(OPEN) Everyone Get's Scared... Right?

[Stare]

Luciana Trevers

The bruise on my shoulder sends waves of pain down my arm. I pull slightly at my shirt to hide it as I walk, dipping my head low and hunching my shoulders. I use my red hair, which is ablaze in the sunlight, to hide my face, letting it hang in my eyes as I walk through the bustling sidewalks of the district.

My heart stops every time someone so much as brushes past me; you can never tell who will be the next person to hurt you. I wince as someone bumps into my shoulder, and let out a whimper.

Even someone in your own home could strike out at any time.
Not that I'm complaining. I acted out of line by asking him to go to the market while I trained the birds. I deserved the blow. I'm just glad no one else was around to see it.

For some reason, people get a little upset when they see him hit me. I can never figure out why, though. It's not like I can't pay for the bandages.

Reaching the store I'm looking for, I walk in, pulling out some money from my pocket and gently set it on the counter. The clerk hands me my package, and I thank her before walking out.

I got permission from my father yesterday, when he was still sober, to get myself something from the store for myself if I raised enough money. I got payed last night, so I should have just enough...

The jingle of the door announces my presence as I walk cautiously in the store. I quickly find what I was looking for.
The rusty old key dangles from a black chain. It's old fashioned looking, almost like an antique. The store owner claimed to have found it deep in the woods one day, and said it could be hundreds of years old. Hundreds or just days, I really don't care. I like it, and it's a privelage for my father to let me have it.

I pull it off the rack, quickly pay, and with some difficulty, my boney fingers manage to work the clasp in the back. I let my hair fall over it, study myself in the mirror for a moment, and, satisfied, leave.

I'm just getting out of town when someone knocks into my from behind, I crash to the ground, and the birdfeed inside my bag goes flying all over the ground. I gasp, and desperately try to salvage as much as I can. A few hands come down, and I cringe away, waiting for them to hit me, stumble a few steps away on all fours, and collapse onto my back.

[davy]

Johnathan Davis

The day had been the average day. He had awoken and gone into the woods. He did this everyday. He didn't know why it just made sense to him. Maybe it reminded him of his home in District 9. He had convinced his father that he was working with the deer because no one else does. The excuse had sounded so stupid at the time, but his dad had bought it.

Today he found himself in his usual place. A rocky outcrop overlooking a small cliff. He liked it here. It did remind him of District 9. It had been a huge transition for him. He had been paid to kill animals, and he had been good at his job. He had always made enough money to feed himself without anyone's help. It wasn't like he had to do that, but he wanted to act as grown up as possible. He was thinking right now of his grandfather who had died back in District 9 right before they had left. In many ways he thought his grandfather was lucky. He would have hated it here. He had been the best hunter in the district. He wouldn't have been able to make the transition.

It was getting late and he would need to start back for home. He tried to stay in the woods, but as the darkness started to come he couldn't see. He would have to take the road."Good bye." He whispered to the woods. He walked out of the woods, onto the road, and into a girl he hadn't ever seen before. Something, I think it was bird seed spilled out of the bag. He started to help her pick it up and she scrambled away. She looked scared of me." It's o.k. I'm not going to hurt you. Sorry about running into you." I said. I picked up what birdseed was left and put it in her bag. Then I extended a hand to help her up." Hi I'm Johnathan." I said.

[Stare]

I'm shaking like a leaf, using my elebows to prop me up, lightly dusted in the dirt I stirred up when I fell. I watch him with wide brown eyes as he picks up the rest of the birdseed and puts it in my bag. A coulpe of times, I try to stand, only to trip on my own feet and go plunging down again.

"It's okay, I'm not going to hurt you. Hi, I'm Johnathan."

Still not trusting him, I watch his arm. Years of experience taught me how to tell when the arm is about to strike. So that I'm ready for it, or, if it's someone from school, I can dodge it.

I see the muscles in his shoulder tense, and I scramble back a few feet. But no, the hand is just staying there. Not doing anything.

Not able to think of anything else to do, I finally manage to steadily stand up. I hide my face behind a curtain of red hair that I let hang in my face, and move a hand across the bruise on my shoulder, trying to calm the dull pain.

"I-I'm sorry," I say, still trembling.

I do my best to stay a good distance away from him as I brush myself off.

Unsure of what to do next, I consider getting the sack of birdseed, just to be polite. But what else? I'm not exactly the social person, not to mention I'm absolutely terrified.

And I'll be late. I once again rub the bruise, knowing what awaits me when I get home. Just the thought of it makes tears press at the back of my eyes, but I force them to stay in.

I glance at the bag, then back at him, and finally raise a skinny arm to point at it. "Th-the birds w-won't eat that."

The birds! I think of them, waiting for me back at home. What was it I told father? As soon as I got home, I was going to take Athena out for a training session!

Relief floods into me, knowing there's no way he could tell I was late if he thinks I'm in the woods training the falcon. The falcons wouldn't eat the birdseed, of course, but it wasn't for them. I was planning on going into the woods early this morning to talk to some of the gentler birds.

When I was younger, I would've been afraid to go. I would've been scared they'd make fun of me. But now, I don't care.

They already know I'm crazy, so what's the point in trying to hide it?

[davy]

As I extend my hand to help her up she scrambles back away from me. Then she stands up herself. There's something weird about her. She seems like she's afraid I'm going to hurt her. Why would she think this. I didn't mean to run into her. Besides it would be totally unethical for me to hurt her. I decided the only way that I was going to get her to trust me would be to be nice.

I keep putting the birdseed back into the bag. Then I hear her start to talk." The birds won't eat that." She said. Why was she stuttering. Was I really that scary. I hadn't even considered that the birds wouldn't eat it after it had been dropped. I hadn't even considered that the birds were going to eat it. I knew that it was birdseed but I didn't really care what happened to it after I left.

I looked up from the bag and at her and said," Oh sorry about making you drop it. I have some money with me. Let me buy you some more." I said. Half of me thought that she was just going to ask me to leave. She didn't seem to like me being here. It was actually starting to get on my nerves. What caused a her to behave like that. I notice that she's been rubbing her shoulder since I knocked her down. I really hope I didn't hurt her. Then I say," Oh no! I didn't hurt your shoulder did I?"

[Stare]

I stare at him, surprised. For a moment, all fear is gone, replaced by curiosity that shows in my big brown eyes as I watch him closely.

"Of course you didn't do this to me," I say, the surprise washing everything else out of my voice. "I gave myself this bruise when I asked something of my father. Of course, I deserved to be punished."

Then I stare at the birdseed, and step forward quickly to grab the bag. Not feeling panic, though, I decide that I don't want to offend him, and stay there. "Oh, no, you don't have to buy me new bird seed. I-I was just going to feed it to some of the b-birds in the forest. It wasn't for the f-falcons. Besides, if father found out I w-was spending money on bird seed, I'd be punished. I really should b-be thanking you."

Then I realize that I'm being impolite, not introducing myself. I force the tremor out of my voice, and plaster a small smile on my face. "My names Luciana. Luciana Trevers. I'm the falconer of this part of the district."

It's funny. A lot of people don't realize how much profit there is in being a falconer. The birds already have the natural ability to catch food. All you have to do is bend that ability slightly to work for you. After that, not only do you get payed, but you get the prey the birds catch for dinner. It's a luxurious life, and meat is ten times more delicious fresh than it is from the market.

However, people have told me I have a gift. That being able to train birds is something you have to be born with. I was born with more than that, though. I've always had a special connection with birds. The weirdest thing about the relationship is when I'm around them, I'm not scared.

But of course, since training birds and my special connection with them came so naturally, I always assumed everyone else just chose not to. Now I realize how lucky I am.

But just then, the dull pain in my shoulder brings me back to reality. I once again run a hand over it, and the image of my father's strong hand pops into my head.

Yeah. Lucky me.

[davy]

Good at least I didn't hurt her. I would have felt guilty even though I hadn't hurt her. I already did feel guilty for knocking her down and making her drop the birdseed. It felt wrong not taking her to the market and buying her more, but I guess she didn't have any extra money to spend on more. I felt my pocket. I felt something in there. It was my wallet. How much had I put in it this morning. I think it was fifty dollars. I wait on her to finish talking.

I wait I don't know what to say. I'm sure I look like an idiot just standing there staring at her. Then I decided to go with what felt natural." Hi Luicianna. Sorry for running over you." I said. Then I remembered the birdseed. I could probably buy it for her. After all it was only seeds. How much could it cost. So I decided to try one more time." You wouldn't have to buy the seed. It was my fault that you dropped it in the first place. I think I have enough money for it." I say.

Then I focus on another part of the conversation. She said that she was a falconer. What was a falconer exactly. I hadn't been here for very long, and all these names of people who looked after animals were still a blur to me. I was still getting over the fact that when I saw a nice juicy squirrel I couldn't kill it and sell it to the government. Instead I would have to give it a home and feed it and take care of it. It all seemed so stupid to me. I decided that with this train of thought I wasn't going to get anywhere. I decided I might as well try to ask her." So you're a falconer. I just moved to this district. I used to live in District 10, and I don't really know all the jobs you guys do here. Could you please explain to me what a falconer is. It sounds like an interesting job." I said. It was honest. Maybe I would learn something new here. Maybe this could be my future job. It sounded cool enough. Falcons were very majestic birds. I had always been interested in birds of prey. I wait to see what her response to this is.

[Stare]

(Ohhh, you've done it now! Watch me ramble on about Luciana's love of her job! ;D)


What's a falconer?

In my world, that's like asking what air is. Birds are my life. Being a falconer is something I couldn't live without. I stare at him for a moment, unsure of where to begin.

How about the begginning?

"Being a falconer is where you train birds- specifically falcons- to hunt," I say, my voice very steady. The only thing I'm not scared to talk about is my job.

"Of course, you have to know how to train them. It's rather simple, actually. I birds' natural instinct is to hunt. Making them give up their prey is the hard part. Otherwise, you just have to let them do their job. Most falconers have their own birds. I don't, but I have one that comes back for regular sessions to keep her skills sharp. Her name's Athena."

I could stop there, but it doesn't seem like enough. I feel like I've left out everything important. So I keep on going.

"When you train a bird, you have to be careful. I bird can hurt you, even when it doesn't mean to. Talons are sharp, and can leave scars. You have to wear a leather strap. And of course, helmets. You can't have the birds get scared."

I pause for a moment, trying to come up with words to descrip the feeling. The freedom, the burst of energy, the wonderful sense of protection, of pride...

"Being a falconer isn't a job. It's an ability. A privalige. You have this incredible connection with the birds you train. They're so free, so graceful... it's amazing to be able to have one obey you, know you, trust you... Of course, you don't have to be a falconer to have a hunting bird. All you need is a falconer to train one. A good one, too, or the birds will be flying away with your dinner."

I smile slightly, staring at the ground and kicking up tiny dust clouds with my feet. Being a falconer... it makes life worth while for me. Of course, maybe I've taken it one step too far, but still...

"It put's money in your pocket and food on the table, too," I say quietly, although it sounds incredibly shallow. At least, to me it does.

Then I look up at him, my eyes filled with caution again. "And seriously, d-don't worry about the birdseed. It's fine."

[davy]

I listen to her explain her job. It goes on and on and on. How long can one girl talk about birds. Sure it sounded like an interesting job. Maybe even something he would like to do, but the way she went on with it was like she didn't need any air. I kept waiting on her face to turn blue and for her to pass out. I didn't want this to happen, but when people don't breathe for long periods of time that's what tends to happen. Finally when I think she's almost done she starts again. After I don't know how long she finally stopped.

At first I couldn't think of anything to say. It was getting dark out. If she was afraid of me then she probably didn't like the dark to much. I decided not to start on the topic of going home yet. Instead I would keep talking about her job for a while." That sounds like a cool job. I don't really know what I'm going to do when I grow up. I just moved to this District last year. It's so much different than my home in district 9. I used to be a hunter. Actually I was one of the best hunters in District 9. I could throw a spear, and spear birds. I could kill just about anything I wanted with a bow. My personal favorite was to lie in wait for a deer and kill it with a knife. You probably think this is all evil though since you've lived your whole life taking care of animals. Do you think you could show me your job some day I think it could be the perfect job for me?" I said.

Wow now she probably would never want to see me again. I used to kill animals. Some for the Capitol, and some for myself. It was getting later and I guess the question that had been running through my mind for a while now couldn't be avoided for much longer. I took a look around. I looked at the woods. They were so full of animals. It was like the old saying water water everywhere but not a drop to drink. Animals were everywhere out there, but none of them could be killed. I looked at the sky. The first stars were just starting to come out. It was one of my only friends left. Were these the same stars I had seen on countless nights hunting. I looked at Luicianna. Was this the same girl I had just run over while leaving the woods. She seemed much more confident after talking about her job.

What did this have to do with anything. This had nothing to do with what he was about to ask. Then it occurred to me that I had probably been staring at her for a few seconds." Sorry. I was just thinking. It's starting to get dark out and I figured you would probably be wanting to get home. I was wondering if you would like me to walk you there?" I asked. Hopefully she didn't think I was too weird.

OCC: Sorry for taking so long to reply. My algebra teacher has been swamping me with homework and I've barely had any free time for the past week.

[Stare]

((OOC: It's fine!))

I hesitate. Didn't someone once tell me never to go somewhere alone with a stranger? I think I learned that in school but all I can pull up is a man's wrinkled face and sunken eyes and something about kidnapping. I didn't listen much more than that, though.

"You know, killing animals isn't th-that bad. We have to to survive. And, um, a-actually," I say quietly. "I was going to train a bird."

I bite my bottom lips hard. Don't say it, don't say it, don't- ouch! I relax my jaw and run my tongue over the torn flesh and blood. Ugh.

And then, before I can stop them, the words leave my lips. "You can come watch if you want."

If only words were things you could pull back out of the air. Why did I say that? Stupid! I'm not social. People... they don't want to watch a silly little girl train a falcon. They want to hit, and hit hard. Why else would I keep to myself?

But of course, you can't take backk words once they've left your mouth. It's impossible. That's why you're supposed to think before you say them.

So what do you do, then? Laugh, maybe, and pretend it's a joke? That could work. That would work. Would it?

Or maybe, I could just walk away. That would work too, but it would be kind of rude.

So instead, I just stand there, wrapping my arms around myself as the wind blows my bright sunset hair away from my face. I don't care anymore, though. If he's going to hit me, let him, and then I can get back home and train the birds. They could help me forget.

My finger runs over the goosebumps on my arm, and the chain of the necklace is like ice against my skin.

It's getting cold. Hopefully, he'll just say no quickly and I can leave.

But then again, things haven't been going the way I've hoped all day.

[davy]

I'm thinking about going I really am. My parents aren't worried about me getting home after dark. They know that I can find my way back. She's obviously not worried about getting home, or she wouldn't have invited me to watch her train a bird. So I think it's probably okay to say yes. Then I think of what she said earlier about training the birds. What she had said sounded so personal and deep. It sounded like her release from life. If it was that important than she would probably want to do it alone.

On and on I think over the question. Should I go or not. A cold wind snaps me out of it for a second. It was going to get really cold pretty soon. I was glad I had my thick hunting jacket on to keep me warm. I had come from farther north so when it felt cold here to most people then it felt o.k. to me. I wondered if the birds would act the same in cold weather. I thought they probably would. I would really like to go and watch her train a bird. I thought it would be really cool.

Finally I decided I had thought about this decision long enough. If I thought about it for much longer then she would probably leave. I'm just about to accept her offer when I notice that she has no jacket. She must be freezing out here. To me it's only a little cold, but to her I'm sure this feels like a freezer. I know I'll be fine without my jacket so unzip it and hold it out to her."Here have my jacket if you need it. District 9 is a lot farther north than District 5. So I'll be fine without it." I say. Then I realize that I've forgotten to tell her something."I almost forgot. I would love to watch you go train a bird. Thanks for offering." I said. Now it's her turn. I hope she takes the jacket. Without it she will be a Popsicle in no time at all.

[Stare]

For a moment, I consider turning down the jacket. He must be cold in weather like this. But District Nine is cooler than this district. And poorer. Although a place where hunting is considered life... well, that sounds a lot more like home to me than this place.

"Thanks," I say, offering him one of my rare smiles.

Instead of putting the jacket on- I'm too small to really fit in it anyways- I wrap it around me like a blanket. It's still warm, and for a moment I savour the difference in temperature.

I honestly didn't think he'd say yes. He looked kind of bored when I was talking about being a falconer, and not many would want to watch me call out to Athena a million times. Or watch me struggle as I try to get her to let go of her prey.

Now, no longer too afraid of him, I feel myself relax. My legs stop shaking, at least. However, his size- at least a head taller than me- keeps my on alert. You just never know...

"My house is really close," I say. "Just around that corner and up the small hill. I'll get Athena, my equiptment, and a jacket, and we can head into the forest. It'll be dark, so we can use some night vision glasses, too."

My voice doesn't tremble once. The idea that I actually might avoid a new bruise tonight and the promise of training Athena is just enough to block out fear, if only for a little while.

Not to mention, I love training at night. The fresh air, the silence, the distant glow of the district... it's one of those things you never really get used to.

"We should get going," I say quietly, looking up at the sky, which is quickly loosing it's light.

I begin to walk towards the corner, wrapping the jacket tighter around me. With the light, about a fourth of the warmth is leaving the air. I press my lips together, glad I wore jeans today. Clutching the jacket with one hand, I reach up to clutch the key. It's freezing, and I let my arm drop back down, just as I reach the corner.