please, [u n d e r s t a n d] // {soap/magenta}

[umber vivuus 12b 🥀 [dars]]

S P A R K , A N D I T ' S L I K E G A S O L I N E

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M A G E N T A R Y K E R

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The train was cold.


At least to Magenta is was. But they could have been headed for the surface of the sun, (weren't they, though?) and still her bones would rattle against her skin, too terrified of what was to come and struggling to contain the emotions she kept swallowing back. Magenta did not cry. She didn't. She wouldn't let herself. She sat at the booth most opposite of a boy called Soap, who had apparently volunteered in place of another boy. She would have been scared of him if she hadn't been so out of it as soon as the name "Magenta Ryker" vibrated through the Square as if lightning had struck her core. He was a little dirty, with a slightly crooked nose and big pointed ears, but he wasn't entirely unfortunate. His dark hair complimented his eyes, which looked incredibly sensitive and perhaps still shocked that he had volunteered himself for slaughter.

"Can I ask you something?" The girl asked, leaning forward and placing her elbows on her knees, propping her chin up on her hands. She didn't wait for the boy with bravery in his eyes to answer. "Why did you volunteer?" It was incredibly personal, she knew it, but she guessed it wouldn't make much of a difference to him now. Surely he'd be asked the same question by Ceasar Flickerman in front of a live crowd and, of course, all of Panem. At least now he would have a little more practice pulling the words out, either from the bottom of his heart or his ass. She wondered if he actually would lie to her, or if he would open up. She tilted her head and tried to look friendly.

If she hadn't been so depressed, (how else would one that was just summoned for slaughter supposed to feel?) she might have smiled at him, or encouraged him to just talk to her. She might have used her charm, that look in the pits of her eyes that always made boys melt, to make him melt in to putty that was free for her to use, but visions of how she would die and when (the bloodbath, maybe?) kept clawing at the inside of her skull, and it was all she could do to hold back the tears.

She stood, walking over to his side of the train car where they waited. She didn't know why, but she wasn't just trying to fill in the silence of the train gliding along the tracks so quickly that seeing the world outside in a perfect view was difficult unless they practically focused on the horizon. Magenta was a social creature, and she was desperate to fill the void in her heart. She needed comfort.

Her father had tried to comfort her when he came. He said her mother had passed out and was being brought to the medical center as they spoke, and he promised she would be fine, that he was sure she would want him to hug her an extra time. She had almost started crying, (she wasn't supposed to cry, dammit.) but then the peacekeepers flew into the room and stole him away after allowing only a small hug. They took her father just as quickly as they had allowed him in, and she felt even more lonely than before. She blinked away the fresh memory and stared at Soap. She found his name ironic, since he obviously didn't use enough of the stuff he was named after. She took a seat next to him and nodded slightly, as if giving him a signal to start speaking. "Sorry, not trying to be rude. Just... curious."

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template by chelsey

[Sunrise Rainier D2 // [Thundy]]

This girl's name is Magenta Ryker, and she's as pretty as any other girl in District Nine. I mean this from a highly objective viewpoint, of course, because they're all pretty and I wouldn't ever do anything 'bout it, especially because I don't think it's respectful to look at a girl in a certain way just because I might be dying soon. But she definitely looks like one of the pretty ones, I can tell, and interesting to boot. But I guess every girl is fascinating if you've never had any good practice in talking to them, which is my problem - girls may as well be a whole other species, and not a one of 'em wants a thing to do with me. Guess I don't blame them - if I were a girl, I probably wouldn't be too interested in me either. Dirty and big-nosed, that's what I am, and poor too. I've got nothing to show for except for the ability to make people dislike me, and that leaves me with nothing but a bad situation come the start of the Games.

I just wonder what the sponsors will think when they see who I am. My district leaves me with little hope for the future, as District Nine hasn't exactly been hot property for victors in the past. We're the kinda people that tend to be ignored, the kind that drift away into the background until the Games forget us and we die. It's either that or we die early, and I don't know which is worse: lasting a few days and maintaining hope, or losing every sliver of a chance right at the start?

I don't know what my family will do if I die. Will they be compensated for my death? Will someone reach out to help them survive out of sympathy? They don't need much, just enough to get ahead, just enough so they don't end up starving.

"Can I ask you something?" Magenta pipes up, and I'm tugged immediately away from my thoughts, which is probably for the best.

For a moment, I just sort of stare at her blankly. Talking with her kinda involves actually looking her straight in the face, and that's too much. I avert my gaze towards the floor and mumble something like "Yeah," but I'm not sure if she can actually hear me.

After a brief pause, she continues on. "Why did you volunteer?" she asks, her voice curious. I don't see why I shouldn't tell her, but I hesitate because I'm nervous and because I need to start training myself to think differently, like.. like someone I'm not. Like someone whose life depends on what they say. After a moment of consideration, I decide that I'll tell her.

Before I can speak, she gets up from where she's at and walks over close to where I'm sitting.

"Sorry, not trying to be rude. Just... curious."

I shake my head quickly, but my eyes still aren't meeting hers too well. My gaze has fallen somewhere near the top of her head, and I can only hope it looks like I'm thinking about something deep.

"Nah, nah, it's.. it's no problem. I mean, curiosity never hurt anyone.. well I guess it might have, you know, with the cat and whatever killed it, but uh.. yeah, it's no trouble."

This is it. I'm awful at talking to girls.

My eyes start moving to everywhere but her face, so I find a steady spot on the wall and anchor my gaze there.

"I, uh.. I mean, you know, you've got family, right? If you'd believe it, I'm the first of six children, and my family wasn't too well off even before the kids, so far as I've heard. It takes a toll on us. I don't go to school anymore - well of course not now, but you know what I mean - 'cause I spent that time working to make soap every day to support my Mom and my Dad and the rest of 'em, only it isn't helping. My brothers and sisters are growing up and they're needing more food and prices are getting higher and I mean.. there's nothing I could do. If I kept going like that for a few more months, someone was gonna starve."