planting the seed // cato

[k!ah]

l i l i t h .

Lips pulled back into that smile that only painted the surface, I make my way through a small down in district Eleven. In my hands I carry a basket, hand weaved, filled strawberry jam, made all from hand. My mother, before she had fallen ill, had taught me the art to jam making. It had been a passion of hers, and whilst I never had much money, when I managed to find a little extra I liked to spend it on buying ingredients for home made delicacies, such as the tartly sweet jam in my basket.

A old couple wave in my direction, smiles shining brightly on their ageing faces. It was strange, walking down the street, people going about their normal day to day routine, when the last tribute from district Eleven had only fallen a day ago. It was expected, that she perished. She was only a small girl, unfairly pitted against a career from district One. I had watched as she died, as the knife paired her heart and her life and bleed into the dirt of the catacombs. I wander what her family must be feeling, if she had any.

Shaking my head I nod at the couple, turning to head down a narrow path that would lead me to a small home nestled to the outer edge of large expansive fields. The residence for my cousin Drogon. Yesterday when I had run into him he had seemed off. For a man of so little words his lack of conversation had planted a small seed of worry in the back of my mind.

The path is unsteady, loose rocks under foot as it veers to the left, the sounds of the town disappearing replaced by the gentle hum of crickets. Cursing, my foot slips on a lose rock, sending my knees crashing to the ground. My basket hits heard, a far of the jam escaping, cracks climbing the edge of the glass. "For fucks sake, Drogon! Why do you have to be so bloody isolated." Grumbling I scramble for the far, hastily shoving back into the weaved basket.

Taking a deep breath I recompose myself, dusting off the dirt from my skirt, ignoring the small needs of blood that been to form on my skinned knee. An issue for later.

Teaching the end of the walk way my fist knocks persistently on Drogons door. "Hey, Drogon! I brought you some home-made jam!" I yell into the wooden door, knocking impatiently. "Let me in and I'll butter up some bread."

[Cato]

Drogon Rhodes

It's still painful, and all I can do is try to make the best of the hand life has given me, but all I want to do is stay locked away in my home. Sometimes living far away from people makes life easier. Family rarely stops by, and it just makes things better. I didn't know Arabella very long, but it felt so much longer than that. Even when I'm out in the district trying to do some shopping or just getting some fresh air, I don't want to talk to anyone. Especially when I see family. I just want them to leave me alone and let me be. Wasn't too long ago I ran into Lilith, and I tried to keep things short and sweet, but I'm not sure how it actually worked.

Today I'm just sitting here. The house is a mess. A few clothes strung about, dishes piled up on the counter. Finding motivation to even clean them is tough, but I know I need to. It didn't even feel this way losing family, maybe it's because I was so young that I didn't truly understand what was happening. I just know that this is a first. The heartbreak. The sorrow. All of it, and I just want to do nothing as the days keep passing me by. I have food to last since it's hard to even eat, but I'm still trying. It's a chore just trying to get from my bed to the couch which is why I sleep on the couch right now. It's easier that way.

So when I hear a knock on the door, I simply try to ignore it hoping whoever is outside will just go away and leave me alone. It's all I can ask for right now. Only the knocking doesn't stop, and whoever is outside doesn't go away. That's when I hear the voice of my cousin echoing through the door. At first I don't want to let her in because I don't want her to see the mess, but when she mentions having jam, I can't really resist anymore. "Okay, okay I'm coming!" I call out hoping she'll give me a moment and stop pounding on the door.

I sigh and quickly throw the clothes in my room, and then I close the door. I can't hide the dishes, but I'll just tell her I had guests over if she asks, and that I haven't gotten around to cleaning them yet. I put a smile on my face, and when I make it to the door, I carefully let her inside. I offer a slight grin, but I'm not sure if it's enough. "What kind of jam did you make?" I ask trying to see what's inside. I just want to be alone, but I'll act like I'm content since it's the least I can do.

District Eleven

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[k!ah]

l i l i t h .

"Drogon! Open the bloody-"

"-I'm coming!" Patience wasn't a virtue that I seemed to possess because even after his response I find my fist nocking again the wood of his door. Persistent and, quite frankly, annoying. "What's taking so damn long," I mumble under my breathe as I sneak over to a window to peak in.

I watch as he moves around the room picking up dirty clothes, trying to tidy the dark messy house. It's not until he moves towards the door that I see his face. I feel my heart stop momentarily as I watch as he forces himself to smile, trying to hide the pain and grief that lingers. What had happened? Why was he such a mess? Frowning I quickly move from the window, my own forced smile slipped onto my lips (years of practice making it almost flawless.)

The door creaks open and I quickly shove my way past him, "take ya time, why don't you." He asks me about the jam and I'm about to respond but before I can my eyes are drawn to the stacks of dirty dishes, and pile of rubbish in the kitchen. I feel my tongue click as I place the basket down, worry being to crease my brow as my eyes drift back to my cousin. "Dragon..." my voice trails off, as I take in the whole room. Something was defiantly off. What's wrong? I want to ask, but I knew the moment I begin to pester he would shut down, push me away.

So instead of nagging at him, I move around the room, opening the curtains and pulling up the sleeves of my cardigan. "It's so dark in here!" I exclaim, my feet creaking over old floor boards. "In the basket is a few jars of strawberry jam. It's quite delicious, if I do say so myself. Get out some bread, I'll cut it up." I move to the kitchen, quickly filling the basin with hot, soapy water.

"Get out the butter and I'll start on some of these dishes!" I move to grab the first dish, my eyes seeking out Drogon's. "Maybe you could make me a cup of tea and we could catch up? It's been too long."

[Cato]

Drogon Rhodes

It's hard letting someone in and seeing this place, but I couldn't keep her waiting. Lilith is my cousin, and I want what's best for her, and I know she wants what's best for me. I'm just ashamed to let her see how awful I've let this place get. Just letting it get this bad was a disaster, but I haven't had the motivation to even get myself out of bed to do anything. Let alone clean the place up, and I'm happy she seems so understanding. Yet I see her look around, and I feel so disgusted, and I simply want to apologize. I don't get a chance though because she's moving around opening the curtains to let the light in, and it hurts my eyes for just a bit. I've lived in the dark so long. It hurts my eyes, but I don't even care.

Before I can speak she says she has jar of strawberry jam, and I feel my stomach rumbling. The sound of it sounds amazing, and I want to eat it. She asks me to grab the bread, so I rummage around carefully trying to find it, then I grab the butter out of the refrigerator, and I watch as she starts on the dishes. I want to help her. I don't want her to feel like she has to do this because she doesn't. I'm perfectly capable of caring for myself. I just needed some time. When she asks for a cup of tea, I head over to the cabinet and grab a tiny clean cup before grabbing everything else that's needed. It's been a while since I've made tea, but I'll try. I'll do the best I can. For her. She's helping me, so the least I can do is help her.

I still don't say a word. I sit at the table and just listen to the sound of water. It's been a while, life is tough. Losing a friend has broken me, and I don't want to catch up with anyone. All I want is time alone. To be by myself and mourn. I'm tired of people thinking catching up is such a good idea because what can I say? I've never lost a friend before. Yet I place a smile on my face because I know she wants me to. I take a spoon and grab some jam, and I don't even put it on my plate. I simply take a taste, and it's all so wonderful. It tastes amazing, and I want to eat it all. I really do. Yet I can't bring myself to. Maybe we can share it. Even the light helps some, so maybe Lilith can truly light up my day.

District Eleven

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