Billy Midas 7

[phuzebox]

Name: Billy
Age: 15
Gender: Male
District/Area: District 7
Appearance:

Midas is tall with moderate composition. He has short red hair that naturally falls to the front. With fair skin with slightly tan arms and legs he enjoys the shade of trees rather than the beating sun. Billy's long hands, that are splattered with calluses, and broad shoulders help him grip an axe firmly, and swing it too. His legs are muscular from running, which he does often.

Billy has freckles scattered across body, especially his face. He has a mix between brown and green eyes, like a light hazel. Thick eyebrows shadow those eyes. Billy's skin is moderately hairy. Scars Paint his back like cracked glass from flogging. He also has a long scar across his chest from falling out of a tree when he was a child. When it comes to muscles and build, he has a good build from swinging axes all day, (wide chest and smaller hips) but not quite the equivalent of a trained killer.

Personality:

(Read History first, some of this doesn't make sense if you don't)

Midas tries to be as humorous as possible, even in horrible situations. However, sometimes that can get the better of him. He gets too cocky and eventually forgets he is in a horrible situation! In reality, he is just trying to cover up the condition of his mother and the death of his love.

He is also a very nice guy. he likes to take the load off of many people who do not seem to benefit from their load of wood, but that will not stop him from killing someone when he is in danger. As his mother slips in and out of diabetic comas, he constantly slips in and out of his emotions. he tries to be friendly and social, but when his main concern is his mother, he refuses to be social.

Overall, he hopes not to live much longer without finding another girl, (He is obviously too blind to see that there are plenty of fish in the sea) so he wishes that someday he will be reaped, so he could join or avenge her in someway. He has grown with a hate for Peacekeepers and a resent for the division of the districts. He also abhors the Capitol when he is frustrated, but he manages to keep on keeping on, as happy as he strives to be.

History:

He was given the name "Matchstick" because of his red hair, and because he can be quite hot-headed. His mom retired (Type 2 Diabetes) from cutting up the trees, but his dad works along-side him constantly. His Dad taught him all there is to know about throwing an axe, but he still misses from time to time. However, his older brother, Wren, never misses. Wren is the most competitive peer in the Midas family, Billy would probably be second. It could be from getting groceries to carrying logs, Wren always wants to be first.

Billy is loved by his community because he often takes off others' load of lumber. When he gets angry, he goes into the woods and finds peace. He had a girl in school whom he loved, but she stole food in order to feed her family, thus she was flogged by peacekeepers. later, she died from infections of her wounds. He gets mad that he didn't stand up for her but he has learned not to be too angry at himself unless he needs to be. This is mostly why he goes into the woods. other times, it is because of family matters.

He's gotten in trouble with the peacekeepers twice. Once because he was caught too close to the governor's daughter (Restricted), and another because he wouldn't keep quiet about the girl he loved (Flogged). He still has scars from the flogging. though he is constantly bombarded with his mother's comas and his love's death, he still manages to find himself happy and ready for whatever comes next.

Codeword: odair
Comments/Other:

Attachments:

[cass]

Hey there Phuzebox, welcome to the site!

You have a good start to a character here, but unfortunately before your character can be accepted you are going to need to meet the minimum requirements for your bio. The appearance should have two paragraphs, personality three and history three paragraphs as well. Each of your paragraphs should contain a minimum of five sentences. Make sure you watch your grammar and punctuation -- a sentence starts with a capital letter.

Broad shoulders. freckles scattered across body. green eyes. thick eyebrows.

This is not considered four sentences, merely four stated facts that you have cut short to make into four very short sentences. Try expanding on this; give me more than simple green eyes and broad shoulders. Does he have scars, cuts? Is one eye smaller than the other? Are is shoulders muscular and broad, but holds little muscle? Try and construct a picture of your character and then put it all into words. Remember that whoever is reading this bio is trying to see what this character looks like, how they act and what makes them tic. They are human, and every human looks different and has more than a few features to their appearance and personality.

Another small problem with what you have here is the fact that if all your hair was burned off it would not grow back as another colour. I was unsure of this at first and so I have actually looked this up and from the numerous amounts of websites I have checked the only time it would change colour is if you were going through chemo therapy -- which is not available in the districts. So you will need to change that.

Please make these changes and reply back here when you are done! ^^

[phuzebox]

Ok, good. I fixed it up, according to what you said. the reason most of my sentences weren't headed was because I usually rely on MC word to do that for me.

[cass]

This is lovely, Phuze! You've really gotten the idea of beefing up those paragraphs. But I do need you to add three-four more sentences in both the appearance as well as the personality.

One other problem in your bio is the fact that in his history you have said the girl he loved was killed in the games. I'm sorry, but that for that to be possible she would have had to of died in any game below the 54th as those games already had reapable tributes, as the site has ran -- so far -- games from the 54th to the 63rd (anytime in this time span is unacceptable to have had a character reaped, but remember if you choose to change it to say the 53rd, it needs to fit in with his timeline) -- which means that there were already tributes for district seven. So you will need to change that!

As a small side note, if she was reaped, she would not have rotted away. Every inch of the arena is covered in camera's and more so when a tribute is killed that is the kind of thing the Capitol wants to show everyone, so her body would not have been lost.

So edited your app and reply back when you have done so and we will take another look <3

[cass]

Much better, good job!