the princess diaries ii ♔ diana

[D6f Carmen Cantelou [aza]]

Dear sponsor,

I took a picture of the sky. Burnt free of clouds, it was endless, timeless, but had an energy that transcended its beauty. There was poison thick in the air, and though I couldn't see it—no one could see it—I could feel it. A pressure that plumed from up above and slowly made its way into our bodies; I took a picture of the sky because I wanted to capture the moment so, if there is a next time, I can be prepared.

Whatever was up above, whatever was there—it took Zion. The only person in this arena who I could rely on, the only person who reminded me of home. He was a good friend: protective but offensive too, he was sure that I wouldn't get hurt and that I'd make it out alive. Even when the snake was swallowing the light in his eyes, he called my name, Diana, a rock thrown at my glass and it broke me.

It was only for a second or two, but it broke me. I felt it. I felt it in my chest—my heart slowing down to fall in line with the rhythm of my blinking, the heat in my body escaping like it had been held captive in my skin, and so I felt ice up and down my spine. Frost spiking out like wings on my back but they did not let me fly, they paralysed me, they forced me to stay grounded and stare as Zion lost hope, as Zion lost touch.

One pained and one paralysed—I'm sure Seven were watching with their own heavy hearts.

I wish that we could've pulled him from that creature, even if it had already killed him. To die in such a way that extinguishes the fire in your stomach as if it was lit to burn out... it's sad, it isn't how I'd want to go. I believe that you should never sacrifice your dignity, not even for death. No matter how big or small the concession, it is a loss of the honour a person has earned and deserved through their life. If only we could've taken a moment to pay due respects, perhaps that would ensure Zion had died as happily as he had lived.

The creature that stood in the way of that were unlike anything I had ever seen before. You see the muttations all the time in the games, but only through a screen, and to see them in the flesh tells a much darker story than a camera. The stallion was the epitome of darkness; every nightmare and bad dream knitted into a beautiful body so that it masked the damage it could do. The illusion would only fool me once, but to be a fool once is to be a fool more times than necessary.

Berlin had a brush with death because of his broken bones; his wounds looked worse than the injuries we had yesterday. I felt like it was a race against time to act to heal him, to reverse some of the hurt and start stitching his heart back into his chest. People say that careers do not have hearts, people make an assumption that they are all the same—but everyone has the same value. Everyone has the potential to give something back, to show that we can care for one another, and in the process, care for ourselves.

Kindness comes around. I can be safe in the knowledge that if the time ever comes to it, Berlin, or Hisidro, will care for me as I have cared for them.

We have not only each other to care about now, but our horses too. Berlin led that adventure with sheer determination that it made me almost forget the state he was in minutes before; I admire that strength. He saw the silhouette of the same thing that forced him to the floor, but got up and stood in the same path that almost got him killed. The beating of hooves against the ground like a clock ticking against us, yet it did not strike half as hard as Berlin's bravery.

The horses were not as lethal, nor as deadly, but they are the same creature, likely with the same blood. To stare past defeat in the eye is a personal victory, and I hope that Berlin thinks the same and isn't caught up in his hurt.

I believe that those horses came to us because life is an echo. The world had just taken Zion and was responsive, it was reflective in its actions and tried to make amends. The company of a human from home would never be replaced; there is a home-sized hole in my heart and no horse can be pushed into it without compromising their beauty.

A hole in the heart is fine by me—it lets more light in. I have realise that that is crucial when faced with the darkness, and I am certain it will make sure I do not lose sight of my cause and intentions, it will guide me towards the love that I lead with.


Today has made me realise exactly what I signed up for. To save Lenox Lachance was to sacrifice myself, but putting my life on the line in love's name is the best thing I could ever do. And even if the things I see here—the death of a friend, the falling of a career—are not sweet, they remind me of the reason I'm here in the first place. I am here to be a champion, to be a queen in people's hearts.

Seven watches only me now. I remember Seven's only hope lying in despair, but now it lies in me. It's a weird thought, to think that you are carrying the weight of an entire district—but it doesn't feel like a weight at all. It is a pleasure to carry them.

A princess did not become a queen overnight, it would be a process, just like every other thing in the world. It would not be simple, and though it may break her first, it would still make her.

Just like the sky makes the stars, no matter what is in the air—it would make me.