hush your beating heart [Cato]

[arx!!]

eirwen birch

district 2 - eighteen - the devil's spawn

Logan Blackmore. There was something off about this boy; I just know he is hiding something. The family gathering had proved he was nothing - yes, nothing. It was a disappointment to find that every single Blackmore would be a lovely new addition in cult Asyria's ranks - except for Logan. I thought maybe I was missing something, that maybe while he had left the room he had proven himself incapable of love. (For love was deadly, and love was not acceptable within the ranks.) However, I had yet to see this detachment. I had only seen the way he and Milo had embraced, leaving me to believe he was, in fact, too attached to his relations within this world full of infidels to join the ranks as a loyal servant of Asyria and our cause.

But I was aware of the skills that each and every Blackmore possessed, and I was sure that with further assessment I could find what I wanted to see in this boy. They were all killers. And even that statement is a bit vague and under-representing their talents. They were brilliantly trained assassins, born and bred to not only kill, but do it so swiftly and silently that not a single being knew a death had occurred. It was a pure talent that every Brother and Sister of Asyria needed to possess, and this family - the Blackmores - were the best in all of Panem.

So as it is, I have planned to intercept him. Just as talk. Simple. I needed to ask him a questions to determine where his loyalties truly lied. I was certain he knew little of me - that was my job within the cult, to remain hidden, yet noticeable. He may know my name - Eirwen Birch, daughter of Noah and Eleanor Birch, cousin of Cassius Birch, Beatrice Birch, and Ares Pine, the eldest sister of Milo Birch (whom he may or may not have true feelings for) - but he knows nothing else. I masquerade as a quiet, yet popular schoolgirl, a sex icon, and a Birch. A stage name. That's all it is. An elaborate act that I have managed to convince the entire District of, all in order to convert those worthy of a better life. And real family?

However, I am not on assignment. I reported back following the gathering, and was told to keep a close eye on every Blackmore excluding Logan, due to what I had witnessed of his behavior. This was all off the map. I had told my parents I needed to practice my night fighting and had told my fellow Brothers that I would be forced to stay in for dinner by my parents and unable to attend the rituals and ceremonies being performed tonight. But in reality, I had other things planned - none of which included brushing up on my Career skills or eating a family dinner.

I left the house dressed in a Games replica outfit (which I believe is based on the 60th in honor of Mr. Bryze) which looked ridiculous enough that if I had to pick between dying and wearing that outfit again I would gladly kill myself. But I had brought a change of clothes with me, deciding to sport some jeans, my signature stilettos, and a shirt that flashed bits and pieces of my tattoos just for a bit of fun. Because what isn't more fun than catching some cute boy in some dark alley all alone, right? (Again, I have to voice how talented Milo is, finding that gem.)

I had been watching for a few days now, and I was sure he would be coming along soon. I keep my knives hidden beneath my pant legs, just in case something happens to go wrong. Though I so hope it doesn't. Killing someone with such charisma would truly pain me. But it was all up to him whether or not I stabbed him and twisted the knife or gave him a goodnight kiss on the cheek. Either way I would be smiling at the end of the night, but something tells me he would much rather be alive at the end of this meeting than dead.

I smile as I hear a scuffling at the end of the alley and see a silhouette approaching. I push off from the wall where I had been leaning for the past hour, and make my way towards him, but not getting close enough that he could kill me as he was trained to do. I stop short of him and call out instead, quietly, only in the middle of the night my voice seems to echo. "I hear you like the taste of Birch." I say, crossing my arms and continuing to smirk, though I doubt he can see it in this light. "Not sure why you are wasting your time with the inexperienced sapling when you could have the full grown one." I pause, but only for a moment.

"I can assure you I know much more than Milo does."

---

i’m faking glory
lick my lips, toss my hair
and send a smile over

[Cato]

Logan Blackmore

"Dialogue"
"Hearing"
Thoughts
Narration

A lot has happened lately. That fail of a dinner between the Birches and Blackmores had been just that. I don't remember who called for the dinner and why, but many things were revealed that day. Who knows if I'm even welcomed back at the Blackmore house. I want to leave the house, but my mother would want me to stay. It's a hard decision due to Aragorn. The man is insane. If he wants to kill me well it should happen already. His crap about being a family doesn't apply to me. Remaining in that house of his will only be detrimental to my well being. I haven't truly decided if leaving is what I want. It'll take some time for that decision to reveal its self. In the meantime maybe a walk in town will do me some good.

The fresh air does feel nice. Before the disaster at the house, I always stayed inside. Its been awhile since I've roamed the district looking for some fun. I haven't done anything in so long, but that's ok. Keeping a low profile for once will sit nicely with me. I notice an alley which I decide to approach. Keeping a low profile would be nice, but something about that alley screams to me that there's a victim waiting to be killed. With each step I take, I make up my mind to kill whoever happens to be in the alley with me. A voice I didn't expect speaks out to me. "I hear you like the taste of Birch." Maybe killing her will only cause my death. She must be a Birch if she dares to say something like that. This girl does look intimidating though.

"Not sure why you are wasting your time with the inexperienced sapling when you could have the full grown one." Now I am confused. What does this person mean? I don't even know how to respond to that statement. "I can assure you I know much more than Milo does." Now I get what she meant earlier. I'm still a bit confused though what she means. I search my neck for the all too familiar feeling of the bone knives. I don't want to admit it, but I'm kind of intimidated right now meeting a Birch here. I move the necklace to my back pocket. With those out of the way this Birch shouldn't have a reason to hate me. "I... I.. I'm afraid I don't know what you mean miss." Damn it why did I stutter on my words. This person surely will laugh now.

[arx!!]

eirwen birch

district 2 - eighteen - the devil's spawn

I can tell by the way he stands that he wasn't exactly expecting a Birch, though he had to have been expecting someone, judging by the way he reaches for the knives he hold so close. (Not going to lie, I feel like maybe I should run before he gets the chance to use them.) But what's more surprising is how his eyes don't flash with rage or his feet don't move to chase me down and kill me right then and there. It's not like the "party" had been much of a success. But despite even this assurance, I can feel my heart pounding against my ribs. I hate being afraid.

He reaches for his necklace of knives and I get ready to reach for the knives hidden at my ankles, but he only moves the necklace to his back pocket, leaving me pretending as if I weren't panicking only seconds before. But I continue to wear the smirk proudly upon my face. Only my uncrossed arms and on edge stance give away the fear that had threatened to overtake me. What. A. Rush! Who knew this night would turn out to be an adrenaline junkies dream? I sigh, no longer fearing for my life.

"I... I.. I'm afraid I don't know what you mean miss." And I can't help but scoff. This poor boy had been just as afraid as I was! Funny. Who could have guessed that a Blackmore could be intimidated by a Birch? The Blacmores were the trained assassins weren't they? Not us! I was almost beginning to believe that this whole "sweet and nice" act was just all part of this boy's master plan to trick me into getting close enough for him to pull the knives from his pocket and kill me ... slowly ... silently ... But I slowly make my way closer to him anyway, my heels clicking loudly in the quiet alley.

"Oooh, how cute," I say, coyly, mocking one of those high-pitched, popular girl voices that I hate so much. "The great Logan Blackmore can't even talk to girl without tripping on his words. That's just precious." I step closer and smile. I'm close enough now that I can see his face and the features that were once obscured by the low light. "Tell me," I say softly, leaning closer to him, my hands on my hips. "What is it you see in her? I promise whatever you say will just be our. little. secret." I wink at him and bring my finger to my lips, looking him over again (not just because he is hot, oh my Ripred I am not that shallow) to check for any other possible weapons hidden beneath his clothes. Hmm. None that I see. Okay maybe there is one in his pants? I avert my eyes back to his.

"I saw the way you two were at the party, so don't you dare play coy." I move my hands back to my hips, trying to act intimidating despite the fact that Logan is quite capable of overpowering me. "What sort of relationship do you have with my sister?"

---

i’m faking glory
lick my lips, toss my hair
and send a smile over

[Cato]

Logan Blackmore

"Dialogue"
"Hearing"
Thoughts
Narration

This girl approaches me. I don't know whether I should reach for my knives or flat out flee from the scene, but something I don't know what prevents me from running. Maybe deep down I want to find out who this Birch is. Why is she here in a dark alley? Did she follow me? This is something I'd like to find out. "Oooh, how cute, The great Logan Blackmore can't even talk to a girl without tripping on his words. That's just precious." I'm way too stunned to speak. This girl is mocking me! I can talk to a girl, but the circumstances of meeting like this would surely stun anyone in my position. I had been prepared to kill her before I knew who she was. If Milo or any other Birch found out that I had been prepared to kill her, I'd be dead the next day. As it is, I'm still too embarrassed to speak up. Avoiding another stuttering spree would be beneficial to my standing with this Birch.

"Tell me, What is it you see in her? I promise whatever you say will just be our. little. secret." I can see her now. Her hands on her hips which I try not to stare at for too long. She looks.... No! I will not stare. Milo would kill me many times if she saw me like this. I close my eyes only to open them and see the girl wink at me. Did she catch me staring? Ripred I hope not. If Milo is told of this encounter well I better go into hiding. Our eyes meet which only serves to further my inner embarrassment. Its like this girl can see inside my mind which further unnerves me. I had been eager to enter this alley, but now I want to get out of here at the earliest opportunity. Of course wishing for that and doing it will be two different things. "I saw the way you two were at the party, so don't you dare play coy."

Busted! Everyone saw Milo and I act extremely friendly. It was me though that acted more flirtatious. This girl probably wants to kick my ass and tell me to leave Milo alone. "What sort of relationship do you have with my sister?" Damn a sister not just a cousin, but a sister. I'm in for it now. Its hard to choose whether to tell her the truth or lie. For all I know, Milo set this encounter up to see how I'd react to one of her siblings questioning our relationship. After what happened at the party though, I'm not so sure where Milo and I stand. Our friendship could be just that or it could be more than that. "I'm not entirely sure where I stand with Milo. I've been wondering whether I should go further with my relationship with her." I silently pray Milo's sister doesn't utter the words I fear.

[arx!!]

eirwen birch

district 2 - eighteen - the devil's spawn

The truth was, using the word 'sister' like I had in that sentence had made me want to puke. Milo hadn't been my sister since we were both only children running around with sticky fingers and big toothy grins, giggling at the small things that used to make life so pleasurable. But as we got older, I grew into someone completely different than her, and I grew into someone who was labeled as 'strange' and 'weird' and she became the apple of our parents' eyes. Even after my personality change (a great decision really, though not all that life affirming) they wanted nothing to do with me. All those years dressing in dark clothes made them believe I was not worthy of their time. They never said this, but I could see it in their eyes. I was a true disappointment. I shamed the family name.

Even now, dressed like a popular girl in pretty clothes and diamonds and light make-up, I meant nothing to them and they were not impressed by their eldest child. Instead their affection ran deep not for Adriana or for Darcy, but for the youngest and most promising - Milo. It had been a miracle that the Asyrian cult had found me because the everyday drudges that I had been enduring were nearly unbearable. The girls who had once been my sisters were now only strangers that I had to live with. My real family - my real Brothers and Sisters - lived hidden in the underground tunnels and abandoned warehouse, worshiping the dark and every monster that lived within it.

They had accepted me and all my so called 'flaws' with open arms. They loved the dark make-up and the dark clothes, preferring the romantic goths to any infidel who flashed her chest and giggled at every word a boy uttered. However, they did like my ability to be both. They needed someone like me, someone on both sides, and someone convincing of the act. And I was the Sister who could change the tide of the war. That's what it was after all - a war.

Asyria needed to rule, and anyone who could not see how good they were - how much nicer they were - compared to the judgmental oafs in this world of sunshine and sparkles, must be eliminated. (Though conversion is preferred sadly.) The members of Asyria were my family, not the Birchs. Not anymore. I had tried, I really had, but they only scorned me. But now the joke was on them because I was more powerful than any of them, and if it ever come down to it, I would not hesitate to kill them. All of them.

"I'm not entirely sure where I stand with Milo. I've been wondering whether I should go further with my relationship with her." And I'm not sure what it is - his words, his feelings, the way he sounds so sincere, the way he still hasn't killed me - but something inside me says I shouldn't try to ruin this, even if it means that Asyria cannot acquire a piece of raw and pure talent. (My childhood memories are getting in the way. I can picture when the four little Birch girls all got along, when we were all too young to understand how different we were.) Stupid memories. I even went through a long, hard initiation to rid myself of them! And yet here I am, feeling a primal twinge to protect the family that had written me off. I smile.

"So what you are saying is that you are ..." I have to swallow fear again as I reach out and run my finger slowly down his chest, afraid that he might snap my wrist. "Available?" I raise my eyebrows in questioning, though I'm not really expecting him to answer. Most guys I approach like this get so flustered that they begin to sweat and stutter a bunch of incoherent sentences. It's always a spectacle when this happens. I tend to draw a crowd. But no one is watching now - I could go as far as I wanted. Hmm. Now to find out how far he would let me.

I step close then, close enough that one slight movement would mean that we are touching. "Because if you aren't with her," I say, slowly reaching to his back pocket, praying he doesn't notice me reaching for the sharpened fingers he hid there. "Then you could most certainly be with me."

---

i’m faking glory
lick my lips, toss my hair
and send a smile over

[Cato]

Logan Blackmore

"Dialogue"
"Hearing"
Thoughts
Narration

"So what you are saying is that you are ... Available?" I can feel my heart beating much faster than it had been just a moment ago. This girl is running her finger slowly down my chest as she's saying this which only furthers my confusion. Where is Milo? I bet she set this up as some sort of test. If this is a test, then it's a tricky one to past. "I.... uh..." I try to clear my throat, but to no avail. This girl has me so flustered that she's rendered me incapable of coherent speech. It's so embarrassing not being able to talk to a girl, yet able to kill without hesitation. Now this girl takes another step closer toward me. We're so close that if I move even an inch we would be touching. As it is, I try to stand as still as possible. Our proximity only makes my heart beat faster.

"Because if you aren't with her," Oh no. I really hope she isn't about to utter the words that I am terrified to hear. I don't want to be told to leave Milo alone. We still have to fix things. No matter what this sister of hers speaks, I will not leave Milo alone. "Then you could most certainly be with me." She didn't utter the words I feared. She said something much worse. Be with her? Milo and I are on the verge of becoming a couple. I know Milo would kill me if I was to end up with her sister. This is definitely a test. I look at her sister only to decide that doing so is a mistake. She looks amazing that I won't deny, but I refuse to give her the acknowledgement. However, I am pretty shocked by her words. I can forget running. She's in control of this situation.

"Be...with...you?" Each word a struggle to get out. I don't know if they came out sounding hopeful or terrified. I do hope it's the latter. My eyes sweep over her which due to our proximity would have happened anyway. This girl looks... Damn it. I need to stop this! Milo is going to kill me if I do anything with her sister. I close my eyes to avoid looking at her sister. It's quite obvious that continuing to stare yes stare will only dig a deeper hole for me to crawl out of. My heart beat has slowed down enough for me to regain my senses a bit. I don't know what she might be doing. Keeping my eyes closed until she leaves will have to suffice. As if this encounter will end so easily. I'd love to leave now, but something tells me her sister has other things planned.

[arx!!]

eirwen birch

district 2 - eighteen - the devil's spawn

"Be...with...you?"

With his eyes closed, he doesn't get the chance to see me smile as I jump around him, grabbing the necklace that I found so interesting from his back pocket. And because I am already enjoying myself, I spin around and hold the knife to his throat and press my lips close to his ear with a smile. I haven't had this much fun in so long. It's refreshing to combine what I like best into one wonderful night: boys and knives. I giggle in his ear, holding the knife still enough that it doesn't cut him but close enough that if he chose to move it would be a rather painful experience for him. Can never be to sure what these Blackmore's got hidden up their sleeves.

"You shouldn't act like you wouldn't enjoy being with me." I whisper, still smiling as I speak. I run my free hand over his shoulder and down his bicep before jumping out of his reach quickly and nonchalantly beginning my examination of the knives that he wears around his neck. Without taking my eyes I drop to my knee, yanking up my pant leg and pulling my own hidden knife from its sheath. Act of good faith. That's what it is all about these days. I stand again slowly, holding my knife by the blade and offering the handle to him, turning my eyes back to him with a smile. "Not as interesting as your collection here," I say, bouncing the blade lightly in my palm, and jangling his necklace in the other. "But I could tell you some interesting stories if you wanted."

I've sharpened and cared for that blade ever since I received it as a gift for my 12th birthday. It was the highest quality tactical knife that my parents could find. Why they wasted it on me I am not all the certain, but one thing is certain: I will kill with and keep kill with this knife until the day I die. All the other knives I own may be high quality and of importance for my own protection, but this knife that i am offering to him is the one I care about - enough that I consider not letting him hold it! But it's really only fair that if I have his knives that he gets mine. Nevermind the fact that I have another blade hidden beneath my other pant leg ...

"So, tell me the story behind these fine works of art?" I say, stepping closer again, fairly certain that he isn't too angry to want to kill me. Hell for all I care we can go back to flirting because let's face it, I would sure love a piece of him. But something tells me all I will get out of him is the occasional smile or twinkle in the eye - he's attached to someone else, no matter how ... convincing I am.

---

i’m faking glory
lick my lips, toss my hair
and send a smile over

[Cato]

Logan Blackmore

"Dialogue"
"Hearing"
Thoughts
Narration

I can feel the necklace leave my pocket. Even worse, I feel a knife held up against my throat. This Birch now has the power to kill me. I let my guard down all because I'm distracted. Ripred help me if Milo was here. I'd be dead in a second if she was. She giggles in my ear which only serves to frighten me even more. I try to keep a poker face, but I don't know if it's very successful or not. I've never been in this position where my life hangs by a thread. I have to admit that this is whole new situation for me. I'm trying to figure out what I did to piss this girl off. Maybe she hates me for being too friendly with Milo? What a way to die. Not from the family members of people I've killed, but from a sister of someone I'm friendly with. Life is a silly game.

"You shouldn't act like you wouldn't enjoy being with me." Suddenly I feel very parched. I don't know how to respond to this statement. I'm very afraid to speak for fear my voice might... no! My voice will betray me if I speak. Milo will kill me, but I must admit her sister looks wonderful. I can feel my heart beat quicken a bit with her words. Despite how much I want to deny it, I know she's right. Still she won't ever get that out of me. I better say something though to avoid further embarrassment. "I.... don't know what you mean." What she does next sends a small shiver coursing throughout my body. Milo's sister runs her hand down my arm. I'm in a heap of trouble if Milo were to find out about this encounter. Thankfully her sister pulls a way leaving me some breathing room.

I see her drop to her knee and lift her pant leg up. I look away quickly before she notices me or so I hope. My eyes linger for a brief moment at her before uselessly scanning the alley. "Not as interesting as your collection here, but I could tell you some interesting stories if you wanted." I've been so focused on not looking at her that her voice startles me a bit. Now I see her holding a knife. I take the knife with some reluctance. This all could be a test. Killing me with my own knives would be an ironic death. "I'd love to hear the stories behind this well crafted knife ma'am." How stupid I sound. It's much too late to act like a gentleman. Unless this girl is stupid which I doubt she is, then my not so subtle staring must have gotten me caught.

"So, tell me the story behind these fine works of art?" Finally something to distract me from the mess that I've surely gotten myself into. I give a brief smile and take back my knives in exchange for the one she gave me. I point at one of the knives. "You see the knives here? I don't know if you noticed, but all of them are made up of bones. Human finger bones." I allow the pride to leak through into my spoken words. This necklace of mine is one of the few things I take pride in. Not to mention my other projects at home. "I even got a spear crafted out of human bone at my house. I'm sure you can guess how I've acquired such... trophies yes?" I didn't notice it until now, but she's closed the gap between us again. Suddenly my slow beating heart picks up the pace again with her proximity to me. Ripred help me.

[arx!!]

eirwen birch

district 2 - eighteen - the devil's spawn

"I'd love to hear the stories behind this well crafted knife ma'am." And I almost have to laugh at that last formality. Nothing about this conversation has been formal. And it has been quite a long time since I have been given any of that "respect" bullshit. I'm fairly certain that any good moral code has been eradicated in the human race and that respect disappeared with everything else good. So yeah, the soft spoken, confused, anxious, little "Ma'am," that rolls off his lips in the dark of the night catches me by surprise. Different.

Sadly, not in the good way.

Just another example of why he cannot be permitted to join Asyria. Too soft, even with those knives and viscous monster hidden somewhere - though right now I cannot see it - beneath the surface of this innocent boy. But as soon as we exchange knives once again, my own blade in my palm and his blades in his, I see a ghost of a smile fall across his face. It reaches into his eyes, making them glitter, like how a child looks at candy through a store window. A happy monster. I knew - just knew - it was hiding in there somewhere. He points to one of the knives. "You see the knives here? I don't know if you noticed, but all of them are made up of bones. Human finger bones."

In truth, I had noticed. That is why I had asked. They were crafted with such perfection, even lacking the steel needed to truly catch my eye. (Steel will always be better than bone in my eyes.) But as his eyes light up and the pride leaks into each of his words, I almost find myself being convinced otherwise. It makes him a lot more ... promiscuous. Whatever Milo sees in him, I am seeing it now. Not only is it fun messing with him as if he were a little boy caught doing something naughty, emphasis on "naughty" here people, it was fun listening to him as a grown up boy with muscles, chiseled jaw, and blood dripping from not only his hands, but his lips as well. Mmmmm. I nod and step closer.

"I even got a spear crafted out of human bone at my house. I'm sure you can guess how I've acquired such... trophies yes?" I nod, raising my eyebrows and looking into his eyes for a moment before raising my blade and twirling it between my fingers with a small smile. "Yes." I begin, reaching out with my left hand and pushing him against the wall before stepping close again with my knife at his neck. "I do have a few guesses." And I slide the tip of the knife slowly from ear to ear across his face, making sure not to cut him, only to demonstrate. "Tell me," I say, bringing the tip of my blade to my lips. "Do you like to hear them scream or are you merciful?" I my lip, letting it bleed for a moment before licking away the blood and wiping the knife at the bottom hem of his shirt.

"Because personally, I am all for the screamers. Much more fun."

---

i’m faking glory
lick my lips, toss my hair
and send a smile over

[Cato]

Logan Blackmore

"Dialogue"
"Hearing"
Thoughts
Narration

Her knife slides across my face ear to ear. A demonstration if that's what this is for she had the power to kill me. What a predicament I'm in. Let my guard down and this is the crap I get myself into. "Tell me. Do you like to hear them scream or are you merciful?" For a moment I don't quite pick up the meaning of her words until I realize she means the victims. At least that's my final conclusion to the words. Killing slowly appeals to me. Its always fun hearing a victim scream for mercy. Their cries for help falling on deaf ears. "Because personally, I am all for the screamers. Much more fun." Now that's interesting. Our preferences happen to be the same. We both like hearing our victims scream. Her proximity to me is making me both nervous about what could happen next and a bit excited about killing someone again.

"What a coincidence. I to love hearing the screams. It shows who's in charge." With the awkward proximity the words are more difficult to get out than they should be. I'm trying not to show it on my face that this is enjoyable. No telling if I succeed there. I try to comprehend what has happened since stepping in this alley. Falling for Milo's sister will definitely get me killed. Whether by said sister or Milo remains to be seen. Without a doubt Milo will know about this encounter one way or the other. Her wrath I fear more than anything. I'd rather not say anything about the encounter to her. Bringing it up now could also harm me. Perhaps by remaining silent about it, I will get lucky and Milo will never know what happened here.

"Tell me something. Are you afraid to die?" I grab her hand with the knife and thrust it at my throat. "I know I'm not." Well this is it. She will either spare me or my body will be found tomorrow with her long gone. She may even be the one to 'find' me. Oh how Aragorn will love hearing the news that I've died. With a sigh my hand reaches for one of my knives. I won't go down without a fight. Although I don't know if I can strike Milo's sister. Her beauty is magnificent. She probably knows or at least guesses how I feel. Hopefully my will isn't put to the test. Only minor flirting has happened. I'd be screwed if a hug or kiss were to happen. She would have me wrapped around her finger just like Milo. "What are you waiting for huh?"

[arx!!]

eirwen birch

district 2 - eighteen - the devil's spawn

"What a coincidence. I to love hearing the screams. It shows who's in charge."

Ah. Who would've known that this boy liked to be in charge? Mmm. I wasn't aware of it until just now, but I think those words made him even more desirable. Sure I fancy the occasional stuttering fool, those nerdy outcasts who remind me of myself in a past life, but ... gotta love a man who knows what he wants. His response, however, does bring that flicker of doubt into my head: Was this meeting a good idea? After all, this whole thing could be as much of an act on his part as it is on my part. Maybe I should be more careful ... More-

"Tell me something. Are you afraid to die?" His words cut me off and his sudden movement makes me flinch ever so slightly. The knife is pressed - hard - against his throat. And for a moment, I am fairly certain my eyes flicker with fear. But I compose myself quickly enough and replace the surprise with a playful smirk. This is when his words actually register in my mind, his question twirling around in my brain in some intricate waltz. Are you afraid to die?

Huh. Everyone fears the unknown, do they not? To say you do not fear leaving this world is nothing more than a bitter, wretched lie. I've had it drilled in my brain from infancy that to die is to become a failure. And that failing of course, is not an option. It's the career mindset. Win at all costs. Always win - cheat, steal, lie, connive - do whatever it takes to keep your honor and to survive. Surely this boy knows that, right? Death, for someone like me - for a Birch - is not an option.

"What are you waiting for huh?" And for a split second I actually consider it. But that was not my goal tonight. Actually, none of this was my goal but ... may as well keep going, right? No need to end the charade and flirtatious conversation now! The whole night is ahead of us ... so much time, so little space between us ... (Kind of a sweet quote for a not so sweet situation, huh?) I smile. One of those dazzling ones that I try to save for special occasions. Ah well, I guess this is special enough.

"I'm just waiting for you to scream." And with my free hand I use my thumb to trace the outer edge of his lip, still holding the knife close to his throat. I press my lips to his, softly mind you, with none of my usual ... vigor, and only for a rather long moment, before pulling away with a smile and dropping the knife from his throat. I step a good distance away, back into the shadows once again. "Unfortunately, I think I have had enough fun for one night." The words are a lie, but I can only figure it is for the best. Don't need my sister getting all jealous and digging into my life and where I go on my nightly travels.

"You could scream for more if you wanted though," I say. "A well-mannered lady like me would have to oblige."

---

i’m faking glory
lick my lips, toss my hair
and send a smile over

[Cato]

Logan Blackmore

"Dialogue"
"Hearing"
Thoughts
Narration

I was prepared for anything. Instead she kisses me. It only lasts for moment, but to me it felt more like an eternity. I don't know what will happen now. It would be a lie to say I didn't enjoy that kiss. "Unfortunately, I think I have had enough fun for one night." Unfortunately. About the only word that registers in my head. It really is unfortunate that the kiss didn't last longer than it did. I'm ashamed to even think about it, yet it was glorious. I better start preparing for my death considering Milo will find out about this one way or the other. If I tell her, she will kill me. If her sister tells her, I still die. No way out of this fiasco. Getting out of this situation unscathed will be tricky. Milo is the one for me, but part of me enjoyed what just happened. Someone help me.

""You could scream for more if you wanted though. A well-mannered lady like me would have to oblige." She must have scanned my face if those precise words just came out of her mouth. Its like she knows I want more. How do I respond without wrecking what I have with Milo? "I'm in trouble aren't I? If I want more which I don't." What a lie that is. I bet she can see through my façade so easily. "You could say no and run off to Milo. If I don't want anything else you still could rat me out." I'm very nervous right now. I'm extremely conflicted on what I want right now. Its like two halves of me are at war with each other. One side wants her and the other wants Milo. I'm positive there will be a murder soon. Question is how will I be killed? I doubt Milo will be merciful if she knew exactly how I felt about her sister.

Her wrath will be scary to behold. Its almost frightening how I landed myself in this situation. If I just kept on walking past this place none of this would have happened. Now I find myself in a life threatening situation. Milo's sister will definitely spill the beans about the kiss. Possibly even twist it to where I kissed her and not the other way around. I've prepared to be in the games. Prepared to fight to the death. I am so not prepared for a woman to yell their lungs off. I ran out on my family and do not intend to go back. Aragorn would kill me if I stepped back into that house. I am welcomed at Milo's place from what she told me, but not for much longer once she finds out. I will be looking for a new home soon enough.