Being Alone isn't a Crime (Poco+A_Million_Arrows)

[Arrows]

Lapas

Lucillian

D 1

Reality seemed to slip in and out of my heads as the time goes by. I begin to loose track of where I am but I always am able to bring myself back around to where I really am, the hospital. Though it doesn't feel like that though, no, it feels as though I am on a ship that is being thrashed upon by a massive storm. I grow more nauseous every second that goes by yet I am not even the real one sick here, my sister is. I most likely would have passed out by now drowning within my imaginary ocean if not for one thing. My anchor, the thing keeping me battened down to staying awake, Nico. Here I sit with her our hands locked as though a bomb could hit ending our lives any second.

Suddenly though her grasp vanishes and I panic for a moment. My head flies up from my knees and I look around in fear as if some feral demon was about to devour me. Instead however I see Nico crouching next to me and my pounding heart slows down as I slow my breathing down as well. I listen as she tells me she can run to her house to get me and my brother some food. That's when I realize how late it is and how inconveniencing this is for her, her family must be worried and she must be starving. "I am so sorry I didn't realize how late it was by all means go ahead and run home. If you want to bring me and my brother anything back go right ahead but take all the time you need." After that I don't want to make her feel bad so I stand up and make my way back into my sister's hospital room.

My brother is sitting in a chair with his head against a wall dreaming. He is lucky he can dream at a time like this. All I can do is fight to stay awake to try to out run the fear that surrounds me. However, it feels as if that fear as super powered turbines to fuel it and its gaining on me fast. I walk slowly over to my sisters bedside and sit back down in the chair I was in earlier. I kiss her head again then lock our hands together. "I will stay awake for you and I won't leave this room till you wake up I promise." I whisper to her as I sit there helplessly watching my sister battle with death in which only one can emerge the survivor.

[arya]

Nicolette "Nico" Berry
I felt bad for leaving, when I saw the disappointment in her eyes. I thought it was disappointment, at least. I wasn’t completely sure, but I still promised myself that I would hurry. I wouldn’t take more than 10 minutes. I’ll just run home. Running was good for me. Good training, and I had could take the physical challenge. I gave her a fast hug. “I’ll be back in 10, I promise” I told her, I didn’t know if it made her feel any better, but I had to try.

I started running, out of the hospital. People were staring, but I didn’t mind. I almost felt like I was flying down the street. Each step felt like I was going to leave this earth, and just fly away in the sky. That would have been amazing, flying. But I would still fly back to Lupas, because nothing could be better than having a friend. I just recently understood that, and I blamed myself for being a to big of a coward to ever have made any before. Maybe having friends in general wasn’t such a big accomplishment, maybe I just found a really good one. I enjoyed her company, I really did.

It didn’t take too long before I reached my house. After climbing the fence – the gate was to slow, I just pushed my two dogs back to make my way to the house. I usually stopped to pet them before going inside, but today there was no time. I stormed inside the house, and went directly to the kitchen. When I had open the fridge, picked up the pie, turned around I spotted him. My father, sitting in the kitchen. He was practically shaking with anger. He rose from the chair, smashing his fist into the table. It freaked me out. I suddenly felt terrified, and slowly started backing away from him. “How dare you question me, you silly little girl. How dare you disobey your own father?” He screamed. I never, never seen him this mad before. He started walking towards me. “Daddy, please. It’s my friend. Her sister is sick..” I mumbled, too scared to speak up. He didn’t care, I already knew it, but I had to say something. “You do not have friends, Nicolette. Nobody cares about you, nobody except for me. I have taken care of you your entire life. I have fed you, I have given you everything you could possibly have wanted, and most importantly I have provided you with a future. How dare you turn your back on me? How dare you throw away everything we have worked for?” He was still screaming, and slowly, slowly walking towards me. “But daddy no, I haven’t thrown anything away. I just made one friend. One friend. And I promise, it won’t get it the way of training.” He was still shaking with anger. I was shaking too, but not from the same reason. “You go to your room, I don’t want to hear about it” He smashed his fist into the table again. I had to swallow to even manage getting the words out. “No, daddy I’m going back to give Lupas and her brother some food. Her sister is very sick” I went over the line, and I knew it even before I said it. This wasn’t going to turn out very well, it never did. I suddenly fell to the ground, my face was burning with pain from the slap that just hit me. He was freakishly strong, but he never used his entire strength. I knew he wasn’t trying to hurt me, he never hit me more than once. Sometimes he felt bad about it, but not that often. He stepped over my body, and walked out from the kitchen. I just lied there for a moment, staring at the pie I dropped in the fall. It was completely ruined, and even if I was terrified, that’s what made me the most sad. The tears started running down my cheeks again. I was such a cry baby. I hurled into a little pathetic pile of human on the kitchen floor, before I decided to pull myself together.

I threw away the pie in the trashcan, since it was filled with glass from the broken baking dish anyways. We had to have something else, we always had leftovers in the fridge. I started searching the fridge, and manage finding a big box filled with some vegetarian soup. It’ll had to do. My mother always ate vegetarian, but I couldn’t manage the training without the protein. Among with the three bowls and spoons, I grabbed a loaf of bread to eat with the soup, and started sneaking out to the hallway.

In the mirror, I could see the red mark my fathers slap had left on my face. I didn’t care, I just had to make up an excuse so nobody would understand. I didn’t have the courage to sneak up into my room to get my make up, so I’ll just say something about that I felt. I grabbed my leather bag, and stuffed the box containing the soup and the bread inside it. Carefully, I put my sneakers on. I usually always wore high heels, but I had to be able to sneak well. When I gotten out to the street, I thought I made it. But I took one last look over my shoulder, and saw my father standing in the window. It was too late anyways, so I started running.

I reached the hospital very fast, since I was running a lot better in my sneakers. When I finally found Lapas sisters room, I carefully opened the door. I nodded politely against her brother, before turning to her. “I’m sorry it took a while. I brought some soup and bread” I started unpacking at a little table in the corner of the room. I felt weird being inside there, like I was intruding somehow. After unpacking, I sat down next to Lupas. “You have to tell me if you want some privacy, I don’t mind. But I really don’t mind staying either. I’ll be here as long as you want me to” I smiled friendly, before taking a look at her sister. Poor little girl.

[Arrows]

Lapas

Lucillian

D 1

Every second feels like an eternity as I sit here with my sister. Every time her heart rate spikes feels as though someone is stabbing my heart. As I look at my dear beloved sister I find it hard to breathe and tears well into my eyes. She is so pale as if the life within her has slowly drained away. The most disturbing thing of all though has to be the way her skin feels like ice. If it wasn't for the small rising and falling of her chest I would think she was dead. Then my mind takes control and I am thrown into another alternate scenario. This time I am dressed in black crying on my brother's shoulder as the anthem of Panem plays as my dear sister is lowered down into the ground. The last glimpse of her I see is the edge of her black and gold coffin.

I am shot back to real life as I hear the door close and I see Nico standing there. She has food in her hands and it looks as though she has been hit. I don't know why I react so much to the mark on her face but I do, maybe it is because it gets my mind off my sister. "Oh my God Nico your cheek!" I stand up and rush over to her. She tries to give me the food and I thank her as I set it down on a nearby table. Then I grab an ice bag which I hand to Nico. "Keep that on your cheek and sit down. By the way you better me what happened and no lying." I walk over and plop down in my seat then I tap on the chair next to me signaling for her to sit there.

[arya]

My heartbeat finally settled down from all the running, and I could finally relax. I leaned back into the chair i was sitting in and crossed my legs. At last, I noticed that my cheek was still burning, but not that badly. I guess I've been to busy to think about it. Lapas handed me a bag of ice, that I held against the mark on my cheek. "Keep that on your cheek and sit down. By the way you better me what happened and no lying." She told me. I felt a little bit busted, because I was just about to start lying to her. I couldn't do that. But I could always tell her a different truth. "Oh no, thats nothing. Don't worry about it. It's not important right now" I told her, which I really believed. When her sister was lying in a hospital bed, fighting for her life she didn't need anything else to worry about. And it didn't even hurt that badly, honestly. My training is basically being hit and hitting, so I was used to the pain. My father didn't abuse me. He gave me a slap once in a while when I deserved it, but he would never harm me, not for real. It wasn't like I was scared he was going to kill me, so it didn't really matter.

What really scared me was what was going to happened when I had to get back home. I rather stay in that hospital for the rest of my life, to be honest. He was probably not going to hurt me, but words could hurt just as bad. How could I be this rebellious? Not following my fathers rules, it was so unlike me. I never did anything like this before, not even as a child. I always followed rules, that was kind of my thing. It was weird, but it felt good somehow. Like I finally dared standing up for myself. Even if I was sneaking behind his back, I finally took my life into my own hands. I needed that. I needed to be independent for the first time in my life. I did good, I think.

[Arrows]

Lapas

Lucillian

D 1

I listen as Nico tells me her cheek is fine and that I don't really need to worry about it. However, I know that in fact I do need to worry for more reasons than one. The first obvious reason is she is my friend and if she is hurt as her friend I need to worry about her. The second reason is slightly more selfish however. I want to devote all my attention and focus onto her to keep my mind of my sister. In truth, my head has been spinning so much about my sister it is beginning to hurt. So all I want to do is latch onto anything and everything that will keep my mind off of her. As of right now Nico's injured and red cheek is that exact and perfect thing to drag me away from my darkened thoughts.

As I look at her cheek I notice that it really was quite red and swollen. My eyes narrow in suspicion as I begin to doubt she had fallen as she said she did. However, I don't want to blurt straight out she was a liar so instead I tread around it and poke questions. "So you said you fell, where did you fall and what on?" I add a slight edge to my voice to show my aroused suspicion but not too much for it to be blatantly obvious to her. She has to figure out that I believe she isn't telling me the truth.

Most people wouldn't be so annoyed by such small lies, but I am. I am very prone to annoyance when people lie to me due to my past. My mother would always tell my father about how much she loved and took care of us. But i knew it was never true she was just lying to his face so she could stay with his wealth. Also my brother use to lie nonstop and it took me forever to break that habit out of him. So needless to say I am highly annoyed with the whole concept of lying, I mean I don't even lie myself. Except for one time when I was eleven and my brother would have gotten in huge trouble if I didn't lie, but that is another story. As for now I sit in the hospital room watching Nico waiting to see why she appears to be lying to me.

[arya]

I felt ashamed for lying, how could I do that to her? But how could I even tell her the truth? My father doesn't want me to hang out with you, so he punched me in the face. She would never want to see me again if i told her what I came from. Maybe I could change the truth, into another truth. Yes, I wouldn't be lying, just leaving some details out. "I'm sorry I lied to you but you can't tell anyone. My family's pride is so important to my father, and he would literally kill me if he knew I told you" I suddenly got silence. Why did I even tell her that? I couldn't take it back now. I had to continue. I couldn't leave it hanging in the air like that. "He got upset and worried because I didn't arrive home in time. It doesn't even hurt, I swear by it" I tried to smooth things over. It actually didn't hurt anymore, so at least that wasn't a lie.

"But honestly, it really doesn't matter. It sounds a lot worst than it was." I didn't even know if I was making it any better, but I had to. I really didn't want her to worry, she had enough on her mind already. I nodded against the food and smiled slightly, "Don't you want to eat?" I asked her, mostly to change the subject away from me. It wasn't that much that I didn't want to tell her, but this was hardly the right time. I didn't want to upset her by lying either, because she really seemed upset. She already knew I was lying, I was sure of it. I'm a terrible liar, and it doesn't even look like the mark of a fall.

[Arrows]

Right now as I sit here next to Nico I find my body very tense along with my knuckles white from grasping the edge of my chair so hard. I feel as if I am standing on a glass room over a long and deadly cliff drop and we every movement I make the glass cracks. I even catch myself hardly daring to breathe and when I do it is a short light breath. I wonder if this is how my beloved sister feels right now locked within her own consionce. I wish that I could take a sludge hammer and break her glass chamber letting her fall back into my arms. However, I can't she is fighting in a fight that she must win on her own now. 

Yet again I am thrown into a vivid dream of her being lowered into the Earth within a black midnight coffin. Shivers race down my spine and create goosebumps all along my skin. It feels as if a thousand needles are rising out of my skin as a dark thought passes through my head. What if this reoccurring dream is insight to the future; that my sister is doomed to die and she will lose this fight with her mind. My body is now trembling fiercely and I have no more control to stop it. I want to scream and run away from this nightmare but I can't it is my prison as well as hers. 

My sister could lose herself during this fight but she isn't the only one who is fading away right now. I can feel that within my own spirit that I myself am slipping away to a place unknown. Like a ship caught within a heavy current one that threatens to sink the ship to the bottom of the sea. Why I'm heading this way I don't know, but my guess is that losing my sister is sending me to hell. The vibrant little girl I raised dying here with me and knowing I can do nothing to save her is just as powerful as an axe chopping off a head. In some casinarios I wish I could face the axe, it would be faster with almost no suffering. 

My dreams began to die away and I am returned yet again to what I believe is reality. I notice Nico looking at me quite nervously and who can blame her? Truthfully I feel like a mutt one created by someone thrown into an arena of life. In is arena all I can do is fight for survival and hope to live another day.

My node twinges as a delightful scent intrigues and taunts it. My tongue glides over my lips in anticipation as I see Nico holding some sort of soup. My stomach clenches at the sight of the soup since I have always loved soup. Soups have so many different varieties and they are all so different. Every batch is different from the next even if it's the same kind of soup, just like humans, just like me. I smile graciously to Nico as I take the food, "thank you so much you are a savior."

However, before I dive into the soup myself I walk over to my brother. He is still sleeping against the wall in a chair and I hesitate before waking him. He is so peaceful when he is sleeping unlike when he is awake and moving. Whenever awake he is only ever gracious and obsessed with the Hunger Games. In fact, I would wager he is dreaming about the 67th Hunger Games which now linger around the corner. My jaw clenches as I finally decide to wake him and I shake his knee softly.

His eyes flutter awake as he stirs from his deep sleep, "Hey Nico brought us some soup to share have some." I whisper gently to him as a mother would do when waking her own child. "oh thanks Lapas." he says kindly as he takes several sips of the soup then returning it to me. Next he stands up and heads to the door and just before living he says, "Oh and thank you Nico. Also I'm going to run to the bathroom real quick." I nod as he leaves then go back next to Nico and sit down into my electric chair. It's electric since it has been the home of my torture for these last few hours.

I begun to sip lightly on the soup and it's amazing truly splendid. Suddenly though cold flares through my body and the soup flies to the floor as my hands spasm. What the hell is happening! My mind is racing as my entire body begins to seizure without my consent and I can't even scream! Suddenly blackness engulfs me into its dark and chilling abyss and one thought flares into my head. The girl in the coffin might be me... Oh Nico help me if you can I don't want to die!

[arya]

Thankfully, she didn't seem to pay any attention to the fact that my father had punched me. Honestly, that didn't suprise me. It was probably really common here in the District. Maybe her father did it too. It didn't matter. I just felt relieved to have confessed my lies, and still not have to make a scene about it. She was starting to look kind of pale. I was getting more and more worried about her. The problem was that I couldn't really relate. I never had anybody I cared about that much. Ofcourse, I do care about my parents. Not in that way though. I felt ashamed over even having those thoughts, but the truth was I didn't care about them as much like Lupas cared about her sister.

"Oh, no problem" I told Lupas brother, as a response when he thanked me for the soup. My mind started swaying off again, and I started wondering what it would be like to have a sibling. I always wanted a sister, a younger one. By my observations, siblings always seemed to protect eachother against their parents. I would have liked somebody to team up with, especially through my childhood. But what did I know? I had no idea, no experience at all in having siblings. The closest I've ever been was my cousins that I never talk to. They live in the same district but our fathers hate eachother. My uncle resent my father for raising me as a career. He strongly disagrees with the games, and cannot forgive his brother for wanting his own daughter to die for the capitol. Somewhere in my mind, that seems logical.

From nowhere, Lupas drops her soup on the floor. I snap out of my daydreaming, at the exact right moment to see her start seizuring. I just froze. I just stood there for a few seconds, a few long seconds staring at her. I didn't understand what was happening. What was happening to her? Was it a panic attack? I threw myself down next to her, and bended up her jaws with my hands. Did Lupas have that disease, epilepsy? I started panicking. This was not something that I could handle. I remembered vaguely something about that you had to keep the person from chewing on their tounge. How did I do that? I started screaming, just outload for somebody to help me. I had to act, and I had to act quickly. I bended my finger, two of them and put it in between Lupas teeth. Shit, that hurt badly. Maybe I should but something else in so she didn't bite my fingers out? There was no time. I pulled the kitchen towel I wrapped the bread in from the table. After rolling it up into a little hard ball, I let the towel take over the place between Lupas teeth from my fingers. She could still breath right? I had to check her breathing, but she couldn't suffocate, because she had her noose to breath through right? She seemed to be breathing, just not in a normal tempo. "NURSE, NURSE, NUUUURSE!!" I screamed, as loudly as I possible could.

[Arrows]

Lapas

Lucillian

D 1

I feel weak, absolutely powerless as my body spasms and convulses. Through the distortion I hear a scream, Nico's I believe but there is no way to be sure. All I am sure about is now I have to fight for my life. I can't leave my family, they need me more than anyone. I am the support that everyone leans on, even my mother and she doesn't even realize it. Through the cold of darkness I try to urge myself towards where the light is, where my loved ones are. The number one thing bothering me though is I didn't even get to say goodbye to anyone, not even Nico who was beside me this entire time and probably still is.

Then as if an angel has come to save me from this eternal darkness light swells into my eyes. I begin to lift my eye lids slowly for they feel as heavy as fifty pound weights. Slowly the image of life returns to my frail electric blue eyes and I find myself with a small hospital bed. I turn my head slowly to see an IV drip along with a heart monitor connected to me. The heart monitor begins to race as fear and curiosity pulse through my blood. How long was out? It felt like only seconds but for all I know it could have been months! I try to call out to someone but all the comes out of my mouth is a soft gutteral sound. I am completely helpless and now here I am awake and no one is here not even Nico. Nico! I wonder what happened to her or what even happened to me.

I hear the doorknob begin to turn and the monitor begins to beep rapidly again as fear of who it could be shoots through my head. I decide to close my eyes to just slits while watching the door just in case its someone I don't wish to see. When the door finally opens my eyes fly open as my mouth drops at who I see in the doorway. Tears spring to my eyes as my precious little sister walks in. I attempt to call her name but to no prevail again but I don't need to her eyes lock with mine and she races to me. She hugs me crying "Lapas... I didn't know if you were gonna wake up.. Mama didn't think you would.. but I never stopped believing.

I am happy hugging my sister but my stomach twists at something she said, Mama didn't think you would. Why am I it surprised that wrecked witch wanted her dead from the beginning and this just proves it. I hug my sister tighter as anger boils my blood but my sister just thinks its me embracing her. After a long period of embracing each other we separate and I finally regain my voice to weakly ask her how long I was out. She tells me about a week and a half then I ask her hen she woke up and she replied a few hours after I went under. It is almost cruel, exchange of one sister for another, however, I received my wish. To let me fight with death instead of her and sure enough I survived to live another day.

That's when Nico returns to my mind and I ask her to go find her for me and to tell her I'm awake. She nods then runs off into the district. She is so young but so independent just like I was at that age, in fact she is a lot like me. However, I am determined not to let her grow up to fast like I had to. Butterflies flurry within me at the thought of her having to become like me and it almost makes me sick. No one should ever have to live the life I do, never.

[OOC- There is a week and a half time gap so feel free to fill that in your story any way you would like ]

[arya]

Minutes had suddenly turned into hours, and hours into days. Not a single second, not even in the time I'd spent sleeping, that feeling of missconfort had ever left my stomach. I had been painting, constantly from the moment I had been driven away from the hospital. Only family allowed, they told me. I could only find one way to express the concern that never seemed to leave. I was so worried for her. For Lapas, my only friend. My room had been filled with all of these paintings. Of Lapas, of her sister and her brother. Of her in a the hospital bed, connected to all of those tubs. I had tried to go see her, but my father wouldn't let me out of the house. I had tried escaping, but he had caugt me every single time. I couldn't find a single way to escape the prison my father had created in my own house. I had been crying, screaming and breaking things in the house. Nothing seemed to work. I spent sleepless nights trying to escape, but that man seemed to be everywhere.

I sat in my window, painting when I saw her. A little girl, Lapas in a smaller package you could say running towards my house. A sudden happiness filled my body. That worrying feeling that wouldn't leave my body was finally realesed. I just knew it. She had woken up. In seconds, I pulled on a lovely pink dress and a pair of high heels. I runned down the stairs, and towards the door. Somebody grabbed me, I didn't have to look to know who. "Release my hand!" I yelled, as I tried to escape his handle on my wrist. "Young girl,you are not going anywhere" he said. "Try to stop me!" I yelled at the same time as I manage breaking loose. I runned out the door and smashed it in his face. I hugged Lapas sister, I couldn't help myself. "I'm so glad that you are both fine" I told her, before she even got to speak. "We have to run" I realized how weird that must have sounded, but I started running towards the hospital.

I almost jumped into Lapas bed when I finally entered her room. I gave her a long, hard hug. "I am so undescribably happy that you woke up. This passed week has been insane. Don't you ever do that again" I couldn't help it, a tear escaped my eyes and streamed down my face. She still looked sick somehow, maybe it was the hospitol and the tubs that was connected to her, but it seemed wrong somehow. She should be happy and smiling, not sick like this. "I'm sorry I haven't been here to see you. My father locked me into the house, I couldn't escape. I'm so sorry" I told her