usually and - be it age or becoming a father- I have changed.
I used to hate all girls and call all gay guys fags. No I have a steady girl friend and my second friend who's into guys. No wonder my curiosity has been awakened.


"What if... you fancy guys?" He says and I laugh out loud.
"That's ridiculus. I would know, don't you think!"
"Have you ever even tried it?"
IT? Hell no.

I just look at him blankly with a tad of anger. How can he ask that? How dare he?
"No!" I exclaim but with much less force than I usually would.
I don't recall much of that night at the camp fire and the truth or dare but I know I got damn close to kissing a guy- for the dare...or did I?

Brody tells me that he got a bit tempted when I was parading my abs around for 2 hours or so, which makes me close my eyes and hide behind my hand. Why did I not think about that.
Why does he even check me out? I mean I'd look at him and if he's well built think to myself that he's competition and I need to work out harder.
I would not feel anything now, would I?

"I don't know what to think. You start Gay Chicken with me all the time, even though you always lose."
I'm too tired to huff and puff or complain, plus this seems to be a moment of truth. His cards are on the table and he's talking to me nicely and in a quiet, non playful tone.
So I'd better consider a real answer- but what would that be.

I look at his face, study it for a moment. "The fairlypale skin, stuble, his blue eyes that are of a different shade of blue than mine, his nose- that looks like it might have been cracked once. He is a good looking guy. Attractive? Maybe.
"Me neither, man. I mean I see that you're a handsome fellow, you have a good body, even now. I see why girls would dig you. But that's where my thoughts end. I don't get the same kind of boner when I look at you as when I look at Kyanite."

He's all dressed and dirty though.

[Artemis]

The look on Matthew's face when Brody asked if he'd 'tried' guys, if not for how delicate the topic was, might have otherwise made him burst out laughing; his friend looked somewhere between indignant and horrified and even a little bit disbelieving that Brody had even asked him something like that.

"No!" He exclaimed, but it lacked the heat of his expression.

Brody did laugh a little when Matthew covered his face with his hand at the revelation that he had, in fact, been walking around half-naked in front of his friend for the better part of several hours. God, he really was a mess, wasn't he.

"I didn't mean sex, necessarily." He replied patiently, "Have you, like, experimented? I was positive I was gay for a long time before I tried girls."

And what a revelation that had been; Brody had never been worried about telling his parents he was attracted to men, at least not beyond that his overprotective dad would scare off any potential boyfriends, but it had been more than a bit of a surprise after a few years of being interested exclusively in guys, to suddenly find himself curious about the opposite sex. Another Peacekeeper, a girl who had graduated a couple of classes after him but was a few years older, had caught his eye fresh out of basic training and Brody could hardly think of anything else until he nutted up and approached her, trying to figure out why he was so drawn to the woman.

The rest was history.

Matthew looked at Brody for a good, long moment; his own expression was utterly serene, not bothered by either the subject or Matthew's discomfort. It was honestly hard to tell if his friend was trying to gauge Brody's mood or if he was really looking at him now that he'd more or less been given the go-ahead.

"Me neither, man. I mean I see that you're a handsome fellow, you have a good body, even now. I see why girls would dig you." He started, and Brody couldn't help but feel just a little bit smug having his ego stoked, "But that's where my thoughts end. I don't get the same kind of boner when I look at you as when I look at Kyanite."

At that, Brody raised an eyebrow.

"Not the 'same kind'. But you're not saying I don't do anything for you." He pointed out, "If I had to guess, I bet you've barely ever thought about guys that way much, have you."

ffffff - Brody O'Rourke
1979 - Matthew Dunham

[Jack Lexington]

Brody quantifies his statement about 'trying' guys by saying "I didn't mean sex, necessarily. Have you, like, experimented? I was positive I was gay for a long time before I tried girls."
"I wouldn't want to have sex with a guy."
I flat out state because the thought alone makes me tense.

"And no, no sexual experiments. I've never even touched a guy or been touched by one."

The topic makes me squirmish as usual and I feel my face become hot and most likely red.
Yet today I alow myself to pursue that thought and be a little more open about it than usually.
What would 'experimenting' mean.
Feeling up a dude? Putting my hands on his stuff? Kissing? Hang on.

"I did kiss someone on a dare once." I admit after Brody openly confessed about having relationships with guys and then finding out that girls aren't so bad either.

"What do you find in guys? I mean. Do you feel aroused...." I bite my lip because I'm really not used to talking about this with anyone, let alone another male.

"Not the 'same kind'. But you're not saying I don't do anything for you." He points out, "If I had to guess, I bet you've barely ever thought about guys that way much, have you."

"No, I haven't and honestly, I feel really weird talking about this with you. I my family we don't do that. My dad never taught me anything when it comes to sex. He acts like he never had it."

There's another long pregnant pause.
I just look at him and then simply tell him. "It's not that I find you unattractive. I just..." Once again I cut myself off because I don't want to be hurtful. Plus I'd like to know...just know a bit more even though I don't think I have it in me. I wouldn't want to do that to Kyanite either.
"So you find me attractive? In more than a friend kind of way?" I hold my breath because I really don't want him to say yes. That would make our time together and the way we interact very closely when we train awkward.

[Artemis]

Truth be told, the blush creeping into Matthew's face was precisely between being precious, and hilarious. Brody's most impulsive, shit-talking, hotheaded friend was blushing like a preteen boy having what was so far a pretty tame conversation about his orientation, and it was unbearably hard to resist the urge to poke fun at his discomfort. Of course, Brody had his own theories about why his friend was so conflicted about the idea of being with a guy, and he was pretty sure Mr. Dunham had a hand in it.

"I did kiss someone on a dare once." Matthew admitted finally.

"And? How was it?"

At this point, Brody was genuinely curious to find out what Matthew's big hangup was on the topic of sexuality, and it seemed like this was a conversation his friend rarely had the chance to air out and try to make any sense of. (Hell, Matthew seemed positively allergic to conversation in general.) Both of Brody's parents, to his knowledge, were straight, but they had still done their best to understand their son.

"What do you find in guys? I mean. Do you feel aroused...."

Matthew trailed off, either losing his train of thought or not wanting to say it out loud; Brody thought for a moment how to articulate his answer. It wasn't something he'd talked about at length much either, just that it kind of was and hadn't really had the need or occasion to put it into words.

"Besides the whole can't-get-pregnant thing?" Brody started, "It depends a lot on what I feel like at the time; sometimes I just need a change a pace from pretty and soft and feminine. Or I want someone else to take the reins for a while, and not as many women seem to be comfortable being aggressive."

It was hard to be honest without giving away more information than Matthew was probably comfortable with (and really, the details of Brody's sex life were none of his business if he wasn't a part of it), but it was the best Brody could really think of to try and illustrate the differences. He frowned as Matthew started babbling again, about how his own father had avoided talking to his son about it; theory confirmed. And it explained in no uncertain terms how Matthew managed to knock up his girlfriend.

"I've noticed." He replied mildly to Matthew's insistence at how awkward it was for him to talk about his orientation, "And I'm pretty sure not talking about it before has something to do with it."

He looked at his friend sincerely.

"Look, I'm not judging you. I'm honestly curious what's going on in your head, since it's obviously bothering you."

And it was more than a little bit of a relief to be talking about anything besides Brody's mental health.

Matthew was quiet for a long moment, looking thoughtful, and Brody didn't interrupt him while he gathered his thoughts.

"It's not that I find you unattractive. I just..." Matthew said finally, trailing off again before he could finish his train of thought.

"You just what?"

"So you find me attractive? In more than a friend kind of way?"

His friend didn't really look that thrilled by the prospect, by the way he was biting his lip and looking tentatively at Brody. He sighed, considering his answer.

"I'm not trying to steal you from your girl." He said finally, "But I wouldn't say no if you decided you wanted to experiment with a guy."

ffffff - Brody O'Rourke
1979 - Matthew Dunham

[Jack Lexington]

I never really understood why a guy would be into another guy. For me the same sex does nothing. No certain appeal or arousal, not like an attractive girl anyway. So I'm actually open minded and interested to find out what it is that draws Brody to guys because he seems like a man's man to me.

"Besides the whole can't-get-pregnant thing? It depends a lot on what I feel like at the time; sometimes I just need a change a pace from pretty and soft and feminine. Or I want someone else to take the reins for a while, and not as many women seem to be comfortable being aggressive."
That's a rather strange thought even though I do like getting wild at times. I'm unsure whether I'd enjoy wrestling with a girl or guy in bed or on the kitchen table.
It's weird enough for me to make a bewildered face.
"Maybe I'm just not experimental enough." I admit. Girl on top is wild enough for me.

"Look, I'm not judging you. I'm honestly curious what's going on in your head, since it's obviously bothering you."
I feel put on the spot. On a spot that I don't even know myself.
"I don't know. It's the thought of being skin to skin with a guy that does nothing for me and if I spin that thought further I don't want another guys bits, not even yours..." I give him a slightly amused look. "...near mine."

I've never crossed that bridge and imagine I never will. Simply talking about it feels like a completely new experience to me. One that I never expected to have.

"I'm not trying to steal you from your girl." Brody concludes. "But I wouldn't say no if you decided you wanted to experiment with a guy."
"I'll bear that in mind. You'll be the first that I turn to if I ever do." I'm quick to say because he's being nice and I'm trying to do the same for him but honestly, I'm just glad to get off the topic.
"I'm pretty sure Kyanite wouldn't want me to mess around with you or anybody else."
Hopefully the two of us and our baby will workout and I'll never cross the bridge into guy-on-guy land.

I get up again and brush the remaining debris off my pants and t-shirt but make sure it stay where it is.
Then I turn back towards the wall and start hammering away again. For a moment I interrupt my work and look across my shoulder. "You're not checking out my ass now, are you?" I cheekily tease.

[Artemis]

This time, Brody couldn't stop himself from laughing at Matthew's taken-aback expression at his reasoning for liking men.

"I don't know. It's the thought of being skin to skin with a guy that does nothing for me and if I spin that thought further I don't want another guys bits, not even yours... near mine."

Brody rolled his eyes.

"I don't know how you discovered girls, but unless jumping into bed on day 1 is your thing, I think you're getting ahead of yourself. You never mentioned how you liked that kiss, by the way."

He smirked.

"CPR doesn't count."

"I'll bear that in mind. You'll be the first that I turn to if I ever do." He said, clearly eager to put an end to the conversation, "I'm pretty sure Kyanite wouldn't want me to mess around with you or anybody else."

Brody bit back the urge to tell his friend to ask her; one step at a time, especially after just chiding Matthew for jumping the gun. Matthew go up, slapping the dirt and debris off of his clothes before turning back to the hole in the wall to resume his work.

"You're not checking out my ass now, are you?"

If that cheeky remark and smirk had come from anyone else, Brody probably would have kissed it off his face. He raised his eyebrows, gesturing indignantly at the offending body part (though Matthew's ass was anything but offensive).

"I wasn't, until you pointed it out," He replied, "For someone who's unsure how he feels about guys, you really seem to enjoy the attention."

He wasn't completely convinced that his friend walking around shirtless had been entirely innocuous; Matthew was too cocky for that. Brody had the nagging suspicion his friend was trying to goad him into making the first move, but so soon after clearing the air between them, that sounded like a bad idea to him.

Later, maybe.

ffffff - Brody O'Rourke
1979 - Matthew Dunham

[Jack Lexington]

I'm a little serl conscious now that we had the conversation and I actually had an open ear for a change. It does feel weird though and makes me worry what's happening to me. What's going on with the guy who used to hate girls as much as homosexuals? Since when is his mind so open and strangely twisted? Has that got to do with having a girl friend, a baby or a few experiences so extreme he could have died?
Most likely.
Maybe I've just grown up and opened myself up to other views instead of being so strongly influenced by my father.

"I wasn't, until you pointed it out. For someone who's unsure how he feels about guys, you really seem to enjoy the attention." Brody says but he couldn't be further from the truth.

While I do enjoy the attention of my girl friend, his makes me feel awkward.

I finish the job and declare that I have to go and buy new pipes before I can continue. Not really a two man job.

It's my out of this situation, so I grab my backpack, my wallet and a water to bottle to make my way into town.
"You can stay here until I come back, make yourself at home." I offer when secretly I hope he'll be gone when I return.

My wish is granted as after I haul back the pipes to my old house, I find that Brody has gone.
The rest of the afternoon is spent replacing the pipes and filling the holes with concrete again.

Totally exhausted I drag my tired body to the couch, pull an old scratchy blanket over top of me an pass out.

It doesn't take more than ten minutes until I'm snoring loudly. Some time that night I have a dream and unlike usually it's not about Kyanite or fighting or even Jins but Brody.

---

He is at my old house and not really wearing all that much, just a pair of shorts while pouring himself a gass of water in the kitchen.

Wth- why is Brody shirtless in my home?

"What are you doing?" I ask him while getting up from the couch and rubbing my eyes.

[Artemis]

"What are you doing?"

Brody looked at Matt, eyebrows raised mildly.

"You asked me to come over." He replied matter-of-factly, eyes raking the length of Matthew's body as he rubbed his eyes sleepily and padded over the wooden floor; being barefoot suited him. "Don't tell me you're getting cold feet already?"

He grinned behind his glass of water; Matthew's shyness about his interest in men was incredibly odd for a man as cocky and headstrong as he was, but at the same time was terribly endearing.

OOC: I figure this will be more of a blitz?

ffffff - Brody O'Rourke
1979 - Matthew Dunham

[Jack Lexington]

I'm dragging the blanket with me around my shoulders as I stand up to figure out what Brody is doing here and why he's half naked. Didn't we have a conversation about how inappropriate this was?

"You asked me to come over." He states and it doesn't sound like a jokebut then he's checking me out- head to toe from my crazy, long locks to my bare feet padding against the hard wood floors and everything in between. "Don't tell me you're getting cold feet already?"

Puzzled I look at him and then myfeet. "What? No!" What does he mean?
I rid myselfoff my blanket and throw it over and old arm chair before rubbing my chest through my shirt because the scar still stings on occassion like right now.

A little confused I walk past him to get a glass of water as well and ask.
"Why did I ask you to come here again?" As I pass him I notice that he's not as broken and untrained as he saw when I saw him last. On the contrary, he's almost back to his old shape.
"How did you get into this kind of shape so fast?" I'm impressed.

[Artemis]

Brody hadn't really had the luxury of getting a good look at Matthew, mainly out of respect for the fact that he was uncomfortable with male attention, and he thought to himself it was a shame that he'd held back. Matthew was a few inches taller than he was, and though Brody had certainly liked his short Academy haircut, the long hair and scruff was slowly growing on him (pun not intended); and, of course, the muscles Brody knew damn well were hiding under that shirt.

It would have to go.

"Why did I ask you to come here again?" Matthew asked, sounding lost.

Brody chuckled.

"You were pretty specific about how, if you ever wanted to experiment with guys, I'd be the first person you called." He replied nonchalantly, "So here I am."

"How did you get into this kind of shape so fast?" Matthew asked in a baffled tone, and of course that would be the first thing he noticed.

But at least he was looking.

Brody set his glass down on the counter, moving to stand beside Matthew and lazily lean against his side, chest pressed against Matthew's arm.

"Don't you like it? You helped me build back up."

ffffff - Brody O'Rourke
1979 - Matthew Dunham