broken reality {cato}

[d4a tide evros {ems}]

I ' M F A L L I N G A P A R T

KRAYGON TRUUS

LEAVE ME HERE FOREVER IN THE DARK.

Criminals never choose the life they live. No, it chooses them. Decisions are placed before every person rotting behind the bars fearful of the future. I was sitting there for many days wasting away to nothing. My bones were eating my skin turning me into a simple skeleton. Many questions were thrown at me, and I wasn’t sure how to answer them. Every time I spoke barbed wires pierced my skin sending jolts of electricity throughout my entire body. Each movement brought forth a rain of blows from a baton. Stainless steel blades tore through my skin. High pitched screams continue to ring through my ears as they played audio over and over of Esme saying she hated me. The jagged edge of a whip at through my back threatening to remove all the skin leaving nothing but bare bones.

It all happened over the days. Soon, I became numb to the pain. Nothing hurt anymore. All the emotions ran away. Pain didn’t exist. Hate didn’t exist. All that remained locked away was a shell of a man who once had a life. A man who cared about everyone. A man who loved his family more than anything. That man was gone. He fled from me the moment she died. And now I’m trapped in a body that doesn’t belong to me. I’m controlled by the Capitol, and just the other day they proved it in the middle of the district square.

Majority of the pain is gone now. Yet with every breath I take it sends fire shooting throughout my body. Wearing a shirt is almost impossible because the cotton fabric sticks to my raw back. Blood stains the skin, and even right now it feels like the wounds are still oozing. I haven’t been able to see the damage done, but I know it’s bad because of how angry the peacekeepers were. Surely they’ll understand that I had no choice. The Capitol ruined my life, and I have set out on a mission to ruin theirs. Sure, it wasn’t their fault Esme was reaped for the games, and it wasn’t their fault she died, but they work for him. President Snow.

If I ever saw him in person, I would bash his skull in for everything he has done. He ruined my life. Had Esme not been reaped, I wouldn’t have been locked away. I wouldn’t have bludgeoned the peacekeeper in the district square, yet they made sure my life was ruined.

Waves of red, yellow, and orange fly through the sky with an Autumn breeze. Summer has gone away. Winter lurks around the corner threatening to eat away at the starving citizens of district ten. Even behind bars in the detention center, I felt the cold eating away at my soul. A human goes in, but what comes out isn’t a human. It’s a virtual death sentence. Everything someone cared about is gone in the blink of an eye. All that remains is a person terrified of what could happen. Death would’ve been the best option, yet they kept me alive. They wanted me to survive the tortuous ways of the world.

But they allowed her to die.

Sometimes my mind twists to the girl resting on the metal shelf above mine. She was taken away from the cell by the same peacekeepers that removed me leading me towards the interrogations every single day. Only she never returned. I never saw her again. Maybe they set her free in the arms of the angels reaching down from the sky. Or maybe they removed her tongue like so many others who’ve gone through the detention center. The screams still haunt me. Or maybe they set her free. I’ll never know.

Kicking dirt in every direction, I stop in front of the old house. Ma and Pa have to be worried sick about me despite my constant warnings. Worrying about me is just about the same as worrying about a bug being eaten by a bird. It doesn’t matter. When I came home this way after working all days on the farm, Esme would run outside to greet me. She’d shout my name alerting the family I was home. She’d run towards me, and I’d wrap my arms around her and embrace her in the biggest hug.

Even now it feels like I can hear her shouting my name, but it’s just a ghost whispering in my ear because she’s dead. She won’t ever run from the house again. I won’t ever see her anymore. I missed her own funeral because they took me away.

Sitting down on the dirt path leading towards the house, I bring my knees to my chest. Ever since I’ve been released, I’ve found one way to control the pain, but it’s only temporary, yet in that split second it brings great joy to my life. I made a promise to destroy every last one of the peacekeepers, and I won’t stop until it’s accomplished. Cackling, I rest my head on my knees as tears well up in the corner of my eyes.

Part of me is waiting for sweet little Esme to run out of the door, but the other part is waiting for an off duty peacekeeper to make his rounds.

Yet all that greets me is silence.

table by elegant

[Cato]

[googlefont="Rock Salt:400"]

Turian Truus Eighteen | Male | District Ten

Straw plasters against my face because of how much I’ve been sweating. With the weather starting to get cold, I have to make sure the animals are taken care of. Madeline is doing her part a lot, and Aaron helps sometimes, but most of the time he’s lost in his own world. He does that a lot especially since Esme died. Sometimes I wish I could help him, but there’s nothing I can do for him. Today seems worse on him for some reason, so I’ve let him sleep. Turning towards Madeline, I look at her. It’s like she’s only a servant here, and honestly, I want to treat her more like family. Dropping the bale of straw in front of me, I stop everything that I’m doing before speaking to her. “Maddy, do you think the cows ever get cold? Especially the calves?” At first she doesn’t answer me, but all she does is nod her head. For some reason, she doesn’t speak much, and it aggravates me. I just want to be friendly with her. Sighing softly, I pick up the bale of straw. Looking out in the distance, I notice the sun is starting to fall behind the trees for the night. I love the colors it turns the sky especially with the breeze sending leaves floating through the air. “Well, Maddy, I guess we should finish for the night.” And once again she completely ignores me. Sometimes I wonder what her life would be like if they hadn’t took me in when I was so young. Maddy was young too. Maybe she misses her family. “Yeah, Turian. We should go before it gets too late.” She speaks, but then she’s gone. Throwing the last bale of straw in with the cows, I grab all my supplies, and remove my gloves from my hands. It’s not too dark yet, but it will be soon, and I really want to be inside the house before peacekeepers make their rounds. They don’t like it when anyone is out late. They think we’re up to no good. Perhaps that’s the truth. Locking the barn up, I turn away from it and head down the tiny dirt path back to the house when I see someone sitting on the ground only feet away from the house. My first instinct is to grab my wire cutters from my pocket before slowly making my way towards them. Many thoughts race through my mind as I wonder who it could be. Taking slow, deep breaths I allow myself to focus and prepare myself for whatever may happen. Why would someone be sitting on the ground watching the house? Why would they just sit there? Shaking my head, I throw all the thoughts away. I hear the cackling of a madman. Every hair stands on end as I slowly get closer, but the person sitting on the ground is not a madman. No, it’s Kraygon. Excitement courses through my veins because it’s been so long since I’ve seen him, and I thought he was dead, and I can stop myself from shouting his name. “Kraygon!”

OOC notes go here Ems gave me the dialogue for Maddy Truus

[d4a tide evros {ems}]

I ' M F A L L I N G A P A R T

KRAYGON TRUUS

LEAVE ME HERE FOREVER IN THE DARK

Silent tears stream down my face freezing against my cheeks from the autumn air. Every breath, every little movement, hurts. Pain shoots through my body as my shirt sticks to my raw back. But I don’t try to remove it as it’ll only reopen the wounds. Yet nothing exists. Pain doesn’t last forever. No, eventually it vanishes leaving my body numb forever. Nothing will ever compare to the pain of losing someone close to my heart. The detention center tortured me physically and mentally. The pain went away. It vanished into thin air, but the void inside my chest never went away.

The void grows larger and larger with each breath. Nothing can close it. No amount of closure will take away the agony lingering inside my veins. It’s bad enough that my last words to her was that I hated her, but I couldn’t even go to her funeral. I couldn’t say final goodbyes. Three years have gone by. They’ve changed my entire world, and nobody understands what death would do for me. They don’t understand that I want to die because it would reunite me with her, and I could tell her how sorry I am. (“It’s too late, Kraygon. She won’t ever forgive you. She won’t ever love you. Even when you die, she’ll want your body to rot.”)

Bringing my knees closer to my chest, I try to hide my face from anyone that would be looking as I wait for her to bring me to her. I want to hold her. To wrap my arms around her and promise that I won’t ever leave her. It’s too late for that, though. She’s gone. Six feet under the ground. Dead. Never to return. I swear I can see her dancing through the wind. A ghost of girl. Carefree. Nothing to worry about. Free from the chains of the world. But I miss her. Every second. Every single day. I can’t even live with myself. I want to die, yet killing myself isn’t the answer. She wouldn’t ever forgive me if I left the world before my time.

The sound of footsteps coming towards me snaps me back to reality, and for a split second I think Esme will be running out of the door to wrap her arms around me. To tell me that she’s missed me as much as I’ve missed her. But it’s not her. No, it’s someone else, and they’re coming closer and closer. Each step grows louder and the pace quickens against the dirt ground. Maybe it’s a peacekeeper who will finally grant my wish. But when I hear them shouting my name, I know it’s nobody who wants to kill me. It’s someone who’s happy to see me. It’s someone who cares about me in a world where nobody cares and all love is a lie.

Raising my gaze, I see Turian running towards me. I want to tell him to go away. To just leave me alone, but I don’t have it inside of me. It’s been along time since I’ve seen him. Since I’ve talked to him. Raising a shaky hand, I try to wipe the tears away except they start flowing much faster. I can’t bring myself to speak as a river pours down my face. It’s not the same as seeing the tiny girl running to me, but seeing Turian running towards me is enough to make me realize that I’m not alone, and I’ll never be alone. Animal like sounds fall from my lips as I try to bring myself to speak, but I can’t. I’m afraid of what I’ll say, or worse, what he’ll do to me. Speaking before only brought great pain. Both physically and mentally.

I just hope he understands.

table by elegant

[Cato]

[googlefont="Rock Salt:400"]

Turian Truus Eighteen | Male | District Ten

I can't explain the excitement I feel right now knowing that he's alive. Knowing that he's alright, that he's here with us now. But at the same time, I don't know where he went or why he disappeared. I want to know more. I run faster towards him and notice that the clothes he's wearing swallows him, and it's not his normal clothing. The clothing is gray like he was somewhere where the uniform the was given to him. But the next thing I see worries me even more. The back of his shirt is stained crimson, and it looks completely saturated. My heart sinks into my stomach when I see his facial expression of pain and tears. But I don't know how to help him. And honestly, I'm not sure I want to. "Kraygon, are you alright?" I ask with my head cocked sideways trying to figure out what's wrong. It's been almost three full years since I've seen him. Since I've talked to him. After Esme died, he vanished. He just left without a trace. "What happened to you?" I may be throwing too many questions at him, but I'm not sure. I want to help him. I want to get him inside because it's dark out and the peacekeepers will be coming soon, and they don't like anyone out after curfew. But I can't just leave him behind. I want to help him. Crouching down, I sit down beside him trying to figure out what's going on. I want to know more. I have so many questions I want to ask him, but first we need to get out of here. He doesn't look well, and I want to get him out of the weather to help him. Maybe Maddy can help him since she's a vet and all that. "Kraygon, we need to get going. It's dark and the peacekeepers will be coming soon. We're closer to the barn than we are the house. Let's go there for the night." I slowly get to my feet. Once we get inside the barn, I can ask him questions. I can learn more, but right now making sure he's safe is my priority.

OOC notes go here

[d4a tide evros {ems}]

I ' M F A L L I N G A P A R T

KRAYGON TRUUS

LEAVE ME HERE FOREVER IN THE DARK

Shattered dreams fall apart around me. The world keeps moving leaving behind those who can’t move anymore. Labored breaths fill my lungs, and it hurts to move. A warm, sticky liquid leaks from the wounds in my back staining the ground red. My blood pools beneath the thin shirt covering my hollow body. Tears stain my cheeks. Turian must feel hurt because I left him along with everyone else. Bailey, Evelyn, Madeline, Aaron. My family. But I am not a son, a brother, nor a cousin anymore. No, I am an outcast. Banned from society. Locked away inside a cell without a key to open it. I am a prisoner of my own mind. Breaking free is impossible. Isn’t that what they wanted? To lock me away for the rest of my life trapped within a mind full of agony and misery?

“Kraygon, are you alright?” Words catch in the back of my throat the moment Turian stands beside me. A face full of concern glares at me, and I glare back. Lifeless, soulless eyes fix on his as tears continue running down my face. Snot drips from my nose mixing with the water swimming from my eyes. Slowly, I shake my head. Words fail to form on my tongue. They took it away from me. They made sure I wouldn’t say another word. No, they didn’t remove my tongue, but each time a single word fell from my lips electricity shot through me suffocating the life out of a broken body. Hollow bones begged for mercy as animal like sounds passed through my lips. Demons lurk in the shadows, and I’m afraid they’ll find me and torture me; when I close my eyes I can see them.

Yet I can’t speak as my teeth chatter together as a gentle breeze fills the air sweeping leaves from the ground. Wrapping the large clothes around me, I try to maintain my body heat. Chills run down my spine, and my entire body starts shivering. Turian offers shelter. The barn where the animals are. Even that would offer more heat than sitting out in the open waiting for a peacekeeper to make rounds. A promise was made inside the dark walls of the detention center, and I am a man of my word, but taking a peacekeeper on now in such a weak and fragile state would only end in my death or another trip to the cell where I surely wouldn’t end up free a second time.

The palms of my hands press firmly to the ground, and I try to force myself into a standing position. Every muscle inside my body starts quivering from a new strain placed upon them. It’s been such a long time since I’ve tried to do something other than crawl or scoot. Only the jagged edge of a whip could bring me to my feet without any trouble, but none of that is here. “Dark. Fires. Souls.” Meaningless words slither off my tongue into the frigid air. And I’m finally standing on my own two feet ready to move.

Step after step, I try to move forward away from the dirt path. It seems like I’m going to make it to the barn. I’m almost there -

My knees break under the weight of my body, and I’m falling towards the ground. Arms stretched out in front of me to break my fall. But at the last second I bring them in, and I see the ground coming closer and closer and closer -

I'm going to die.

(“Soon you’ll learn the meaning of death.”)

Thud!

Dirt flies into my mouth, and tears run down my face. Violent sobs escape from my lips as I try to move, but I can’t. I don’t want to. It’s impossible to turn over. Fire burns throughout my body; a never ending fire. But I’m trapped within. Lost within my own mind. Alone and afraid.

Help. Please. I want to beg, but the words are blocked by my own tears.

table by elegant

[Cato]

[googlefont="Rock Salt:400"]

Turian Truus Eighteen | Male | District Ten

Kraygon is shaking his head at my question. Not sure what I can do for him. If he's in pain, he's not speaking up. I'm not sure if I should call for help or try to coax the problem out of him. I haven't seen him in forever though. I'm baffled by his behavior. Why won't he speak to me? Does Kraygon not want to be here? "Dark. Fires. Souls." He speaks, but only further confuses me. No idea what that means. Dark, fires, and souls. Did he burn someone in the dark and he's running? I see him now making the attempt to rise up. He's definitely in some kind of pain, I just can not figure out what it might be. He's walking though so I conclude he must be exhausted or something. I take a few steps myself when I hear a thud on the ground. He's collapsed. I'm hearing him sob and for reasons unbeknown to me, I have tears of my own flowing. I haven't seen him in ages. He's in pain. I crouch on my knees next to him attempting to offer him words that'll soothe him. I hope he listens to me. Ripred knows he needs it. "Kraygon, brother, I'm here. Allow me to help you to the barn." Again, I get no words from him. He does allow me to help him to his feet though. With his arm around my neck, I help lead him to the barn. It's a silent walk, and I can't imagine why he's so quiet. Before he disappeared, he talked without stopping. Something is totally different, and it pains me that he doesn't trust me. That he won't tell me what's going on. But maybe it's my own fault. Maybe I've thrown too many questions to him. I sigh quietly the moment we reach the barn. Raising my hand up, I grab the small oil lantern from the corner. It's only been used once, and that was when I thought someone was trying to break in. Not having a lot of money is hard, but at least I have this. It belongs to the family, but I use it too. I turn the nob, and the flame comes to life. Straw and hay spreads across the stable floors, and I can hear all the animals sleeping except one, Esme's cow, Cowie. "Here, sit down. Get warm." I let go of him as I close the barn doors. At least we're safe in here.

OOC notes go here

[d4a tide evros {ems}]

I ' M F A L L I N G A P A R T

KRAYGON TRUUS

LEAVE ME HERE FOREVER IN THE DARK

The world grows dark around me as buzzing roars in my ears. A never ending stream flows from my eyes flooding the ground below me. For a moment he’s gone. I’m alone. Abandoned without a place to go. Trapped in a sea of shame and regret. Agony swims through my veins when the buzzing is replaced by the sounds of footsteps returning. But the overwhelming sense of regret eats through me. Turain deserves better than a cold shoulder; he didn’t do anything wrong. Mistakes were made. Screens came crashing down. Glass shattered into millions of shards. Flames danced through the windows of the justice building, and here I am now. Locked away in a non existing world forgotten by those around me until he returns -

“Kraygon, brother, I’m here. Allow me to help you to the barn.” His words are gentle and easy. Kind and peaceful, but I still can’t bring myself to speak. Yet each time his voice rings through my ears, I can hear the amount of concern, the pain lingering inside the pits of his stomach. No words can describe the amount of torment lingering inside mine.

Yet it’s all taken away the moment his arms wrap around my body pulling me to a standing position. White fire shoots through my body the moment my own arms move. Raw pieces of flesh dangle from my back stretching wider. A pool of tears and blood flows across my feet before the dirt devours it. But it’s not enough to keep me going. A shaky hand stretches across my face wiping the tears away as an eternal flame flickers inside my body. Whatever is tethering me to reality is slowly ripping apart, and I can’t stop it.

Turian leads the way, and I stagger beside him like a drunk. My vision blurs as the pain grows in intensity. A fire eats through my skin with every single step, and I’m stumbling over my own two feet. If it wasn’t for Turian holding me up, the ground would devour my body once more.

A lifetime sweeps through the air before we finally reach the barn. Gritted teeth, heavy, labored breathing, and tears of agony take over my body as he turns some sort of lamp on. A tiny flame dances inside of it lighting the barn. A hard floor meets my bottom when his hand releases me. But all I can do is stare as the back of my shirt rips apart exposing my raw, bloodstained back.

They’ve done a lot of work keeping the barn together. The animals are safe. They’re doing fine from what I can see.

Downcast eyes look at the animals and what all I’ve missed since they took me away. Calves sleep beside their mother. Foals curl up against the warm fur of parents. Goats sleep in the corner. Pigs share a stable. All of this I’ve longed for, for so long. Yet here it is sitting right in front of me, and I can’t even bring myself to move towards them.

Silent sobs escape from my lips. My knees fold beneath me, and I lean forward at the waist until my head touches the ground. I have missed so much. I remember when Esme would follow me to the barn. I remember when Evelyn would carry a tiny bucket of feed. I remember when Maddy saved a prized pig from death. But I can’t remember the last time I’ve placed food down before them. I can’t remember the last time I pet all the animals; even their names have left my mind. But nothing makes sense anymore. It was all taken away, and now it’s here right in front of me again. Silence rings through my ears as I force myself to sit up.

Words linger on the tip of my tongue begging for freedom, but my vocal chords refuse to react until I force the breath into my throat. "I am sorry." It’s the only words I’m capable of saying right now because every other sentence refuses to register in my mind.

That’s when I watch Cowie collapse to the ground.

My eyes are wide as I stare at the motionless cow. It’s not just a cow. This cow is family, and it’s been so long since I’ve seen her. My nails dig into the ground as I crawl across the room screaming the cow’s name over and over.

My arms drag me under the stable door, and I’m lying beside her pressing my ear against her chest begging for a heartbeat. And I feel the gentle rise and fall of her chest, but I can tell something’s wrong. Panic takes over leaving me numb.

I’ve lost Esme. I can’t lose Cowie too.

table by elegant

[Cato]

[googlefont="Rock Salt:400"]

Turian Truus Eighteen | Male | District Ten

The door clicks shut, and I turn around to ask Kraygon something when I notice his back. My eyes widen with fear as I stare at it. A lump forms in the back of my throat. It looks like someone took a rake, or some sort of gardening tool and went crazy with it. I can’t move. I can’t do anything. I’m just stuck staring at his back. Blood oozes from his wounds. He needs to get that taken care of before it becomes infected and he dies from it. The pain he was in make sense now along with the blood saturated shirt. But what happened to him? How can I ask him what’s wrong? I know he disappeared for a long time. Did the peacekeepers take him away to the detention center? Did they hurt him like this? It’s bound to have happened because Maddy said he pretty much demolished the district square. My heart breaks for him, and I want to save him. To help him, but soon he’s dragging himself across the floor with a purpose. I try to stop him because he doesn’t need to move. Not with his back looking the way it is, but I shift my gaze from his back, and I see Cowie laying on the floor of the stable. No. No. No. Please Cowie. Please be okay. I can’t imagine what would happened if she died right now. She belongs to Esme. And Esme’s dead, and the cow can’t die. But I don’t know what to do. I’m helpless in this situation. I’m just a farmer who makes sure the stables are full of straw and hay for the animals. I make sure to lock up at night. But I don’t know how to save one. I hold onto hope as Kraygon places his ear against her chest. Everything inside of me is begging for some sort of reaction from him. But I can tell by his eyes that something’s wrong. His eyes are filled with worry when before they were hollow. My mind begins to race as I try to figure out what to do. ”Kraygon?” My voice is quiet. My hands shake at my side as I run over towards him. He needs someone to help his back. To dress the wounds. To make sure they aren’t infected, but if this is the same Kraygon I know, he’s going to do everything he can to make sure Cowie is safe. ”Kraygon?” I ask again waiting for some sort of answer. Something that’ll tell me what to do. Something that’ll make sure our precious Cowie survives.

OOC notes go here

[d4a tide evros {ems}]

I ' M F A L L I N G A P A R T

KRAYGON TRUUS

LEAVE ME HERE FOREVER IN THE DARK

Broken beats bounce through my skull ricocheting around inside my brain until the sound of a silent pulse embeds in my mind. Something moves inside her. A stomach punches me in the face as it growls in the middle of the night sky. A beast lingers inside the body threatening to burst through at any possible second. But I’m unsure of what this beast is.

My hand strokes the cow’s side gently reassuring her that I’m by her side. A shallow breath catches in the back of my throat as my newly found adrenaline masks the fire burning inside me. Silence roars through my ears keeping the entire world at ease until nothing remains except the sound of a beating heart -

Thud.

Thud.

Thud.

- repeats itself over and over. Cowie is alive. Her lungs are expanding forcing air into her lungs before expelling the carbon dioxide as her body relaxes. Yet something isn’t right. Her legs are weak. Her body fragile, but it can’t be from old age. Esme brought her home as a calf four years before the arena took her life away. The cow can’t be older than eight. Every single cow I’ve raised over the years has never died at such a young age, but just like human beings, cows can die before their time too.

This cow cannot die.

I promised to keep her safe long before Esme journeyed through the games. Pa promised to never slaughter it even if the Capitol demanded it. These promises cannot be broken. But eventually they would when the cow was suffering from old age. But only then would the cow die. Not now. Not before her time. Yet nothing makes sense. Perhaps she wasn’t taken care of like I originally thought. No, that’s not it. The other animals have been cared for. Cowie has been cared for. Straw covers the floor of her stall along with the rest of the barn. Yet why is she like this? Why did she collapse?

Nothing matters right now. No amount of pain could stop me from trying to tend to the cow to make sure nothing happened to her. Yet each passing second sends her beating heart into a weaker and weaker pulse.

What do I do?

I have to save her.

Sweet little Cowie gave Esme so much hope throughout her short life. She brought a girl from a lonely place into a world where she had someone to care for. Cowie brought us closer. She pulled us together for a common cause. To raise a cow without a tether around it’s neck sentencing it to slaughter. But even the toughest can’t escape the might grasp of the Capitol.

(Big brother’s watching.)

His silent pleas fill my ears, and I’m at a loss of words. Nothing can be done right now. But maybe together we can find some help. Something to save her. To make a sick cow better. Silence surrounds me. Darkness is slowly closing in, and it’s threatening to steal the one piece of love I have left. The one tiny thread keeping me afloat.

“Kraygon.”

My mind freezes, and I stare at the cow refusing to move my gaze. Silence greets me. It always has and it always will. But I don’t know how to save her. Please just let me save her. That’s when it hits me. Maddy is a vet.

Maddy can save her.

“Turian,” I state is name. It’s not a question. It’s a quiet demand. “We can’t let this cow die.” It’s a hope that he knows what to do. That perhaps he knows where Maddy is, but right now. It’s a statement to tell him that Cowie might not make it.

table by elegant

[Cato]

[googlefont="Rock Salt:400"]

Turian Truus Eighteen | Male | District Ten

He’s silent, and it’s making me more nervous. I’m unsure of what to do. I was just here a little bit ago, and she seemed fine, but now she’s not. My mind races, and I don’t know what to do. I move closer towards them, and I lower myself on the ground and place my head on top of Cowie’s. I want to help. I want to make sure she’s okay because I don’t know if I can live without her. She’s been there for me. Even when Kraygon was gone after Esme died, this cow kept me sane. My darkest secrets hide inside her, and I don’t want her to die. I can’t afford to lose this cow. Truth be told, nobody can. Cowie is part of our family. Everyone has vowed to keep her safe especially since Esme died in the games. It’s our duty to make sure she survives. I hope she’s just sick. Maddy knows how to heal the sick animals. She knows what to do to make them better. She asked me to help once, but I wasn’t much help. It made me sick to see what she was doing. I’m glad she can do it. I’m glad she can take care of the animals. I really want to help out, but the most I can do is make sure they’re fed and watered every single day. It’s became a normal part of my life. But I always take more time with Cowie because she’s not food, and she’ll never become food. ”Turian.” I hear my name. It’s the first thing Kraygon has said to me all evening, and I know this is important. I know that something is wrong, but I deny it inside my brain to keep myself from falling apart. ”We can’t let this cow die.” The last word causes my heart to sink deep into my stomach as realization sets in. Cowie is sick, and there’s a good chance she’s going to die, but why? Why does it have to happen now? Why can’t the cow die of old age? Why couldn’t Esme die of old age? It’s beyond my wildest imagination, but I can’t help it. I can’t make sense of it. I have no idea how to save her. That’s when it hits me. Maddy is an animal doctor. She knows what she’s doing, and hopefully she can save Cowie. It’s important to me, and I know it’s important to Kraygon and Evelyn and Bailey and Aaron too. This cow can’t die right now. We have to do something. ”Kraygon, we need Maddy.” I try to remain calm when I speak, but there’s a sense of urgency in my words. ”I can go get her. You can stay here.” I know he won’t listen, but it’s my hope he will. He’s injured. His back is destroyed, and he’ll only weigh me down if I try to take him with me.

OOC notes go here

[d4a tide evros {ems}]

I ' M F A L L I N G A P A R T

KRAYGON TRUUS

LEAVE ME HERE FOREVER IN THE DARK

Silence fills the air. Turian isn’t moving from his place, and the words linger on the tip of my tongue as I fight myself not to repeat any of it. Cowie is dying, yet it seems like he doesn’t care. My entire world is crashing around me. A dark abyss is sweeping through carrying it all away in the blink of an eye. A storm rages inside of me. Tidal waves crash inside my lungs making it impossible to breathe. I’m frozen in place unable to move. Unable to do anything except pray to a higher being to save this cow from death.

Silence eats away at my soul. It devours my entire being leaving nothing but a rotting corpse of a man who once cared about life. Nothing in my life matters right now. All that matters is saving Cowie. Keeping this precious animal alive for as long as possible. But it appears the gods have a different plan.

It’s impossible to know what to do as silence creeps through the air. My words fell on deaf ears. Turian isn’t helping right now. All he’s doing is procrastinating making the amount of time we’re dealing with wind down until the last second on the timer expires. Yet he’s pretending to care as his head presses down upon the head of the cow. He’s pretending this cow means the world to him. Oh how I can feel the lie eating away inside of my body, twisting my insides together into a knot -

“Kraygon, we need Maddy.”

Those were the words I needed to hear. We need Maddy. My heart leaps into my throat before finally settling down. Time is running out. A clock is ticking somewhere. A fuse slowly fades away as it gets closer and closer to detonating a bomb filled with chaos. Yet here I am staring into his eyes fighting to figure out what’s right and wrong.

Tunnel vision eats through my body. A very important member of the family is dying before my eyes, and I can’t do anything to stop it. It’s tearing my life into pieces. Crushing my soul into tiny bits of dust.

Questions dance across my mind destroying my body. But nothing compares to the answers resting before me. All that is good is slowly turning bad, and all that is bad is slowly turning into evil. Darkness is reigning over the world. Soon the light will vanish leaving every good thing behind.

Why is this happening?

Why is the world falling apart?

“I can go get her. You can stay here.

HIs words tear through my soul with an icy chill. Only a foolish man would even begin to think I’d remain behind in a barn instead of running to the safety of another person, but Turian isn’t foolish. He’s only thinking of what’s best for everyone. Yet it destroys me on the inside. I am more than capable of handling myself. Of showing the world that I am strong when people think I’m weak. But I will not remain behind.

Cowie is in need, and I must run for her aid.

“I cannot honor that request, my brother, for I must find her.”

Straw embeds into the palm of my hand as I force myself into a standing position, and for a moment the world spins around me threatening to knock me on my face again. “Don’t worry, Cowie. I’ll be back. I promise. Just hang in there a little longer.” Silent tears slide down my face as I turn away from the cow.

Staggering to the back of the barn, I use the stall doors to keep myself on my feet. Urgency flies through my body knowing that I made a promise I must keep. Cowie must survive. She must see my return.

My feet slip out from under me, and I’m falling once more until my hands connect with the handle of the door, and I pull myself to my feet once more. Once I’m outside the barn, my body becomes numb. “Maddy!” My voice is loud as I scream for Maddy. But I doubt she can hear me from this distance. “Maddy!”

And I’m falling.

The ground is coming closer and closer -

Arms fly out from behind me landing under my arms keeping me on my feet after I hear the barn door close. “Turian. We have to get her.” I can feel the world pressing down upon me. It’s giving me a weight that’s almost unbearable. One I can’t handle alone. But Turian is here. And together we can hold it up. Together we can keep each other standing.

“Maddy!” I scream once more as we get closer to the house and the lights flick on. A sigh of relief floods my veins, but I can’t catch my breath as she opens the door.

“Kraygon, Turian, what is it?”

I try to speak, but all I can do is pant and wheeze.

table by elegant

[Cato]

[googlefont="Rock Salt:400"]

Turian Truus Eighteen | Male | District Ten

“I cannot honor that request, my brother, for I must find her.” It doesn’t shock me that he doesn’t do as I requested. This cow is important to him, and she’s important to me too. I just wish he would’ve listened because he’s not in any shape to run to the house. Yeah, it’s not far from here, but I worry about him especially since I’m staring at his shredded back. But it doesn’t seem to bother him right now. Every now and then I can see the pain lurking in his eyes, but I’m not sure if it’s because Cowie’s sick, or because he’s actually in pain. I feel my heart drop further into my stomach when he promises he’ll return to her. I just hope she can hold on long enough for us to get Maddy. I really hope Maddy can save her. My mind races as he forces himself to his feet once more. Kraygon is stubborn, and I know that he’ll go to the end of the world and back to save Cowie. He wasn’t here when Esme’s body returned. He wasn’t here when Patricia visited the district after her victory. He wasn’t here when Esme’s body was buried, but he’s making up for it all right now. Kraygon is strong, and for that I admire him, but he has to know his limits. He has to know that this could injure him worse. I watch as he staggers across the barn. I watch as he almost falls, and I know he’s going to need my help. I know he needs me to help get him to Maddy. But I’m not fast enough because he’s moving again. He’s past the barn door. Sighing to myself, I pat Cowie. ”It’s okay girl. It’ll be okay.” Using the side of the stall to help myself stand, I start chasing after him. My hand wraps around the lantern blowing the tiny flame out, and I close the door behind me, and it appears to be just in time because Kraygon is falling. He’s slowly collapsing towards the ground, and it takes every ounce of strength I have to make it to him in time. I thrust my arms out in front of me catching him right below the armpits. For a moment I can feel his pain. I can feel his body slowly catching against mine. If only he would listen. If only he would understand that I’m only looking out for his best interest. Yet he doesn’t see it that way. At least, he has the same Kraygon living inside whatever shell he’s in. Together we move towards the house, and he’s shouting for Maddy over and over, and I’m afraid he’s going to wake the neighbors if he’s not careful. But soon I join in with him. Shouting a few seconds after him because we need her. We need her right now more than ever. Relief flows through me the moment the lights turn on in the house. A small lantern sitting inside the window dances to life. It lets me know that someone is awake. And I watch as the door opens, and I’m pretty much dragging Kraygon closer and closer. I’m all smiles when I see Maddy standing outside the door in her nightgown holding the tiny lantern. And I can tell her words are full of concern, but she’s also wondering why we woke her up. Kraygon is having trouble, and I know he can’t do this much longer. The stress has to be bothering him right now. It has to be hurting him. It’s up to me. I am the one who has to tell her because I know that Kraygon isn’t okay, and we don’t have all night long because Cowie might not make it. I take a deep breath calming myself down before I finally speak. ”Maddy it’s Cowie. She’s collapsed.” A single tear slides down my face, and I can’t bring myself to finish the sentence, but for Esme I will be strong. I will carry on. ”I don’t know if she’ll make it.”

OOC notes go here To be continued Here