Seven seconds til I hit the ground [Jem/Glitz blitz]

[pthalorarity]

I live my life inside a dream,
only waking when I sleep
If I could sell my sorry soul, I would have it all

I smile to myself as I wait for my family to come say their goodbyes. Finally, I’m going to be free. I can’t help but feel a tugging at my heart though when I think of saying goodbye to Glitz. I know I’ll see her again soon, and I sure as hell don’t want her in that arena with me. But still… something isn’t entirely right about saying goodbye to her. Since she’s been born, we’ve never been apart for more than a day. I’m not sure what a world where I can’t talk to her daily is like, but there’s nothing I can do to stop that now. I don’t think I want to either. Still if there is one person I love more than anything in this world it is her and I don’t want to say goodbye.

Mother and father come in first of course. Dad has always been a man of few words and he remains so now. I can see that he is proud, though the edges of his eyes are tinged with worry and I cannot be fooled. My mother is another story entirely. Of course she is beaming, but from the moment she entered she began barking out orders and suggestions for my portrayal on television. As if I hadn’t been planning this for years; I know what I’m doing. As I hug them both farewell, I say a silent prayer that the antics of my sexual activity does not fall upon their ears in my absence. I’ve laid the groundwork for the glamorous life ahead of me and I am not about to let some scandal ruin me now. Hopefully I can count on Kohl to squash any of that. I wonder for a moment if he will come to send me off, but before I give it much thought the door is opening again and their she stands. My best friend. My sister.

The tugging at my stomach folds into a full knot and I don’t know why, because this goodbye is only temporary. My eyes begin to ache with an all too familiar sensation and I demand them to stop as I maintain my ever-present smirk of confidence. “Don't miss me too much while I’m gone, alright?”

[✨ zozo.]

Who knew that three syllables could make me the happiest and saddest sister alive?

"Jem Morgan!"

Yes! I had thought in an instant - my brother off to claim his crown. A smile had burst forth from my mouth and I cheered in delight, applauding his heightened celebrity status.This was a chance to prove we were more than just the Mayor's children. This was his chance. (I never bothered the spotlight much but often I wondered about Jem. Did he ever grow tired of the questions, the cameras, the endless nagging?) And I am proud to call him my brother.

But, oh, I thought after. What if he doesn't come back?

And the thought is stupid and silly so I cast it aside. Of course he will come home. Career, District One's Mayor's Son, our good genes - how could he not? Long will he reign beside the other Victors. I never lie to anyone but myself so I pretend I'm speaking to the entire world when I say I have every bit of confidence he will come home. Faith in him, yes. But faith in the Games - well, I'm not so sure.

Momentary celebration is put on hold as I am practically flung forward by my friends towards the Justice Building, pattering up the steps two at a time. Nerves and joy collide in my stomach and a hundred thoughts clatter in my brain - what if, what if, what if? It takes all my strength to march on - I've got to have faith. I've got to keep on believing in him each step of the way. (But if I'm honest, I've never stopped.)

“Don't miss me too much while I’m gone, alright?”

I fold my arms and smirk. "You? Never." Keeping a straight face is usually my forte but I feel silly acting cold (I could never lie to Jem, not ever) and find myself laughing, flinging my arms around him into a hug. I'm proud of you balances between my teeth but it doesn't seem right: like something our parents would say. Instead I choose "I'll see you soon enough. I'll blink and you'll be back."

My brother, my best friend, the one person I'm not quite sure I could live without. I pray for both our sakes he comes back in one piece and with a beating heart.

glitz morgan

[pthalorarity]

I live my life inside a dream,
only waking when I sleep
If I could sell my sorry soul, I would have it all

The small laugh that escapes my lips sounds forced. I hope Glitz fails to notice, but she knows me well enough. Perhaps she’ll spare my feelings and ignore it all the same. “Yeah, I know,” I reply with ease. “And things will be different when I get back. They’re going to be better, for both of us.” I smile at the thought of the two of us no longer under the roof of our overbearing stage mother. The weight is still in my chest though, and it pulls me toward her. I wrap my arms tightly around her in a pure embrace only known to my sister.

“I promise to still talk to you when I’m famous,” I joke as I lay my head on top of hers. I’m hoping that all of the things I would say to her should this be the last time we speak are some how entering her mind telepathically. We might as well have been twins the way we were connected, but I’m still too afraid to say it all out loud. Then it would become real. The doubt would be real, and I can’t accept that. I’m about to get everything I’ve ever wished for, although it is funny how careful we are supposed to be about that sort of thing…