amputate it twice grim :: beck/arc
Sept 28, 2021 18:37:28 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Sept 28, 2021 18:37:28 GMT -5
"...so we're almost there, yeah?" Quiet train ride, I don't know what I really expected. Maybe that's for the best, right? If I'm gonna roll with the punches I may as well forget about getting everything right. There's going to be mistakes - that much I can admit to myself. If perfection was easy, everybody would be a victor.
Nah, it's the mistakes that matter the most honestly - - whoever makes the least gets to live. It's overwhelming in a way, I don't tell Annie what's going on in my head, I don't want to freak her out. Last thing I need is for her underestimating me; I'm good enough to do this, I know I am. I've been in the boy's cart strumming away and mulling everything over, the tid bits they've already given us and the years of training mixing together rough around the edges. This is what I wanted, right?
A challenge?
But then I get to pacing. I start thinking too much, like what the arena would be and what I'll do regarding each climate. If it is a beach, people are going to be honing in on Nixie & I -- even the other careers. If it's a desert, I'm a fish out of water, my cousin already told me that. What do I say for the interviews? I'm a career, not exactly a goddamn spokesperson.
I've been to the D.C., will they used that against me? Being Annie's cousin makes things dicey and I can't stop thinking the little things over. Maybe that's what lands me in Beck's corner of the train, knocking twice before sliding the cart door to face the newest victor.
Five years already, he won the year I moved up to the academy I'm with now.
Don't meet your idols and all that, "hey, uhh," I'm better with a javalin than I am with words. "Would you mind hearing me out for a bit? I've got a few questions, and," well, I don't want to freak Annie out, and there's not many other options. Part of me wonders if I'll be tired of the train ride after a few years too, if after five years would I start seeing kids like me like an investment.
Well, Mr. Hailsham, invest all you want.
"Is Annie like, a good mentor?" God I hope so -- I want to think so, but I need to know a little. "Figure you know more than me," Beck Hailsham, her first victory.
Fuckin' please let me be the second.
Nah, it's the mistakes that matter the most honestly - - whoever makes the least gets to live. It's overwhelming in a way, I don't tell Annie what's going on in my head, I don't want to freak her out. Last thing I need is for her underestimating me; I'm good enough to do this, I know I am. I've been in the boy's cart strumming away and mulling everything over, the tid bits they've already given us and the years of training mixing together rough around the edges. This is what I wanted, right?
A challenge?
But then I get to pacing. I start thinking too much, like what the arena would be and what I'll do regarding each climate. If it is a beach, people are going to be honing in on Nixie & I -- even the other careers. If it's a desert, I'm a fish out of water, my cousin already told me that. What do I say for the interviews? I'm a career, not exactly a goddamn spokesperson.
I've been to the D.C., will they used that against me? Being Annie's cousin makes things dicey and I can't stop thinking the little things over. Maybe that's what lands me in Beck's corner of the train, knocking twice before sliding the cart door to face the newest victor.
Five years already, he won the year I moved up to the academy I'm with now.
Don't meet your idols and all that, "hey, uhh," I'm better with a javalin than I am with words. "Would you mind hearing me out for a bit? I've got a few questions, and," well, I don't want to freak Annie out, and there's not many other options. Part of me wonders if I'll be tired of the train ride after a few years too, if after five years would I start seeing kids like me like an investment.
Well, Mr. Hailsham, invest all you want.
"Is Annie like, a good mentor?" God I hope so -- I want to think so, but I need to know a little. "Figure you know more than me," Beck Hailsham, her first victory.
Fuckin' please let me be the second.
