gravity. [sol's end]

[thompson harvard - d2b - arc]

Five. An innocent age, a pure mind. He’s always treasured the sunrise. He’d arise, dusted reddish-brown hair scattered on his face. He looked over at the window- the sun having just started to peek over the horizon. It was a beautiful sunrise, orange painting the sky along with the sky blue itself- it was a golden day. In the room next to him a small child would lay in a crib, wide awake as he. The young boy always liked to visit the next room and tell stories to the small child whenever he would cry; it always seemed to calm him down. And that’s what he did that morning, holding the small child in his little arms while staring out of the window that was in the infant’s room. He told stories about dragons and kingdoms- about people protecting their homes. Sol always liked home, it was a place where he felt at rest. The male had many stories to tell about homes, about places where people were always safe. Though, soon the infant fell asleep. Sol could easily watch Cal that entire day, watching his peaceful face as he slept. It was a beautiful thing to watch, for a small child was at rest. Calm, where nobody could hurt him. But that day he had plans, plans with his friend. He was going to play! Sol loved to play. He loved to run in fields and talk to Luna, run in fields and tell stories to Luna. He loved to do many things with her- because she was his queen. A knight must have his queen in order to do such things, and must always stay by her side. That day while out on the field, they made a promise. A pinkie promise to be exact, because this was a very serious promise that they must never betray. ”Sully, do you promise that you’ll stay by your queens side?” Luna stood tall and with the best posture, for a queen must always keep a good stance. That was an odd question, Sol let out a giggle. The answer was obvious! ”Of course I will, Luna! A knight must always protect his queen.” The girl furrowed her eyebrows together and placed her hands on her hips. ”Do you pinkie promise?” The male nodded enthusiastically. She put out her pinkie and he did his. Entangling them both around each other they both nodded with excitement similar to one of a child’s. ”Sir Sol, do you promise to serve your days to protecting your queen, Luna Shim, for your every last moment?” ”Yes.” It was a deal. -- this is part one.

[thompson harvard - d2b - arc]

Twelve. His knuckles gripped white, but cheeks burning red, blind to the fact that he hasn't left his bedroom for days. Here, locked away, he can dream his time away hoping that life isn't how it was before. All he can do is stare out of his window in prayer that this was all just some awful dream. One of those bad dreams, in the dead of night, where at such ungodly hours people would feel themselves falling. No platform to hold them, no solidified place or position. Just ​falling​, and when they were about to slam onto the ground they would instead slam awake from the nightmare. Like a game where the rules are constant. The only rule being that no nightmare may leave without seeming ​real. Ma' always said that she would come home soon, like it was all just some game. Luna was good at playing games, Ma' knew that, but when are these things ever a game? They used to run and play games in that field they spent most of their days in, they used to play games in the field because they felt no need to waste their life away. A jovial moral in life, a bright hope that they would both be safe. Somehow everyone would be okay. Though, a soulless slip of paper had made that thought all slowly fall away. Slowly fall into the shaking and trembling body that stands before the window. The glass panes that let him view the world outside, the world that was full of people that were so focused on keeping their own selves alive that they had to end another life. One life meant the survival of many, that was how things functioned here. Here. In this home, in this spot. Where home is hard to find in this story's setting. But, when found, it's as if the home had been there the entire trial of life. Knocking onto the walls of this home were the apologies people had attempted to voice, though the voices had all been programmed. They were inanimate, no life in the words that they spoke. The words were spoken as if they were from the soul; mother purges on the plead to get him out of his dusted room. (”Sully, please come out.”) And he would respond to those soul filled words as if the response had been practiced by a preacher with their bible. ”No.” He would never leave that room due to the mere fact that he would never see his queen again. The sun had risen to a day where a queen had fallen. It made him feel like a worthless knight to have the task of protecting such a royal being. A pure creature for every holder of the royal crown must be pure. Pure like the sunsets that his mother once told him about, the ones that he had been named after. Where the sun would set to see the moon rise, it was a complete cycle between the two names that made his life real. Luna and Sol, moon and sun, the queen and knight of the fields they used to roam. In his hands lay a crown made out of flowers for his queen. He had given her the crown two years ago while on that field making each other their own crowns. The crown was decorated with flowers of white, red, purple and blue. It was a plethora of colors that danced on that crown fit for a queen. He had given that crown to Luna in thought that every queen needed her crown. What was a queen without her crown? Not a queen, that’s for sure. Sol had stared down at the casket days ago that she had laid in. Envied it, settling into the fact that Luna had died. Her crown was placed on her head still with her body prettied up for whatever reason they thought was needed. Her clothing seemed to match the crown, a white shirt along with a multi colored skirt of the crown’s color. Reds, whites, purples and blues all danced and splashed on that skirt. He took the crown from her head, keeping it in his hands or on his head every day since. Because maybe, just maybe, someone else could take the throne in the future. -- still more to come lol

[thompson harvard - d2b - arc]

[presto][/presto]

s o l .

It was difficult, you know?

I thought that everything revolved around me ; the idea that at this point, nothing could defeat me, and at the same time, nobody could. But the world changed real damn quick.

After killing several people you begin to think you're invincible. Because after that point, when you're fighting for your life and could easily escape the devils grip. You've done it enough times that when thinking about killing it is easier done than said.

I guess that's where I went wrong, huh? I got too cocky and thought that I could be the best there ever was. In the most simple terms, I was a cold blooded killer. And I was proud of it. In that disgusting, gratified mind of mine, I was actually proud of killing 6 people, almost killing 2 more, and if I would have won; I'd likely have won with 6 kills.

In the world where everything went right and my life was a perfect slide; I'd have killed 7 people. I'd have become the most dangerous victor ever but with the most innocent of hearts. everyone by this point knew that I was a child at heart. That my golden view on life was all but a toy in their hands. I wasn't taken seriously. I was a joke.

Nobody would like a child dressed in blood now, would they?

My family would be disgusted. I doubt they'd want anything to do with me really. If I had to guess; they'd call me a liar. Hayk was used to the stories where violence wasn't how the kingdom was saved, but instead, it was through reason. They'd talk through it because that was the logical way of settling problems. Not taking whatever pride they owned and throwing it away to defend themselves.

My family would be faced with one new dilemma; who would they be disapproving of more? The girl who spoke to her grave or the boy who fought to his grave? The one who spoke so highly of being loyal. Of fairy tails that told and praised the ideas of making everything safe again. Where dragons got slain in order to protect their own home. I spoke of dragons being slain, where everyone would be saved and the slayer himself being acclaimed for his great work. And then they'd go back to every day life. Towns bustling and lungs fluctuating to whatever their hearts desire.

That's how I told the stories. And I'd picture myself as that warrior; saving the homes from being burnt to the ground. Save the families from split apart, make sure that everyone was safe okay. I told those stories like I was the warrior (and dear god, I believed it). That's what I thought that going into the Games was like. Slaying dragons to protect whatever family I had, because that was the point of them right?

False.

They were made to break you down, show the real you that nobody has seen before. Because when you're in a situation where death seems to be the only blanket that covers you at night; you're you. Purely you and only you. There's no idea of when you'll fall - if you'll fall, and there's no way you can have a mask of fake emotions the entire time. Killing people changes you. Forms you, shows you how easy someone's broken and it shows you how easily you're willing to break them.

And that forms the belief that you can break anyone. Even your friends.
Your family.

You begin to believe you're so [ strong ] and that killing is the most easiest task man could do. And by personal experience I could say it was. I killed three people. I could have killed three more (i'm glad i didn't). And due to your confidence, you believe that you could be yourself. What's the fun in murdering when you don't even know yourself? You feel robotic. Automatic, the only system known to you is murder. The constant shift between life and death, then one last blow to end it all.

I felt so strong on Day Seven. I felt like I was the king of the world, and nobody could stop me.
I was ready to join the norm that I have grown accustomed to; killing. It was a regular day to day constant.

Cecelia.
Amerika.
Noelia.

They all fall- no, that's not the right word.
They all fell because of me.

When I awoke on Day Seven, I expected to leave that day with the crown upon my head. victor embedded on it, though god knows that only after Day Seven four people remain. By that point, if I were to get there I believed that I had it in the bag.

I awoke to expect to see Danny Brooker or Kite Tide. Ezero Laffan or Celia Mortuus.
I expected to see my enemies, and not my family.

Maybe that's why I was so weak ; so ready to die. I couldn't possibly bear the thought of killing Atticus because he was my family. I was ready to keep fighting and avoid my family, even if it did mean us meeting up in the final four or two, making the pain more unbearable. I wanted all of us to have the biggest chance of going home because people like them deserved it.

I didn't deserve it. I don't deserve any of this ; my placing, my spot in this world.
Every warrior has his downfall, his last few prayers when a fight begun and he knew it was his end.

When I saw Atticus I knew that I couldn't do it. I couldn't kill him. After those nights where he lay on my shoulder (or, that what remained of it), I've grown attached. I can't kill the person that made me feel human in here, could I?

That's inhuman.
Well, I'm rather inhumane myself.

But for the last few moments of my life; I prayed to god that it was him that went home.
Not me.

Because I'm a killer.
A murderer.
A brother.
A disgrace.
A warrior.

And, the most important one,
I am heartless.

I say my prayers, call my blessings.

And to think that God doesn't exist, he came upon me as I requested.

I counted my last breaths.

one.

two..

three...

I fell out of the cage, a lifeless body.
A lifeless myth, gone yet again.

[ t h a n k you ]
rook ; you've been such an incredible person and mentor, and i'm so so glad that i had the opportunity of being reaped because i don't think i would know you as well due to that. you've been such a backbone for me throughout the 72nd and the 73rd and i appreciate you so so much for that. thank you for being there for me, because you're probably the best person for me when i need to rant. i can't express enough how much i appreciate you for being such a great friend.

when i say this, i mean it as an infinite THANK YOU.

Tom ; I'm not even gonna lie here, I love you. As a friend, as a person. You're SUCH a great person and I absolutely love you for being such a great friend to me all this time. You and Rook were the biggest backbones of my 72nd Games experience, and I cannot believe that I get to call you as a friend. Even though I've already given some sap story of a message to you last week, I have to thank you SO MUCH for being there for me. You don't know how much it means for me, because you're one of the closest people I have.

aya , ghosty , lance ; you guys made the experience ten times easier with you in our alliance chat. you had such a relaxed, friendly environment and it was so important for us to have people that can give us some breathing room from the games. you guys were it when we were all upset about something, and you made me feel better so easily. thank you, thank you,
THANKYOU for making this experience so easy.

swampwives (mat , Loony , ali ] ; oh my gOD i absolutely love you guys. you made my second games experience a beautiful one and i'm so glad that i got reaped. without that, i don't think i'd have the bonds with some of you that i have now. i'm so glad i get to call you my friends and you're such a close family to me, and i'm so proud of what we've done together <3. every single one of you are great people and this experience has been incredible to have with you guys.

gamemakers ( [nyte] Python ) ; this may be rather short, but thank you guys for hosting such an amazing games. i'm glad i get to say this is my first real games experience and you guys made it ten times better.

and, the best, all of you guys. i'm glad i get to call this place my home. even though the 72nd was definitely a bumpy road, i don't regret being able to talk to some of you all more and get a bit of a better connection with the site as a whole. i'm so thankful that i joined this community and i love you all so, so much <3.