Too Painful To Take (Open)

[Tea]

Ivan

District Two seemed so different. Although it probably hadn't been more than a month or so since he'd last been there, it was still always such a shock to go back after being in the bush for extended periods of time. Really though, going anywhere urban after being isolated for any amount of time was always an eyeopener. Sometimes he would be away for so long, Ivan would forget the sound of his own voice, or the look of his face. That was scary, and not something he looked forward to. It was during times like those that Ivan wanted nothing more than to go back home, and back the the life he had once lead. This definitely wasn't one of those times.

More often than not, Ivan dreaded going to District Two. There had been many times that he'd approached its outskirts only to turn around again, lacking the courage he needed to continue on. Two so much reminded him of his old life and all the people he had left behind, it was sometimes too painful to take. But, it was also a reminded of what he still had: his freedom. Something that so many people lost in the Hunger Games. What Lily had lost. No. This wasn't about Lily. Not today. Pushing her to the back of his mind, as he was often forced to do, Ivan continued on, not even knowing where he was going. Of course, he'd have to get a job at some point, if only to occupy his time, but right now, this wasn't about occupying his time. Right now, it was about just being in District Two again, taking it all in. Sure, it was only a matter of time before all hell broke loose, but for right now, that worked for Ivan.

[CC is SO Sorry D:]

Shayden Agatu

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Shayden Agatu walked along to streets of District Two in summer clothes, despite the fact that it was almost Autumn. It had been unbelievably warm lately, and Shayden rather enjoyed the fact. Normally, all of the flowers in her garden would be dead by now. However, some were still in full bloom. It had been a good few months this year. There had been plenty of rain, which was perfect for her plants, and the sun that had been shining lately had made the soil absolutely perfect.

The only problem was that she had run out of supplies for her garden. In February, she had bought fertilizer and plenty of other supplies, and now she needed more. The rain had caused pests to come to her garden, too, and she needed to see if there was any seaweed imported from District Four that she could use to lay around her plants. Hopefully the wide leaves would obscure it from view if she did manage to get her hands on some.

Shayden reflected on her garden quietly to herself. It seemed as if it was the only thing keeping her sane right now. Her parents had recently decided to take on a project together, and they only came home early in the morning. They left at around six too. Shayden hadn't seen them in approximately two weeks.

Aaliyah had gotten angry at her two days ago. Sweet, little Aaliyah. Shayden had felt her drifting away lately. So like Cedric. When Shayden had tried offered to go out with her the other day, Aaliyah had blown up at her, saying how Shayden wasn't their mother and how Aaliyah was quite capable of taking care of herself, thank you very much.

Shayden had been feeling horribly guilty the past few days. She knew an apology was in order, but she didn't know what she should say and do. Shayden hated meaningless apologies, and she usually went beyond that, begging for forgiveness. Because Shay really was the type of person who was honestly sorry for making mistakes.

She was looking for a shop that might have something help her in her apology, but all of the buildings seemed empty and lifeless to her. The lined up neatly, with signs on the windows that had cute slogans. Shayden ignored them. She was looking for the perfect thing.

Shayden glanced around the streets, which seemed to be filled with a multitude of different people. One man was carrying his young daughter on his shoulder, and she wore a large grin on her face as she sucked on a small lollipop. She looked as if she hadn't had anything sweet in a long, long time, and Shayden smiled at the scene of her looking so happy.

As the man and his daughter walked, the passed an old beggar man who somehow seemed very vibrant and energetic. He was talking to a middle-aged woman who looked related to him, with a big grin on his face.

Shayden sighed. She loved to see lively, joyful people. Unfortunately, she felt rather conflicted at the moment, and she just a little too down to feel the warm atmosphere around her, which was rather unfortunate. Shayden hung her head sorrowfully.

With her head down, she wasn't able to see where she was headed. Without any warning at all, she smashed into another human being, falling over backwards onto the ground.

ooc: I really need to get more creative with having people run into each other... xD[/blockquote][/blockquote][/color]

[Tea]

Ivan

As he continued walking, watching people pass him. Each of them a different story, different goals. That got him thinking. Not about things that he normally thought about either. About people, and their habits. Ivan was a loner by trade, and wasn't ever really one to associate himself with others, not even when he had still lived in the district. Sure, he had friends, but back then he had been a career, constantly training. When he had finally come around to realize what was really important in life, all those friends were gone, and Ivan hadn't blamed them. Some of these people were probably like he was, the fact they liked to be alone. Others, the vast majority of them, liked human company. That was normal. Ivan though, wasn't normal. He didn't need to be in the company of others to feel welcome. But of course, it took a special kind to be a wanderer.

So deep in thought, Ivan wasn't paying any amount of attention as he rounded the corner, coming into contact with something that was unmistakeably human. A woman. Before he knew what was happening, she was on the ground. "Dammnit," Ivan muttered, looking down at her. "God, I'm sorry. You alright?" Ivan said, offering her a hand. Then, seeming what was his new fascination, he wondered what her what her story was. What kind of company she preferred. Although he knew it was stupid of him to even think about things like this, he couldn't help but hope that maybe he'd find out.

[CC is SO Sorry D:]

[[ooc: Sorry for the late-ness. There's also a very minuscule amount of power-play. Shayden takes Ivan's hand and I had him pull her up. I was hoping he was planning on that anyways?]]

As she fell on the ground, Shayden felt a flash of anger. Ugh! What an awful day! Was it too much to ask for some peace and quiet? Mostly she felt unsettled in her mind, but now she had to fall to the ground too! It wasn't fair. Her life was spinning out of her control, and she couldn't stand it. Ced was ignoring her, and Aaliyah was angry with her. She couldn't keep track of what everyone was doing these days, and it was so upsetting, that Shayden felt like bursting out in fury.

But she didn't. It would be far too out of character for her, and she would feel so guilty for snapping at someone like that afterwards. It was so unlike her to act rude, and she wouldn't want to get off to a bad start with whoever had knocked her down. After all, it was also her fault.

She looked up from her place on the concrete, and saw a boy (man?) about her age. His face was a little long and pale, and dark brown hair fell down to his jaw. His eyes were a grey color Shayden found intriguing, mostly because they seemed antagonized. A tortured soul. Of course, he must be.

Shayden was good a reading people.

Although she had no clue what he may feel tortured about. So many bad things could happen to a person that could simply crush them. Shayden wished she could help him, but she didn't even know him. But helping people was pretty much what she did, and it had never been so obvious to her that someone needed help.

He was a perfect gentleman, offering her hand and asking if she was alright. Shayden smiled, all traces of anger gone, and took his hand. "I'm fine, thanks. Sorry about that, but I wasn't watching where I was going. All my fault."

Now standing, she shrugged nonchalantly. He was looking at her a little curiously, just as Shayden had scrutinized him earlier. She fidgeting, slightly uncomfortable, and tried to keep smiling, although it waned slightly. "It's a nice day, isn't it?" she asked, to start a conversation.

It indeed was a beautiful day, or so Shayden thought. The temperature had recently dropped, so it was slightly cool, and the wind blew pleasantly throughout the district. Normally, on nice Autumn days like this, Shayden had high spirits. However, it was not the case today. On Fall days when she wasn't in the best of moods, she often thought about how all of the flowers and herbs in her garden were dying, and how winter was approaching. That, in general, meant that the death toll was getting higher in the districts.

Even in their medicinal district, they couldn't save everyone. The cold caused even more sickness. Even if they did operate some of the best labs, those were meant for the Capitol. They couldn't always save their own. Shayden found it a point of sorrow. Didn't they deserve to live? It was so depressing.

She briefly wondered if this man (she had decided that he seemed too burdened to be a boy) had lost someone because of the unpleasantness the Capitol caused. She couldn't be sure, of course, but it was always a possibility. Shayden felt guilty for the discomfort she had felt earlier.

And she had thought her brother ignoring her was bad.

[Tea]

ooc- So sorry for the lateness! I juat...gah, I fail.

Ivan

Thankfully, the girl took his hand and as Ivan pulled her to her feet, he could tell that she wasn't annoyed at his carelessness. Her face softened as she spoke, saying that it was all her fault. Ivan shook his head. "Nah, I wasn't really paying attention much either." He looked down at her. The height difference between them was borderline ridiculous. It really couldn't have helped much in the events leading to their collision.

"I doubt our height difference helped much either," Ivan added. "I mean, not that that's an excuse or anything but..." His voice trailed off. Maybe it would be best if he just shut up and let her do the talking. That was, if she intended to stick around. After he'd just rammed into her the way he had, Ivan was surprised this girl was being so friendly about it in the first place.

It's a nice day, isn't it?

So. She was going to stick around. At least for a minute anyway. "Yeah it is," Ivan replied, even though he honestly hadn't bothered to notice the weather. As far as he was concerned, as long as it wasn't raining or something of that variety, the weather was insignificant. "When the sun's out like this, it makes you forget that winter's coming." Winter. A wanderer's true enemy. Apart from the Capitol, it was usually the only thing that could spell death. If you weren't properly prepared, Winter always came as a surprise, and you suffered. Suffered almost as much as the tributes did in the arenas. Like Lily had. "I hate winter," he muttered, without thinking. "It kills almost as many people as the Captol." Damn.

[CC is SO Sorry D:]

[[ooc: Sorry....I kinda fail. My life is so busy right now, and I don't have any all that much muse for Shayden.]]

He was trying to blame the mishap on their height difference, and it made Shayden laugh lightly, the sound ringing like a bell and then echoing as it abruptly faded away, because she felt kind of bad for laughing. It just hadn't been a good week for her or her family, and it didn't seem like the right time to joke about anything.

"I hate winter," he grumbled, probably thinking that Shayden wouldn't hear him. "It kills almost as many people as the Capitol." Shayden quirked one eyebrow. He had spoken with a particularly bitter tone. She suddenly knew with certainty that the Capitol had killed someone he loved; it was obvious to her from what he had said. Shayden's heart reached out to him, and she wondered if there was possibly anything she could do to help him.

"I'm sure whoever you lost, they're at peace right now," Shayden said, before she could bite her tongue. Stupid! Who knows, maybe he hasn't lost someone! Maybe he did, but they're an Avox! How tactless are you, Shayden?! She felt like she had just said the worst possible thing. For all she know, his lost companion had died painfully, slowly, and violently.

The Capitol did so many terrible things. They ruined the lives of so many people. The Games were going on as she thought about them, and tributes could die at any moment. And the Games were publicized. Just thinking about what went on behind closed doors made Shayden shiver violently. She had never blindly trusted the Capitol, only tolerated what they did because really, what could she do?

Nothing. There wasn't a single thing she could do to help any of the people in the Capitol who were being tortured. Shayden wasn't naive; she knew that some people were living in extreme pain because of their corrupt government. She knew that she was incredibly fortunate that she wasn't dead, that her family wasn't dead. She knew that she was selfish and self-centered to worry about her family falling apart.

But what else could she do? She didn't have control over anything. She had no influence in the laws of the country she lived in, she just lived by the laws of country. Shayden constantly wished that she could bring peace, but she couldn't. She accepted that it her hopes and wishes couldn't do anything, and neither could any of her actions, because they would get her killed if she did something wrong. She just had to deal with it.

"So...uh, what did you say your name was again?"

[Tea]

ooc- Bah, I have no Ivan muse either.

Ivan

Ivan smiled down at his new companion as she laughed. It had been so long since he had heard the sound of a laugh, the sound of someone suppressing their joy, but he welcomed it like an old friend. When she stopped so suddenly, Ivan thought he had said something offensive. Well he had, in a way. Saying that winter killed just as many people as did the Capitol had been a beyond stupid thing to say, especially in public like this.

Apparently though, she didn't care how stupid his comment had been, because she came right back and made one of her own, assuming that he had lost someone to the Capitol. Which he had. But she didn't know that. Somehow, she had been able to pick on on the fact Lily had been important to Ivan, and that she had died at the hands of the Capitol. Those were people reading skills that Ivan didn't possess, and to be perfectly honest, he was rather impressed.

Smiling bitterly, Ivan nodded. "Oh I don't know. I hope so. Considering the absolute brutality of her death, I would really hope so. Sighing, Ivan glanced up at the sky, wondering if Lily was up there, or somewhere else. He didn't know what he believed in, if there was an afterlife or not, but wherever Lily was, he hoped she was happy.

He was pulled from his train of thought when she asked him for his name. "Ivan Terrior," he extended a hand for her to shake. "And yourself?"