It's Hard Sometimes, Being Humankind [Vanya's End]

[djed carnelian . d8m [kap]]

☆

"I don't belong here
Not in this atmosphere
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye"

~

Protect them. Protect them. Protect them. You are not important.

That's how it started in the arena. She wasn't there to survive or protect herself. She was there to protect the other that had come there with her. Vanya McAlister was meant to be the savior of others, not the savior of herself.

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Protect yourself.

The first time that she was struck by the beasts that the Capitol had released into the arena, she actually felt the need to protect herself, for the first time in her life. When the crying girl came up to her, however, having just lost her friends, Vanya knew that she couldn't focus on protecting herself any longer. That wasn't why she was here, after all. She was meant to protect the others.

Save the girl. Save the girl. Save the girl. She is important.

Vanya told the girl to stay behind her and approached the bear with her sword. She was going to try to avenge the death of this girl's friends. That's what she'd needed to do. She'd never killed anything in her life before, but now was the time. She cut into the bear's leg and it collapsed. It was dead. She'd done what she was meant to.

Make sure she's okay. Make sure she's okay. Make sure she's okay. Protect her.

Then, Vanya turned to look at the girl. Before she could say anything, though, she felt pain in the side of her head. Something had cut her ear completely off, and Vanya screamed in response. Not even a full second later, the oversized bird she'd been fighting before struck her leg, cutting deep into it in the same spot, twice in a row. Vanya collapsed. She knew then that this bird was finishing her off in the same way she'd killed the bear.

You're dying. You're dying. You're dying. This is the end.

The girl from Nine was dying. This was the end of her life, and while sure, she wished she could have survived all of this, she knew it wasn't her place. She was here to protect the other tributes, and she had done just that. By taking down the bear and keeping the girl she was trying to protect behind her while she was attacked by the other creatures, she might have spared her life, at least for a little bit longer. Vanya was dying, but maybe this other girl would live on.

It's over. It's over. It's over. You're dead.

"My name is... Vanya..." Vanya managed to mutter in the other girl's direction as death took over. Whether or not the girl heard her, it didn't matter. It was all over now.

Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.

~

lyrics: "Human Race" by Three Days Grace