girl, where do you think you're going | dunn sisters.

[fireflyz]

She knew who was at her door without looking up. She never had to ask, merely had to slide her eyes up from her book and be comforted by the sight of her sister sprawled out across her feet. But there was no shift in the mattress beneath her, no head of sandy hair whipping around in her peripheral vision.

She glanced up. "Hi-ward," she greeted, making the same play on words she always did. Her sister braced her shoulder against the doorframe, eyes vacant.

"What's this Ryland is saying about you leaving?" Hayward said coolly, and Angelique hummed in understanding.

"I'm going on the district exchange program," she said, sliding a thin sheet of paper between the pages of her book and setting it on the bed next to her. A pregnant pause filled the room, swelling with the words that Hayward probably meant to say but wouldn't, because she wanted to protect Angelique from whatever was going on in that head of hers.

Angelique tapped her foot against the comforter. "Get over here. What are you thinking?"

Hayward detached herself from the wall, sidling to the edge of Angelique's bed. "I'm thinking about you leaving," she answered. "Angie. What the hell?"

"It's only for the school year," Angelique said gently, her eyes steeling when Hayward gave her an incredulous stare in return. "Hey. Don't look at me like that, you know how badly I wanted this."

Hayward rotated her head so that she was facing the wall instead, and she shrugged. "Sorry, I just didn't know you wanted to leave Seven that bad," she grumbled, picking at her nails.

"It's not about leaving Seven," Angelique protested, sitting up and pushing herself onto her stomach. "It's about getting the best education I can get."

"Well, pardon me, Miss Augustine-"

"Stop. You know that's not my name."

Her sister craned to meet her gaze, eyes always ablaze but for Angelique more sun than wildfire. "It's your blood, isn't it?"

Angelique tightened her jaw, eyes falling to the floor. They had had this conversation thousands of times over the years, and yet remained lightyears away from a resolution. It always followed the same path - she had the picturesque life where everything made sense - Angelique Augustine, born into greatness - and Hayward was the bastard child who didn't know who she was, although Angelique would argue that being raised by their grandparents hardly made her sister a bastard. She hadn't been there when Hayward went to meet the others who claimed to be her siblings, nor had she even known that her sister had gone searching in the first place, but she figured having them had to mean something too. Hayward wasn't alone in the slightest, and Angelique alone could make certain of that. There was a reason their mother had given them the same last name.

"Believe it or not, my dad has nothing to do with me going away," she said, resting her chin in the crook of her palm. "You're always saying how nothing happens around here. Why not go where things happen?"

Hayward's next words were soft. "Where are you going?"

"To Eight!" Angelique declared, clapping her hands. "Isn't it exciting?"

"I mean, I don't really know what happens in Eight. What am I excited about?"

Angelique rolled onto her side, lips parted and eyebrows knitted together. "The wooooonderful woooorld of textile engineering!" she said in her best announcer's voice, dramatically throwing an arm into the air. "The science of how they make jacquard, and leather, and polyester, and the cotton shirt on your back."

"I mean-" Hayward tugged at her collar. "I'm pretty sure cotton shirts are only made of cotton."

"Or are they?" Angelique prodded, getting up from the bed. She extended her arms towards Hayward, opening and closing her fingers. Her sister reached forward and grasped her hands, but she did not rise from where she sat.

"C'mon, this is a good thing. I'll have so many stories to tell when I get home for the summer," Angelique pleaded. Hayward squeezed her fingers before allowing her own hands to fall back into her lap.

"Ang, what am I supposed to do without you for a whole year?" Hayward said sullenly. "I'll be all by myself."

"You won't be," Angelique insisted. "You'll have nan and gramps. And mom."

"I don't want to talk to Leila."

Angelique swallowed. She really should've seen this coming, but she could only do so much to maintain her sister's temperament. "I'm not the eldest here, Wayward. You've got to learn to manage without me."

The older girl did not speak, slowly blowing air through her cheeks. "Fine."

Angelique gave a small grin, throwing her arms around Hayward's shoulders. "I'll be back before you know it."

[fireflyz]

Each passing day felt like ten years had gone by. Minutes constantly stretched into hours, yet was like her life was passing her by quicker than she could anticipate. Hayward was anxious. That much she knew. But the exact cause was still out of her grasp, no matter how often she felt around for signs.

She didn't want Angelique to go, but the fact of the matter was that she was going, and she couldn't stop her. Her sister had always dreamt about the world beyond the fences of Seven and Hayward had only ever thought of what it felt like to be trapped inside of them. What was it like to know where you were headed in life even when the weight of the world hung over you?

What was it like to be someone? Someone that people valued for merely existing, not only because of the use they served, not because of what they could hypothetically become. She thought of her half-siblings, the whole lot of them, how she'd brushed them off because Angelique was the only sister that mattered. Now her only sister was gone off to District Eight, the unbreakable tether between the two of them finally snapped. Hayward wanted to be someone worth greeting, someone worth saying goodbye to.

Angelique would probably have a going away party, and she would deserve it. If Hayward were gone, would she even get a send off, or a wake hosted by people she had never met like Hanaa Darton?

Hayward's crisis extended beyond her family, and whether or not Angelique was around to be the buffer for conflicts between her and Leila and Ryland. Hell, they called her Wayward for a reason - even Angie had adopted it after promising for years that she wouldn't. Hayward had no clue how to exist beyond the hole she had dug herself into, nor how to find the right words to explain this.