William Weslton -{D4}<DONE>

[Deleted]

Name: William Wesleton
Age: 17
District: 4
Gender: Male
Codeword: odair


Appearance

Personality

History

[Deleted]

William Weslton

Appearance: Dirty blonde hair sweeps over a rugged face with dark green eyes. In the eyes there seems to be anger and it emits the memo: "DANGER!" He has a masculine body and strides with an air of arrogance through the streets of district four as if he owns it.

A group of people follow behind him like they are a group and he is their leader, which he is. At night he can be seen drunk at parties or with a girl in bed doing... stuff. Quite a few girls he knows go crazy over his body. Once, a girl he was at a party with poured a lot of water on his shirt on purpose just to get him to take it off. He obliged. The way he does stuff like that just says that he likes people looking at him. If someone starts to stare at him he just stands still and let's them inspect him.

His father though, is not much of a looker and William has a few traits from his father he despises. He has bushy eyebrows which makes him look weird in his eyes and he gets pimples easily.

Personality:

William brings the meaning of vain to a whole new level. He would get very angry at someone if they don't say anything nice about him or thinks that he was magnificent and hot and all that stuff. If someone doesn't say that he is marvelous they need to be ready to have quite a few swear words thrown at them.

William isn't the smartest person there is. Though he can generally figure things out after a while but isn't very good at figuring things out quickly. The highest honor award for his school doesn't go to him. In most of his classes he has at most a F. In fact he likes to skive off school a lot so mostly he should be getting even worse grades for missing most of his classes. When peacekeepers try to catch him he always finds a way to wriggle out of their clutches.

William likes to go to parties every night despite his parents putting a curfew on him because he doesn't do his homework or school really. His parents don't have much control over William because he thinks that he is the most important person in the world and he was spoiled his whole life so he thinks he can do anything. He sneaks out through his bedroom window a lot, or did until his parents nailed boards over it, and then he just started sneaking through the door which sometimes went unsuccessfully. Often he likes to go out and get drunk. For him you can't do anything without alcohol.

William is quite strong physically and is a great swimmer, but he hates his job. He hates swimming and he hates fish and every day he is expected to go catch fish in the salt water he hates.

History:

William was born into a rich family in district four. When he was little he was a spoiled brat. His parents got him anything he wanted. When he grew up he became rude and selfish, getting angry if he didn't get what he wanted. His parents thought it was just a phase and so they let him have the stuff he wanted. Then when he was fifteen he wanted alcohol. His parents didn't know but he started to drink and he loved it. He got it from his friend who liked drinking. At first he resisted his friend's impulses to get him to drink but William eventually gave in after he was called a baby.

He started sneaking out at night to go to late night parties. And when he had to go home from the parties he normally brought a girl into bed with him. He likes to cheat on girls and see their shocked expressions when they see him with someone else.

When he was fourteen he started to not care about school. School seemed incredibly small compared to him! School was just to boring so he basically quit. He didn't go and skived off lesson and he never did any work. He was lazy.

Actually he was lazy his whole life. Starting from when he was a little baby to when he was a big, muscular seventeen year old.

[Deleted]

Finished!

[[nyte]]

Hey Puppy, just a few things to work on with this bio~

Most girls go crazy over his body.

-This can lead to powerplay, as you are suggesting most of the girls he will roleplay with will find him attractive, while it might not be within the character of more than a few to do so. Perhaps change this into him thinking that most girls think he's attractive, but avoid blunt statements like this.

Once, a girl he was at a party with poured water on his shirt on purpose just to get him to take it off. He obliged.

-This isn't believable. If someone spilt water on my shirt, unless it was in great amount, I wouldn't take my shirt off. I don't know a lot of people who would. Please elaborate on the situation, as to why it would have ended with this.

-Your appearance is very thin, please expand on it. What color are his eyes? How is his face structured?

-He needs an appearance flaw. Being arrogant isn't really anything to do with his appearance. A human being isn't completely perfect as you've listed William as being.

He would kill someone if they don't say anything nice about him or thinks that he was magnificent and hot and all that stuff. If someone doesn't say that he is marvelous they need to be ready to have a few broken bones, quite a few swear words thrown at them, and to be badly injured.

-This seems a bit dramatic. Perhaps he could get very angry if someone insults him, but I don't think the peacekeepers would let him outright maim someone.

In fact he likes to skive off school a lot so mostly he should be getting even worse grades for missing most of his classes.

-So why doesn't he get lower grades? Please elaborate

William likes to go to parties every night despite his parents putting a curfew on him because he doesn't do his homework or school really.

-Why don't his parents punish him/why don't they have any control over him? Please elaborate

He started sneaking out at night to go to late night parties where there may be orgys.

-This is not appropriate for the pg-13 rating on this site, please remove this detail.

When he was fourteen he started to not care about school. School seemed incredibly small compared to him! School was just to boring so he basically quit. He didn't go and skived off lesson and he never did any work. He was lazy.

-Then he wouldn't receive a C+ average in school. Please change/elaborate.

-Perhaps run this through a grammar checker? There are small grammar problems such as using "your" instead of "you're" or "to" instead of "too" making it quite confusing at time.

Thanks and reply when you've make these changes~

[Deleted]

Thanks Nyte! I fixed it I hope!

[[nyte]]

Definite improvements, but seeing as you have been here for a while we do raise our standards for bios~

Which causes people to get scared; That has to annoy some people.

-This is the same problem with powerplaying as before. Please reword these phrases to make them more ic for him and less controlling of other's characters

In most of his classes he has at most a F+.

-Other than this not being an actual grade (Most school systems only include an F, no "plus or minus".) The peacekeepers would also do something about this as schooling is required for the students of Panem, just as it is for children here. He could not pay attention and fail, but not attending school and failing would get him punished.

A lot of times his skin seems to take on a very light green hue which he tries to hide show much as possible.

-Drug use does not turn your skin a light green color. Depending on what drugs he's using it could have various effects such as open sores or a clammy, pale complexion. Also, you'll need to go more into detail on how he gets these drugs and how he got into drugs. Whether he's a full blown addict, or someone who just does it at parties etc. just throwing in that he does them is too vague.

-this also does not count as an appearance flaw, as he could stop using it and become "perfect" again. Please add something on his body such as crooked nose or bushy eyebrows. Something which is genetically on his body which makes him imperfect.

His parents don't have much control over William because he thinks that he is the most important person in the world and he was spoiled his whole life so he thinks he can do anything.

-I do understand this, but they are his parents. if they are /putting/ a curfew on him that means they are not complete pushovers letting him do whatever he wants, so why wouldn't they punish him for disobeying?

His parents didn't know but he started to drink and he loved it.

-How did he get the alcohol? Where and Why did he want to start this, please elaborate.

[Deleted]

Sorry it took so long... FIXED

[[nyte]]