You May Be Gone But Your Love Is Eternal (May's Funeral)

[Arrows]

I Will Remember You

Ice, freezing cold, it spreads through her body like a wildfire engulfing her. Her entire body seems to be shutting down throwing her into an abyss, an abyss of grief. Her legs crumble beneath as she stands in her classroom. Her knees slam into the floor just as her beloved sister May's body hits the ground. She remembers first meeting May after they found each other again. She was so strong and so brave, but now she was dead signaled by the firing of a canon. Then came the pain, as if that canon had shot straight through her chest. Her eyes began pouring a cascade of tears down her cheeks. All she could think through it all was... May... May... May... come back.

However, that was several days ago now but she still felt the same. Still lost in a world of grief, still bleeding from the canon wound. Yet her tears had stopped falling mostly because she had none left to fall. Her entire body felt numb or weak as she feebly rose from her bed and scuttled over to her closet. The moment she slid open it's doors she regretted it, for there hanging in front of her eyes was a single black dress. It wasn't fancy but it was the color required, the color of misery and death. She reached out a hand and slowly ran it down the length of the dress. A knot began forming in her throat at the thought of her sister waiting for her in a coffin. Her face twisted as if she had eaten a very rotten piece of something and her stomach felt that way as well. She shakes her head vigorously before grabbing the dress and slamming the closet shut.

As she slides the dress onto her it all feels wrong, not like it was on backwards, but evil. Black was a color of death, defeat, and most of all darkness. Wearing this short black dress on the day of May's funeral was all to wrong because all those things are so opposite of May. She was always so bright, confident, beautiful, and most of all filled with hope and bravery. Yet by wearing this dress she feels as if she is personally saying screw it to all the May was and forever will be in her memory. She wants to rip this dress of the devil off and set it to fire and put on a bright vibrant dress, however, she knows she can't since she doesn't own any. With a sigh she looks at herself in her small cracked mirror, even she looks wrong in black. It was a color she always refused to admit was there, a color she said she would never wear yet now here she was.

No longer standing to look at her defeat she turned away from her mirror and put on her small black heeled shoes. They were way too big for her small petite feet but she couldn't complain since they belonged to her neighbors. Alas there was one more thing to put on before leaving. Carefully and almost fearfully she approached a small white box sitting next to her bed where she left it. Her heart was now hammering in her chest and her hands quivered as they clicked the box open. As soon as she did she regretted it as a new wave of remorse drowned her. For sitting inside the lovely white box was her one last true piece of May, a small slightly rusty necklace with a small sun on it. As she lifted it into her hands they shook even more violently and she didn't realize how hard she was biting her lip until blood sprang forth and tainted her mouth. Taking a long and hard breath she slowly but surely put the necklace on then she whispered in a very minute voice, "Now you will always make my day brighter May. And I will never take it off."

Not wanting to waste any more time she left her room and her small rickety house in general. Yet as she trudged down the long cracked and weed infested path towards the cemetery she veered off and headed towards a small path of flowers. Seeing all of the warm and bright colors made her smile for the first time in weeks. She then preceded to drop to her knees and pick one flower in particular, a pink rose. As she held it in her arms the memories began to flock into her head from miles around. The one that most caught her attention was how it was pink roses that her and her sisters had laid on their mother's grave so many years ago. She tenderly lifted the flower to her nose and inhaled it's sweet fragrance allowing her self to get lost for a few short moments. Yet as she knows all times of happiness always end, so she rose to her feet and continued her deathly journey.

As she entered the small and quite spooky cemetery she wanted to turn and run. But today she couldn't, today she had to be strong for May. Today she had to say farewell to her sister, and one of her best friends. With a pang of sadness but also relief she discovered there was little to no one present. In a way she was hurt about how little people cared about May. Yet in another she was indeed relieved at the fact that no one important was here to see her emotional wreck that was sure to come. As she approached the on grave stone freshly dug with a coffin open above it and several candles around the ground. Her feet began to tremble ferociously as she approached the final resting place of her sister.

Her feet finally halted before the lonely coffin with following delinquently inscribed upon it. May Rhodes 16 years old Tribute of the 67th Hunger Games. Her fists tightened in anger at the Capitol for having to add the part about her being a tribute. Did it honestly matter? We all know what happened to her. She died because of them plain and simple. She began taking deep breaths to calm down because today was about May not about the monsters in the Capitol. Taking one last look up at the sky she took a small step forward and looked down at May. Her heart froze at the scarring sight before her. Her normally friendly and warm sister was now grey and cold. Now the tears had began to fall and some even sprinkled onto the coffin below her. What was even more disturbing to her was the fact the Capitol had fixed all the wounds before sending her back here.

With tears cascading down her face and her legs threatening to give way any given moment she lifted her flower up. Now came the hard part, the part she knew she had to do. She reached down and opened up May's frozen hands and quickly placed the flower in them before shutting them again. Still shaking and still crying she leaned forward and softly placed a kiss on May's forehead before whispering "Thank you for loving me. And I want you to know I will never forget you... Also can you say hi to mom for me? Thanks May, you're the best sister ever." Then it all just was too much, the world had come crashing down on her head as she stumbled back from her sister's coffin. And finally she fell to her knees wailing as she buried her face in her hands. Kneeling here she finally knew, no matter what she does death and darkness will always follow me. It was the life that she, June Rhodes, would have to live with and now she wished she could be it's next victim.

 Words:1306
Other:R.I.P MAY RHODES 

Template credit to the amazing Kire

[Knuckles]

WOULD YOU KNOW MY NAME
If I saw you in Heaven?
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Normal day activities became impossible for him. Eating, sleeping, breathing. He wanted to stop, to fall over dead, but he couldn't because of the two words he said. I promise. His heart broke like a mirror being shattered into a million pieces with shards flying every direction so it was beyond repair. Fire pulsed throughout his body replacing the joy that once lived in his life. I promise to watch after June. I promise to tell April it wasn't her fault. I promise. The promise was one he didn't want to keep. Sammy wished he would fall over dead in his sleep so he could go away from the horrible life the Capitol placed in front of him. He thought it was fun and amazing, but after witnessing the death of May, his view changed. He watched the tribute gain up on her like nothing was wrong. Several others stood around, but they attacked her. They killed her out of cold blood because their lives were more important. She was meant to come home alive, but she's coming home in a coffin. Cold, pale, stiff, dead. They killed her so they could live, but every last one of them died, and watching them fall was sweet, sweet revenge.

His heart pounded inside his chest begging him to move as the drum echoed throughout his head, but he didn't want to. The covers shielded his body against the weight of the world; he was comfortable, and he didn't want to move. A war raged inside his home as his mother forced him into life. She brought him into the kitchen trying to figure out what was wrong with him, but she'll never understand. She'll never understand the feeling of being helpless when someone is screaming for help, or when someone is dying and a damn thing couldn't be done to save them. Roars echo inside his ears as they ran away from the horrible thing. They flew away leaving her to die alone because the selfishness living inside each of their souls. His mother tossed questions at him constantly, but his answer never changed. I promise. I promise. I promise.

("Sammy what are you doing?")

("I made a promise.")

Fire danced in front of his eyes like stars pouring down from the sky in the middle of the night forming a show for everyone to enjoy only Sammy wasn't enjoying it. He hated everything right now. May was strong, and she fought well, but it wasn't enough to bring her home because she was murdered. The sound of his feet pounding against the floor was muted as his mother's shouts called him back into the kitchen. He stood in front of his mirror making sure he looked nice and clean because he was going to pay his respects to May Rhodes. June Rhodes became his friend shortly before she was reaped, and Sammy promised he would take care of her. He promised April he wouldn't leave June even in the midst of the storm that passed over them right now. The rain fell down upon them drenching their clothes as they fought to find the break in the clouds for the sun to peak through, yet the clouds were too thick. The rain was too heavy. The storm was too strong.

His mother demanded him to turn around at once, but her wish wasn't going to be granted. Sammy marched out of the house dragging his foot against the ground leaving a trail behind him. The black on his shoe etched a path into the road leaving a trail for him to follow. Tears formed in his dark brown eyes. I will not cry. I will not cry. They didn't obey his command as they fell down his face freely. He loved the Capitol because they loved him. He trusted them because they were deserving of his trust, yet it was wiped away the moment the lightning struck the ground. He hated them. The Capitol was deserving of death for causing so much destruction upon every district in the nation. Innocent children walked into the games every year, but only one walked out alive. Innocent children became murderers for the laugh of the Capitol, and Sammy wasn't going to stand around and watch anymore. He hated everything about them.

He pushed through the gate of the small cemetery where everyone of the tributes were laid to rest. His heart leaped into his throat in a quick moment making it impossible to breath sucking the life out of him. Some of the graves were better kept than others, but that wasn't what mattered. Sammy wasn't the first one in the cemetery; June was already there. She was knelt down beside the coffin which only caused his fragile heart to shatter into many more pieces. He quickly wiped the tears away before heading over towards her. I promise. His legs shook under the weight of his body as he stood back for a moment staring. Never in his entire life had he been so close to a grave before especially one that wasn't buried. He inhaled sharply as he moved over towards her fighting to keep the tears from flowing down his face. Strength was needed to day to hold the world up off her shoulders, and that's what he was good at.

May Rhodes 16 years old Tribute of the 67th Hunger Games.

The words etched into the wood was the constant reminder of her fate the Capitol placed upon her. A weight was added against the world he was desperately trying to hold up.

He
was
falling.

He placed a hand upon her shoulder allowing her to know he was there, but he didn't say a word; instead, he stood silently as tears rolled down his face. I promise. I promise. I promise.

WORDS COUNT 971
STATUS finished
NOTES R.I.P May Rhodes
MUSIC Tears in Heaven - Eric Clapton
CREDIT MADE BY CC! OF CAUTION 2.0.

[arya]

step by step heart to heart left right left we all fall down like toy soldiers bit by bit torn apart we never win but the battle  wages on,  for toy soldiers

APRIL RHODES I'm supposed to be the soldier who never blows his composure even though I hold the weight of the whole world on my shoulders Her sister were yet not to be buried in another few hours, yet it seemed unlikely that the wreck of girl lying in her bed would even manage stepping out of her bed. It had only been a few days since the news came from the capitol, or to be completely correct the news did not really arrive as much as they had arrived tumbling like a storm from a wide-screened television. The death of her beloved sister had come to crush the entire essence of Aprils soul and already scattered heart into the state of nothingness it seemed to reached by now. It had been as if the knowledge of her sister death had been the last pain she could handle, the last drop to tip over the goblet.  The little shed she was living in wasn’t much to look at, just two room and the almost dilapidated walls made it seem like it could fall apart any second now. It was located in the backyard of one of those big houses with the green lawns in the more privileged part of the town. The owners of the shed had more or less neglected its whole being, and neither had they shown much interest in the young girl renting it. But, even to her landlords, this seemed to be a day of exceptions. One does not simply ignore that the girl living in their yards is supposed to enter her sister funeral this particular day. Noticing that April had not yet left the shed since her torturing news arrived, her lady landlord had taken the time and freedom to wake her up.  April heard the knock against the wooden door very clearly, since she did not sleep. It had seemed horribly tempting to do so, but each second she spent closing her eyes seemed even worse than the torture she suffered through awake. She had been commuted back and forth between total lack of sleep, and spending most of her days hours in unconsciousness . The dreams haunting her by night didn’t only contain brutal images of her sister being murdered, but also the reliving of her death over and over again. In most dream, her sister was alive and well, but sooner or later she was to re-experience her death. Even in the dreams May did not die, she had to wake up once again to realize the harsh truth. Despite the high price sleep seemed to cause her, when it was too much to bare it could seem almost tempting. At times, she even seemed to grow addicted to the sleep. She could see her again, experience the early memories she shared with her sister, laugh with her and hug her. But as the consciousness pulled her back, the grief once again took her into its dark arms. The pain had been eating her alive, mixed with the guilt that never seemed to leave her mind, she was incapable of living. When she heard the knock, she did not rise to open. Just the bare thought of Junes disappointed eyes was enough for her to cry out in pain. Each and every time the thought of her younger sister entered her mind, it felt as if the shadows of her guilt were to grab her entire body and just squeezed it until there was nothing left to squeeze. At the time being, she did not only fight the grief of losing a beloved one, but also the shame and the dark ghost of guilt seemed to be following her footsteps closer than ever. If she just had the guts to step up for her, this would never have happened. If she was brave like May, she would be the one in the coffin. The words constantly repeated themselves in her brain, it should have been her. She had pledged her life to defending her sisters, swore an oath to herself to always be their guardian and she had failed in the worst way possible. The weight of the world were resting on her shoulders, as she pulled the blanket over her head in an effort to block the universe out of her mind.  The lady landlord entered the shed uninvited. Even if the sun had risen long ago, the room was still dark due to the large blankets covering the windows. “A..april?” A unsecure, almost scared voice spoke up and broke the silence. Suddenly, April sat up. Her breathing grew faster and louder, as she was rocking her body back and forth, hugging herself with her arms. The landlord carefully stepped in to the room, almost as if the floor was made or glass, or as if she was simply scared of the young girl in her bed. “Mays.. funeral is today” Just the sound of her name made April cry out in pain but the sound coming from her throat wasn’t as much a cry. She didn’t scream nor cry, the sounds she was making were just sorrow filled moans expressing her agony. As she kept rocking her body back and forth while staring into the wall, the lady landlord realized that the young girl could never managed this by herself. As expected, it was not April herself that rose to the occasion, acted like an adult and got dressed for her sister funeral. It was the lady landlord who basically lifted her out of bed and pulled the black, oversized dress her own daughter had borrowed April. In just a few days, most of the girls former beauty had suddenly vanished. Her cheeks had sunken deeper inside her, leaving her cheekbones looking even more hollow. The usually wavy, honey blonde hair around her skull was now just tangled into a big knot at the back of her head. Her body hadn’t seem either sunlight or any for on nutrition in days, so naturally she was both pale and shaky. Her stomach growled loudly, demanding food once in a while. April just ignored it, and to be completely honest she even found the pains from the depth of her stomach satisfying at times. Punishing herself for her cowardly ways grew into a rather selfish act from her side. Instead of being brave and comforting her little sister, she choose the easy way. Rocking back and forth, back and forth. The lady landlord saw her shaking hands, her hollow cheeks and knew just what to do. After placing the mess of a girl on a kitchen chair, she forced some bread into her mouth. With no own sense of will, April just did as she demanded. She chew the dry bread that seemed to be swelling in her mouth, leaving a feeling that it would sooner or later cause her to suffocate. Of course, It didn’t. It just soothed the screaming, aching pain from her belly.  Her hair was brushed and placed in a ponytail, because the lady landlord saw no point in dressing her up any further. Anyone looking at April, seeing her pale skin and her dead eyes would know it instantly, this girl was sick from grief. She did not care about herself, her hygiene or her health. It pained her, the lady landlord to see such a beautiful girl in such a miserable state of mind. She had seen that sister of hers, the other blonde one coming to visit, planning how they were going to live. The young one, oh how would she manage? Did she have a good adoptive family? Supporting parents? It must be that way, because poor June had suffered enough already, and with April in her current state, she wouldn’t find much comforting.  It wasn’t too long to the cemetery, but for the lady landlord to basically carry a grown woman who was resting on her shoulders, the path seemed a lot longer. As fast as they saw it, April let go. She walked by herself, even if her legs were shaking and she had a hard time finding the balance. She stumbled forward, almost tripping on her too big high heeled shoes. As she reached the coffin, her eyes were set on May. She was so beautiful, yet so lifeless. She was pale, dead, nothing. It didn’t become more real than that, and in horror, April covered her mouth with her hand.  She had that blue ribbon in her hair. May had always loved that ribbon, and she herself had been so jealous. A blurry memory of May sitting on the kitchen chair, swinging her chubby baby legs. Her hair hadn’t even grown out yet and it was as sparse as a baby hair always is. Her hair had been as dark as their fathers even in the early years, while April and June had shared their mothers sunkissed hair. She had told May that day, just a baby of two that her hair wasn’t pretty enough to wear the beautiful ribbon. It would be prettier in her own hair, besides, blue and brown doesn’t go very well she had told her younger sister. May didn’t really understand, but she screamed and cried as April tried to steal her ribbon, loudly enough to catch their mothers attention. With her belly swollen, as she was pregnant with June she almost tumbled into the kitchen. That night, April got a long lecture in how to be a good sister that hadn’t left her head until this very day.  Chubby baby legs and a blue ribbon. The blue ribbon in her hair as she danced around in the yard. The blue ribbon in her hair as they played hide and seek. The image wouldn’t leave her mind. It wasn’t fair. It shouldn’t be her, she was too young, too pure, too loved. She shouldn’t have been the one lying there in the coffin, so gone. April grabbed her hand in her own, but just for a second. Almost in panic, she threw it back into the coffin again. Even if she knew she was dead, it came as a surprise that she was so cold, so dead once again. Battling with the emotions suddenly flashing back to her, it seemed impossible to speak. She wanted to give June a pep talk about how life was going to get better, how she was going to get through this, but she didn’t. She didn’t even believe it herself. This was the end of happiness, there were no return. She would never repair, never believe in happiness or justice ever again. This world was cruel, and whatever she loved would be taken from her. The murder of her mother had crushed her heart and her spirit, the betrayal of her father and his cruelty had left a gash in her heart that were never to be healed, but after finally reaching out to her sisters and finally feel happy again, then for the world to take that away from them, that was just too much.  Feeling the weight of the whole world on her shoulders, she stepped away from the coffin with her mouth wide open and her knees shaking. She fell down on her knees next to her sister, and carefully grabbed her cheek and lifted her head towards her own. As she saw her sister sky blue eyes, she finally just lost it. For the first time since she was a child, her noose started tickling and eyes stared burning. For just a few months, she had tasted the sweet sensation of happiness. Fooled by the illusion that it would last forever, the bittersweet pain almost felt too familiar. It was as if it was never meant for her to be happy, she simply would never walk that path. Almost a bit too eagerly, she could accept her own trail of misery, it was as if it was too known, too familiar, anything else seemed like a stranger, too unknown. The thought she couldn’t bare was the one of her sister, pure sweet little June had the same trail laid out for her. Her suffering would never end, and it seemed unlikely that happiness were anywhere to be found in this hellhole. As she took one last look at her dead sister, the grief swallowed her. In seconds, the tears started flooding from her eyes leaving wet trails on her cheeks. She reached out for June, and pulled her into her arms. “I’m so sorry” was the first words she had spoken since her sisters death, and they were also the only words she managed pressing out in her raspy, rattling voice. Over and over again, she repeated the words in between the moaning shrieks. Music: Toy Soldiers - Eminem hehe C; Notes: R.I.P May Rhodes  template by chelsey