light of my life, fire of my loins {arc}

[Lyn𝛿is]

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k a r l t e l l e r

Dolly, Dolly, Dolly. I can't stop thinking about her. It's hard to care about soap and chemistry and whatever useless shit the teacher is droning on about when I can think about the joy she brings me instead. She smiled that shy little smile of hers at me as we passed by each other between classes, so hopefully she'll be up for hanging out after school. It matches her face so well, like everything fitting into their proper places. I hate it when people's expressions and personality don't match their appearance; it makes them look ugly or fake, like that pervert. Perverts like him are the types of boys girls go for, though, and it's not just because of the recent victory of Justice Fray, whatever the fuck kind of name that is. But Dolly knows better than to be that sort of girl, I'm sure, and as long as I can interact with her there's nothing more I want. It's hard, though, when I have no idea what she thinks, and it's so hard to figure out what she's feeling. One day we'll have a close enough relationship that I don't have to worry about all this social bullshit. I may not care about what most people think of me, but I'm willing to do anything in order to not lose her, including playing the hard-to-get game in order to finally break down the walls she builds around herself and get her to open up to me. I'd like to believe I'm making progress on that front. The bell finally rings and makes the teacher shut up as people pack up their bags. I know which classroom Dolly has her last class, and I make a beeline for it, ignoring all the others in the halls. I'm fast enough that I'm waiting for her by the time she emerges from the door, thanks at least in part to her teacher Mr. "the bell doesn't dismiss you, I do". That's good - it means she won't forget about me and accidentally walk off by herself. I smile at her, my first genuine smile all day. "Would you be up for hanging out a bit in the square? It's fine if you're not, I can just walk you home."

arctic

[arctic]

dolly dwarryhouse

a | b | c

People always romanticize the idea of having a personal secret admirer. That it'd be so enchanting to wake up to a letter on your doorstep, or to go to school to find a bouquet of flowers shoved into face the moment you walk in. I've told people about it and all they would do is give a little gasp in awe. They'd swoon and then clasp their hands together like some christian bitch had told them they were getting a free ticket to heaven if so. I hate it with a burning passion, but the problem is nobody seems to understand what it feels like to get your life taken away because some dude with little to no life doesn't know the idea of privacy.

When the bell rang I wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. However I was unknown to time by this point. Lost in my thoughts and totally oblivious to the even idea that I was still in school. Moment turned into decade it seemed, me in my own world as I tried to cancel out the blabbering mind of the teacher. I was too scared, worried. I didn't like the idea of being followed everywhere I go. I was used to it though. By this point he'd been so addicted to the idea of me and what I am - if I even am anything. When the bell rang I rushed to start putting my things in my bag as fast as I could. My heart was pounding and it felt like my head would explode if I were to see him.

And if I see that man outside of this classroom, I'll make it my goal to bash his head in. I got my bag and started out. I caught a few breaths, not seeing any hint of him being there but of course the moment I step out, he's right there. Waiting for me. "Would you be up for hanging out a bit in the square? It's fine if you're not, I can just walk you home." He asked this, being casual like I actually liked the creep of a boy.

"I think my parents want me home soon." I lied to him, but it was the only way he'd get away from me soon if it were the case. I didn't trust myself walking home alone with him but I didn't want a sibling to walk with me, because they'd probably tease me.

They don't fucking know how scared I am.

But it's fine. If he so dares touches me, I'll make sure the next tennis ball I find I'm shoving up his ass. "Thank you, though." It was the biggest lie I've ever told, but I've grown used to lying to my enemies by this point.

With my family, how else are you supposed to win competition?