i dreamed a dream | { tobias/lenox } jb blitz
Oct 1, 2017 12:22:58 GMT -5
Post by D6f Carmen Cantelou [aza] on Oct 1, 2017 12:22:58 GMT -5
lenox lachance
Three years ago, I fell–inexplicably, completely and totally.
Three moments ago, I felt the same, only worse. Lined up, ready for slaughter, Seven’s brothers and sisters waited for the names to be read, for their lives to be deemed safe and for a stranger to be pulled from the square. It wasn’t like that for me; we were aligned, like stars, heads down and eyes pinpointed on the ground. I heard a voice, a whisper but I didn’t think anything of it.
And all of a sudden, the stars began to fall. A scramble to my right, I eyed the source of the commotion.
"Wrong!" The voice shouted, my stomach sank, my eyes widened and I felt like my knees were about to give – I knew the source, blood boiling at the boy that is my brother.
Tobias volunteered.
Tobias volunteered and is going to leave me, just like how it happened before. It isn’t like there was a goal to be accomplished, it isn’t like death is something to boast about, something to be proud of. I still feel like diving beneath the covers of my bed and crying myself to sleep as I drop into a spiral of decline.
Tobias’ hands are tied and he can’t catch me when I fall.
I step foot in the Justice Building but there is no such thing. There is no justice in taking someone who deserves the life ahead of them. Broken bones and broken noses are no prize, it’s only pain. It’s the type of pain that ripples from the arena through the Capitol, from the Capitol to Seven. I stand alone, mother watching over but never interfering. I suppose that I should be used to the aftershock that comes with having a brother with a death wish, but my heart’s fault line shifts and shakes. Ruptured, ugly, it is broken, again.
And I know that I should be optimistic for Tobias’ sake, but I can’t get my hopes up when they have so far to fall. I used to dream in colour but the fallout has washed everything with black and white. He’ll come back just like how it happened before; I’ll try to bury my head in the sand as he is laid to rest on a bed of roses, as he drowns in Seven’s disappointment and floats to the surface only to be swallowed by petty love songs, reassurances and lullabies.
I look at him and I see him slipping already. I’m beginning to think that loving a LaChance is like holding the sun and hoping I don’t get burnt.
But even knowing that, I can’t help myself. I pull him close and hug him, holding him tighter than I’ve ever held him before.
"Why did you do it?" I sigh, I don’t know how much more my heart can take. "I'm begging you, please come home."{ table: zoë }
but the tigers come at night
with their voices soft as thunder