D2 ] Lyulf/Leah Descartes \\ finished
Feb 27, 2014 10:42:02 GMT -5
Post by анзие (Anz) on Feb 27, 2014 10:42:02 GMT -5
"My name is Lyulf Descartes. Sometimes I'm known as Leah Descartes. I'm a sixteen-year-old genderfluid, and they call me different and stuck-up. They might have a point."
________________________________________________________
He's Lyulf. And Leah. He's Lyulf and Leah because that's who he is and really, no one can say anything about it. It's his choice and sometimes he wants to be Lyulf, while other times he's more partial to being Leah.
Sometimes he's neither, and he is whoever he wants to be. They call him Lyulf still, then, and he responds because he can be gender-free but he's still someone.
Leah is equally as important to him as he is to her. They're not separate entities. They're the same person, in fact, but when he speaks about Leah, or when Leah speaks about him people misunderstand, like they're wont to do. Until they figure it out. Until they realize that they're actually one person - Lyulf and Leah in one body.
Then they laugh.
And leave.
Just as they're wont to do.
Lyulf tries not to mind, though Leah's a bit more openly sensitive to rejection. (Ze does mind, no matter how much ze denies it, it's truth and ze can't really change fact.) But Lyulf can harden his heart and breathe and move on. Remind himself that he's a prize to be won.
But either no one's caught wind of that fact yet, or there isn't anyone interested enough in playing for his friendship because the little clues he leaves haven't returned to him; no one's tried to find the owner of the things he leaves behind. They're little insignificant things he thinks he can do without: pens, feathers from his hats (sometimes they find their way to his brown hair, he doesn't quite know how but they do), lucky coins. Sometimes he leaves behind the letters he spends most of his nights thinking up.
Small, insignificant things, all of those. And it's the little things that should bring the motivated running but there are none.
Leah is a thief no matter who she chooses to be. But that label only fits less than half the times Baptiste and Estella say it does, anyway. Besides, Leah only takes what she really needs - like a pen she's left behind just earlier in the day. Or the scrap of thrown homework.
She doesn't steal vases or jewelry or anything of the sort, no. That's not her style. But while it rarely happens in district 2, she's fairly certain that if it did, should she be in a five mile radius around the scene, she'll be the first suspect no matter how she pleads, what with the trend at home (ze didn't take any of those things, well except maybe the pen but ze didn't touch the last piece of cake at all). If it really were Leah, she'll have left a feather behind in trade. Not that it matters.
But the trade is important. The trade is significant because she's leaving behind a clue and it's balancing everything out and it's Leah's way of trying to make people happier for what she's done (though half the time it doesn't have the desired effect). She doesn't want anyone to feel upset, after all.
(And if they're interesting in getting their stuff back they know where to find zir.)
Most of the time no one bothers. And that hurts a little, more than a little, because no one wants to take the bait, try the quest. It's not that difficult and he wants to found even if he isn't lost at all.
A part of Lyulf hates this. Hates feeling like the only way he'll ever get any interest is through being enigmatic and elusive (everyone else in his family is perfect, wonderful, charismatic, interesting, faceted diamonds where he's a pebble in the stream). But he's a prize, god damn it, and he wants someone who's willing to give a little more than small talk because he knows (hopes) once he's caught they won't ever let him go.
(It's all he has left to think of and it's what he wants: a friend to crack open his shadowed heart and listen for pearls that fall from his lips).
He's tall at almost six feet and lanky with dark, almond-shaped eyes that ze sometimes likes to bring out with a little bit of charcoal around the rim (messy, but smudging it does wonders). His hair is dyed chestnut brown and he keeps it long-ish and in his eyes - for now, at least, until zis fancies change. His nose is mostly straight, he thinks anyway, despite the beatings it takes if and when he shows up at the Academy.
Thankfully, Lyulf's face has a feminine quality about it, what with the roundness of cheeks that look like they may never square out into a man's jaw. He's grateful for that if only it makes being Leah so much less stressful (she cries when she sees the blemishes - scars, bruises -that Lyulf struggles to cover, both inappropriately shamed and channeling the emotion in different ways; her confidence would be low should she look more like a man than a girl in public; she wants to be pretty as much as anything else).
Leah holds little interest for significant others, not that she gets a whole lot of suitors. (She can really only recall one incident where someone seemed interested in all the wrong ways; it'd passed when the boy realized she was Lyulf as well as Leah.) While people might say Lyulf's too stuck up to get to know... well, he doesn't have much to say against that because Lyulf knows he can come off that way. But he's just not really interested in knowing any of them as a friend or more than... until they prove to zir that they're willing to jump through a few small hoops for zir, of course.
Sometimes he's neither, and he is whoever he wants to be. They call him Lyulf still, then, and he responds because he can be gender-free but he's still someone.
Leah is equally as important to him as he is to her. They're not separate entities. They're the same person, in fact, but when he speaks about Leah, or when Leah speaks about him people misunderstand, like they're wont to do. Until they figure it out. Until they realize that they're actually one person - Lyulf and Leah in one body.
Then they laugh.
And leave.
Just as they're wont to do.
Lyulf tries not to mind, though Leah's a bit more openly sensitive to rejection. (Ze does mind, no matter how much ze denies it, it's truth and ze can't really change fact.) But Lyulf can harden his heart and breathe and move on. Remind himself that he's a prize to be won.
But either no one's caught wind of that fact yet, or there isn't anyone interested enough in playing for his friendship because the little clues he leaves haven't returned to him; no one's tried to find the owner of the things he leaves behind. They're little insignificant things he thinks he can do without: pens, feathers from his hats (sometimes they find their way to his brown hair, he doesn't quite know how but they do), lucky coins. Sometimes he leaves behind the letters he spends most of his nights thinking up.
Small, insignificant things, all of those. And it's the little things that should bring the motivated running but there are none.
Leah is a thief no matter who she chooses to be. But that label only fits less than half the times Baptiste and Estella say it does, anyway. Besides, Leah only takes what she really needs - like a pen she's left behind just earlier in the day. Or the scrap of thrown homework.
She doesn't steal vases or jewelry or anything of the sort, no. That's not her style. But while it rarely happens in district 2, she's fairly certain that if it did, should she be in a five mile radius around the scene, she'll be the first suspect no matter how she pleads, what with the trend at home (ze didn't take any of those things, well except maybe the pen but ze didn't touch the last piece of cake at all). If it really were Leah, she'll have left a feather behind in trade. Not that it matters.
But the trade is important. The trade is significant because she's leaving behind a clue and it's balancing everything out and it's Leah's way of trying to make people happier for what she's done (though half the time it doesn't have the desired effect). She doesn't want anyone to feel upset, after all.
(And if they're interesting in getting their stuff back they know where to find zir.)
Most of the time no one bothers. And that hurts a little, more than a little, because no one wants to take the bait, try the quest. It's not that difficult and he wants to found even if he isn't lost at all.
A part of Lyulf hates this. Hates feeling like the only way he'll ever get any interest is through being enigmatic and elusive (everyone else in his family is perfect, wonderful, charismatic, interesting, faceted diamonds where he's a pebble in the stream). But he's a prize, god damn it, and he wants someone who's willing to give a little more than small talk because he knows (hopes) once he's caught they won't ever let him go.
(It's all he has left to think of and it's what he wants: a friend to crack open his shadowed heart and listen for pearls that fall from his lips).
-&-
He's tall at almost six feet and lanky with dark, almond-shaped eyes that ze sometimes likes to bring out with a little bit of charcoal around the rim (messy, but smudging it does wonders). His hair is dyed chestnut brown and he keeps it long-ish and in his eyes - for now, at least, until zis fancies change. His nose is mostly straight, he thinks anyway, despite the beatings it takes if and when he shows up at the Academy.
Thankfully, Lyulf's face has a feminine quality about it, what with the roundness of cheeks that look like they may never square out into a man's jaw. He's grateful for that if only it makes being Leah so much less stressful (she cries when she sees the blemishes - scars, bruises -that Lyulf struggles to cover, both inappropriately shamed and channeling the emotion in different ways; her confidence would be low should she look more like a man than a girl in public; she wants to be pretty as much as anything else).
Leah holds little interest for significant others, not that she gets a whole lot of suitors. (She can really only recall one incident where someone seemed interested in all the wrong ways; it'd passed when the boy realized she was Lyulf as well as Leah.) While people might say Lyulf's too stuck up to get to know... well, he doesn't have much to say against that because Lyulf knows he can come off that way. But he's just not really interested in knowing any of them as a friend or more than... until they prove to zir that they're willing to jump through a few small hoops for zir, of course.
fin
. codeword .
odair
. other .
When referring to Lyulf and Leah together (ie: in zis head, shared thoughts), I use gender-neutral pronouns (ze/zir/zis), but when they're separate I'll use the traditional pronouns. No offense is meant, it's purely for my own brain to keep up with what I'm writing.
Also, I don't mean to offend anyone who identifies as gender-fluid, and therefore if you feel like I'm representing some aspect of your sexuality wrong with this character, contact me and we can discuss it <3
Also, I don't mean to offend anyone who identifies as gender-fluid, and therefore if you feel like I'm representing some aspect of your sexuality wrong with this character, contact me and we can discuss it <3