~Choices~Actions~Consequences~ {Millionarrows}

[kittyoemily]

Aaron A

Age 17

District 1

Sitting there we were staring. I stared at them as they stared at me. Words not coming from any of us. I picked up my spoon keeping my eyes on theirs as the milk dripped down from the spoon and back into the bowl of cereal. They wanted me to talk but I didn't. They tried to play my game but they can't. Suddenly there are bursts of questions coming from my parents. I just stare at them as I tune them out. I had nothing to say. I may be talking more with lupas, but not them. Them pressing for more information has only made me bottle myself up some more.

Then the door bell rings. It saves me from having to zone them out some more. My spoon drops with a cling and I get up, and there is silence from our mouths. Silence because we all know who it is. The girl who has gotten me to speak more but not around them, gotten me to change my habits but not for them. I am reminded for a second that they are my parents and I should show them my love so I give them a small smile before I turned my back to them. I wanted to please them but lupas came first. All of my emotions and love would be saved for her, and her only. I felt them continue to stare at the back of my head. I gave them no answer back. Instead I started to wonder.

Wonder why she came here unannounced, why the door bell is being rang with more brisk than usual. A part of me knew I should be walking faster perhaps those guys were attacking her again, but then another part felt like it may be for another reason. One that I would never want to think about. One that is too sad for me to even think about. Could it happen this time? Even after the months we have been together? Could it end so quickly just like a tulip. It is open for one day but closed the next. The relationship fizzing out like a fire. The smoke forever in the atmosphere to never have been forgotten but the flames themselves gone. Could it really end just like that.

My palms sweat from anticipation. I found myself paused at the door. Hoping to make it last just a bit longer. Make it all last. The warmth I felt in my soul, the gleam that lit up my eyes. The love for life I had again, the wishing of something more than just going into the games to make my parents proud. The anticipation of what could come. What could I become. What could we become. For a minute I could hear nothing but my own breathing and heart beat. My heart went slower and slower. The thumping turned into pitter patters as if to allow me to listen to what she had to say.

And the door was opened. I had no clue of what she was thinking. Her expression was hard to read. Did I see fear? I had no clue. I scoped her up and down looking for an answer. I was reminded of my parents prying eyes. My prying eyes and face turns that of a smile at seeing her face. The glow of it all. I nodded towards her wanting to give her a hug or a kiss. To persuade her to stay with me. Only thing stopping me was her expression on her face. The only thing I could tell was she wanted to be in private. It was enough for me to get the hint. So I did what we usually do.

Without speaking I opened the door all the way to let her in and turned around to make my way upstairs. Like I did when my parents came home that first night we met. I just went upstairs expecting her to follow, for there is where I would be willing to talk, to prove myself to her. I just did not know what I was proving yet. Could she really be wanting to brake up. It was a stupid thing to think but she was getting chubbier so why would she want to brake up with me? My arrogance showed in that thought and I realized how unfair I was being. I was critiquing her on her weight when my faults were more annoying and repulsive to say the least. I could not even introduce her to let her in. I just gave her a nod and expected her to follow me up the stairs and to the room.

I bit my lips as I came to my room. I was not trying to protect my looks this time but eat away at my nervousness. Me being nervous during a fight almost never happens but when I am around Lupas I feel like I should worry what I do and say. That I should be someone better for her. I feel comfortable around her but I want her to feel comfortable around me. We are together and I needed her to feel the same about me as I did her. I found myself sitting on my bed waiting for her to follow. Perhaps she left, perhaps she was caught by my parents... the latter thought some how made me more nervous and I thought about going out there to stop them from trying to get info out of her. I got up off my bed and was ready to rush down stairs to yell at my parents, when the door creaked a bit more open. My eye brows raised, and I prepared myself for what she had to say to me.