No Third Chances [Septys JB Thread]

[Muffinface]

Wherever it's going, I'm gonna chase it
What's left of this moment, I'm not gonna waste it
Stranded together, our worlds have collided
This won't be forever, so why try to fight it?

The keepers lead him to a fat chair, armrests too high for any normal human. Carefully, he eases into it, keeping his dark gaze locked onto the hardwood floor. Wood paneling, wood floors, an empty, wooden boy.

The realization of 'Oh fuck what did I just do' slams into the male, and he quietly shoves his hands below his armpits. Who the fuck would take care of the boys now? No- he can't think that way. The entire point is to make Quadrys shape the fuck up, even if it meant giving the boy his body and soul, a mangled, malformed gift. Trembling fingertips push against dead eyes, his ghostly form hunches over.

Septys shoots upward as the door creaks open, feet plastered to the ground. He expects balled fists and screaming voice but instead he's greeted with a tall, unshaven man with worried eyes.
The kid he replaced.

Neither move, two giants staring each other down with unreadable faces, their eyes lingering on the other's face until Mohs steps first.

"Do you always visit?" Septys questions, the words falling out a tangled mess.

"When I can." Mohs answers, moving forward ungracefully. He favors his left leg heavily, and hauls himself to sit in another awkward chair across from Septys.

"Was that your brother?" Sep asks quietly, gaze burning a hole in that perfect hardwood floor.

"...No, he was my younger cousin."

Septys allows the words to hang, empty in the air. Heart beating in his throat, he opens his mouth, but no sound slips away. Mohs watches quietly, folding his left leg over his knee, leaning back. "You have brothers?" he questions. "At least one- Quadrys trains with us."

A single laugh, forced, lingers in the air. "Quadrys is my brother yeah. I've got two more at home somewhere."

Again, the silence hovers, thick. Neither speak for moments.

"Can you do me a favor?" Septys questions, a hurried glint rising to his eyes, horror on his countenance.

"Of course."

"Since... Since I took your place and all... Can you take mine? Can you make sure they have clothes and food and a roof? Please?"

Mohs, taken aback, stumbles over his thoughts for a moment, confused, unsure, his leg bouncing and twitching at the question.

"Please...? No one else will do it. Just... You don't have to buy things for them, Quadrys can... Quadrys will take care of that part. Make sure the bills are paid, maybe... Have dinner with them once a week or something I don't care, just keep them alive. Teach them the shit our parents never did, shit I never did."

Hardened eyes focus on the tribute, and a quiet nod releases a sigh from Septys. "Fuck... Thank you." he manages out, shoulders trembling, eyes threatening to spill forward with emotion. "I don't... I don't know what to do anymore-"

"Hold yourself together." Mohs snaps, suddenly transforming into that lion Septys sees in the training center, that man so desperate to bring another child, another son or daughter home. "You're from a carreer district. They're going to expect you to be rough and strong, emotionless. You're supposed to want this."

"But I don't."

"We never ask for the things we recieve. We don't... Raise our hand and suddenly get blessed by the universe. We have to fight, and you need to fight now. We both do. I'll get your family taken care of, but you... You better come home. Not in a box, not broken, beaten. Come home full, and if you have to leave, go out in a way that makes you look good."

Twitching cheeks, fingers shaking, his eyes lift to the male he replaced- so much more prepared, already he'd stiffened his spine for the inevitable removal.

Septys is still fighting it.

"...Yeah."

Mohs stands, bones creaking, joints aching while Sep rises as well. They connect, arms wrapping tightly around the other. Together, they pull away, and say no more as Mohs hobbles away, refusing to turn around to look back.

They both know, a tiny burning grain of sand nagging at their stomachs- this was it. The final goodbye. Neither would see the other again. 

[flyss]

FAMILY IS MORE THAN
THE BLOOD ON MY HANDS

When he said those words- those syllables- that lit a fire underneath me, everything that I had begun to recognize as neutral between both Septys and I fell, and burned, and crashed to the ground with a smoke that was nearly suffocating. 

I saw his hand go up before I heard his voice ignite, and the astounding crash that followed suit behind the waver of fingers made me want to run over and pound him into stardust because this galaxy just isn't big enough for the two of us. But I didn't, because I would let him have his fifteen minutes of fame. He wanted to kill himself over the trainwreck that was our family? All-fucking-right by me. 

After all, it's not like he was the first. 

Once the ceremonies had concluded and the crowds upon crowds of children began to celebrate the fact their lives were as normal as ever, I pushed and shoved, and clawed my way out of the mass, my legs carrying me toward the last place my brother would ever see in District One, whether he made it back alive or not. 

I hadn't paid enough attention to know if either Pentys or Octys had followed me, but at this point, I didn't give two shits about either of them. This was fucking personal between Septys and I, and when the lady at the counter of the justice building told me that he was already speaking with a visitor, I made it blatantly obvious that she was going to let me in or I was going to raise hell. 

She gave me a pat on the arm and asked me to sit down outside of a door down the hall. 

After about three minutes of waiting and a few rough-edged glares from a peacekeeper who stood next to the chair in which I sat, I watched a man walk out and a set of lips tell me that I could go in.

When I entered the room, I felt like I was thirteen again, my mother standing across the room from me with a gun pointed to her head, and a vengeance stationed in her eyes. Of course, this time, there was no gun, and there was certainly no mother spitting out the truth to a crying boy in a dress. However, when I saw him sitting in that chair, moments away from his departure- from his abandonment- I couldn't help but stomp up to him and grab a handful of his shirt into my fist. 

"What the fuck was that?" I knew I was going to get in trouble for doing this, and I knew that I was probably going to regret my approach eventually, when there is no brother to hold on to, but that didn't matter because this was betrayal. 

My fist is balled in anger, not in remorse.

Septys Nohve Lexig may be my blood, but he will never be my brother. 

491 WORDS

CREDIT TO TORI OF ADOXOGRAPHYV2

[Muffinface]

Wherever it's going, I'm gonna chase it
What's left of this moment, I'm not gonna waste it
Stranded together, our worlds have collided
This won't be forever, so why try to fight it?

What was once a noble effort transformed into a vain attempt to run- Septys allows his fingers to lift, and gently brush the flesh of his brother's the boy's hand. "Quadrys-" he begins, though the words quickly succumb to the sudden rush of guilt pouring through his throat. There's nothing he can say, his hands simply stroking the back of his hand so gently, so gingerly, he could have been a dove.

The words trip on his tongue, twisting, warping into different things- an apology, a eulogy, pleading for forgiveness. Nothing coherent passes through, and he struggles to keep the strong countenance Mohs convinced him to plaster to his features.

"He didn't stand a chance, can't you see?" he manages to snap, fingers gripping the shirt firmly as he rises, his swooping 6' frame enveloping his brother though he may struggle and fight. "He would never come home, and this was my last reaping anyway. Just let me go. Let me fucking go, for once in your life listen to me you little shit. Let it go."

There is nothing to be done, no more words he can say. No plea will ever reach those ears so far away. For the first time since their mother passed, Septys stares down at his brother, taking in those wide, steeled eyes, each and every scar on his quickly aging face. He never looked so.... Grown up before this final moment, and it lights a slight spark of hope between the cage of ribs in the male's chest.

Family.

Such an all encompassing word, such a deep, meaningful thing. Sep allows tired eyes to close, a final exhale slipping from his clenched lips.

"What do you want me to say?"

[flyss]

FAMILY IS MORE THAN
THE BLOOD ON MY HANDS

 "Why the fuck should I just 'let it go'?" When my fingers released his shirt, a fire so much warmer than the one he had lit under me pulsing through stale mind, I couldn't help but sigh in a frustration brighter than every star- every constellation- because he was abandoning us over some god damned boy who he probably hasn't even spoken a word do thusfar in his existence. 

"And he didn't stand a chance? What about us? Do you think that we fucking stand a chance without you?" By now, I was almost sure that my face was a mess of red- anger- and red- upset; this boy that I had spent my entire life defying had just defied me and boy- it was like I had been hit by a train. 

"If you hated me that god-damn much, then why didn't you just let me volunteer? I'm the burning issue in this family, Septys- can't you see that?" My eyes were red and my nails were digging into the palms of my hands with a weight that was impossibly strong. "First mom, then you? What a fucking coincidence." A dry laugh escaped my throat as I spoke, dressed-up feet pulling me back and forth in a pace before him, my stance stopping rigidly in the centre because shit- I was just saying things to say them at this point and to be utterly honest, that was unacceptable. I was unacceptable. 

With a hand running through my hair, I sighed and lowered my voice, attempting to hide the cracking that was sure to come in the following moment. "Septys, no matter much I may hate you right now, the only thing I want you to say is that you will come back." My volume was rising with every word and I could feel my eyes start to burn as I held my weakness in. "Please, please say that you'll come back, Septys. Please."

And I knew that my facade was over because I could hear the desperation in my voice.

This man was the glue that held my tower together and I was crumbling crumbling crumbling to the floor because jesus christ- what had we gotten ourselves into? 

370 WORDS

CREDIT TO TORI OF ADOXOGRAPHYV2

[Muffinface]

You only just discovered the sun
O N T H E L A S T D A Y

And like that, the kid's mask shatters into thousands of razor-sharp reflectors, a mirror image of the utter terror coursing through Septys' own veins. Years of silence, nearly half a decade of frustrated, pent up fury and blame cascade from Septys in an immense exhale of wind, sour turned pure.

It's the closest thing to an appology he'll ever get out of Quadrys. Twitching fingers, hard, coarse from holding together this rough-edged family collapse against the prominent bones of his brother's jaw, lifting his chin to stare deadpan into his eyes.

For a moment he remains silent, unable to say anything, simply holding the male in place. A hand dips, dropping into a pocket of his finely pressed slacks, withdrawing a thin circle of gold.

"I have to come back- I don't trust you with this." he jokes, and though his tone is lightened, it carries the weight of the world creased between folded sylables. He presses the wedding band, metal warm, into the boy's fist, lips gently gracing his worried forhead.

"You will survive, and you will be alright. You've made it this far already. Maybe... Maybe dad'll come around, maybe you'll step up."

The male's shoulders broaden for a moment, proud.

"You have to step up."

A wetness forms behind his eyes, dripping, splashing forward onto the perfect tile floor. Just one chunk of marble could feed his family for a week.

"And when I win, we'll have a huge ass house in the victor's village and I can get you whatever the fuck you want and we can all be okay for once in our god forsaken lives."

[flyss]

FAMILY IS MORE THAN
THE BLOOD ON MY HANDS

I am a ticking time bomb and my fingers are the fuses, counting down from ten, to nine, to eight, to seven, to six, to five, to four, to three, to two, to one, because I'm running out of time, and it'll never be enough, this little moment Septys and I have left. 

But he hands me something, and the time begins to slow to a halt because this is her ring- this is her ring- and when he hands it to me, its warm as if she had been wearing it all this time. 

I nearly drop it. 

"You will survive, and you will be alright." His words pierce a hole in my chest and I'm drowing in my own blood because in all honesty, this seems too final for him to be returning. "You've made it this far already. Maybe... Maybe dad'll come around, maybe you'll step up." But hee's just saying that and it hurts becaus, he's just saying that, he's just saying that, HE'S JUST FUCKING SAYING THAT. 

But I know that in a few weeks, I'll be the one 'just saying that' because he's not coming back, he's leaving me, he's leaving me, and I can't stop him now because I've already messed up far too much for these wounds to be sutured by simply telling him to do it for me- to do it for our family. 

(Don't leave me, Septys, don't leave me.)

So I pull him close and feel the wetness cascade down my cheeks like the beginning of a storm, the pound of thunder keeping tempo in the background like it belongs there, when it clearly doesn't. It belongs in my chest, an irregular heartbeat, a signal that I'm still human. 

And he tells me how our future will be brighter when he returns, how we'll be able to live a normal life when he returns, but he's lying because he won't return. Nobody returns from the games, whether they're alive or not and it pains me because the second he volunteered for that boy's spot, he sold himself to death, signing the paper by shaking the hand of his district partner and smiling- half-smiling- at the crowd before him.

I may be a career, but I sure as hell know the truth. 

"Septys.. Septys- please don't leave me."

386 WORDS

CREDIT TO TORI OF ADOXOGRAPHYV2

[Muffinface]

You only just discovered the sun
O N T H E L A S T D A Y

Tight clamped fists pull the now oldest brother close, his lips trembling on the perfectly combed mop of hair, his jaws a tight vice to prevent any promises or words from escaping.

He feels the liquid, holds the trembling boy close, an arm tightening around his shoulders to heave him ever closer, his own eyes sliding closed. Nothing. There is nothing left to say, nothing left to do, but stand in this eternal embrace, two brothers separated by years, by pain, by blame. A photograph is worth a thousand words, and Septys would take a thousand photographs if it meant Quadrys would stop crying.

"I love you." he whispers, breathing in the very essence of the young man before him, finally prying his torso away. Slim fingers drop, gingerly brushing away the torrent of tears, twisting those perfect eyes to stare up, his own gazing down. "I will never leave you. Sometimes, when you feel incredible, and you finally love yourself, that's me, loving you."

His shoulders break, and again, his arms twist, dragging the boy against his chest. He doesn't want to talk anymore, doesn't want to say goodbye- gods, why did he fucking volunteer. Mohs could have handled himself, why the fuck did he step up-

Because too many fractured bones, crippling words, and late nights long contorted what they should have been- a family. Each is more concerned with their own needs than the needs of the others, and the skeleton they provide is hardly enough meat to consider a feast, their bonds easily broken by the slightest force.