r a g e and pain [opal oneshot

[cass]

I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything
You held me down, but I got up
Already brushing off the dust
You hear my voice, you hear that sound
Like thunder gonna shake the ground

She was a failure.

Her first two tributes in the games and one was dead. Granted she hadn’t really expected the over-excited, enthusiastic, back flipping idiot to last very long. She’d met him doing stupid cartwheels over the ground and that really was not a good impression. And he had chosen horrid allies, one of them had backstabbed them, killing off a young girl just after the bloodbath and then that same ally had finished off Darren Dublin. She’d sat shaking her head as his canon had fired. There’d been no pity, upset or sadness, only a flicker of annoyance and expectance. She had, after all, expected it. The kid that had killed him off had more skill with a weapon then the “career” had, it turns out he seemed to be only good for those stupid cartwheels and flips. He could have paid more attention in training. Maybe he’d still be alive. She’d snorted at the idea, doubting it the whole time whilst she watched the boy’s body be picked up and carried away. There’d been no doubt in her mind that he wasn’t coming home and then Emery had openly said she wanted to die.

That was why earlier today Opal had punched a wall, splitting the skin, sending a flow of crimson droplets down her hand and wrist. As she drew it away she could feel the way her hand ached and she knew she’d broken a bone or two. But I had released the anger that had steadily grown within her gut as she had watched that child fight. Not once had she sat back and wanted that girl to win her fights, every time an enemy struck at her she had secretly hoped they would strike true and kill her. It wasn’t Opal being a bitch, it wasn’t her being heartless and cruel, it was simply her being her. There was no reason for Emery to still be alive, there was no reason for a girl that wanted to die to be the reason so many were being wounded. The only reason it was happening was because Emery Moreno was a coward. She was a selfish little prick. And Opal could think of a thousand different words to describe her and she had thought of them all. If she could she would have killed the girl herself, ending her existence before she could step foot into that arena. It would have been a kindness, saving her the pain of a slow and agonising death. It would have helped the other tributes as well.

Except that lying twisted girl had lied right to Opal’s face. She had basically screamed out the fact that she didn’t want to come home. That she wanted to die and never see the world outside of the arena again. Anyone as suicidal and disgusting as that should just step off the plate early and be done with it. But no. Not sweet, darling Emery. No. Instead she become a disgusting monster. She turned into something Opal began to despise as the first gong rang out, signalling the beginning of the games. It was sickening to watch a child that wanted no life injure and kill people that wanted nothing more to live. It was cold, ruthless and revolting. It made Opal want to yell, it made Opal want to send down a parachute and chuck some poisonous mutt in it to kill her nice and slowly. There was nothing right about it. There was nothing charming or real about it. It was just a girl that wanted to kill before she was killed. It was shaming to watch as a someone who despised life so greatly snatch it from the hands of another – someone who wanted it so much, someone who only struck another human being simply because they wanted to return home and see their family again.

Opal hated Emery Moreno.

She was a selfish, pretentious snot nosed little shit that had Opal bubbling with fury every time she glanced at the screen. Darren was already dead and she didn’t care. She couldn’t muster up enough energy to care that the boy was dead. All she felt was failure, all she felt was the need to go lie in bed, wrap a blanket around herself and slowly fall into a slumber as she cried. Not only was one of her tributes dead, but now she was stuck with a monster – a psychopath that needed to just be killed. Her first games as a mentor and they were already almost over. Opal Shore couldn’t give to shits about Emery Moreno, more so she would have watched, gladly if the girl had of been knocked out in the first five minutes of the games. She was repulsive, inconsiderate and very unlikeable. There was nothing about her that made Opal think that this was a girl that deserved anyone’s respect, whatsoever. And even though she had had little more than a single conversation with the rude child Opal felt like she knew the little brat well enough to know she deserved a beating and a half.

Hell Opal had screamed in fury as Hope had been killed. She’d stood up, her feet pounding the ground, arms locked rigidly by her sides. Face a twisted mask of rage. She’d liked Hope, she’d thought Hope was incredible, she’d wanted Hope to win; she’d wanted Hope She’d wanted to kick her TV in, to run around throwing things and destroying the fragile vase, lamps and items in her room. Words could not begin to describe how much she wanted to throttle the pathetic excuse for a girl. Emery Moreno was selfish; she was a liar and a bitch.

”UGHHHHHHHH.” She pressed her bleeding hands against the wall. Hair falling around her shoulders and face. Her chest heaved, and her heart hammered rapidly in her chest. Breathing heavily she stayed still, eyes planted on the ground. She hated this world. She hated it so so much. Why had she agreed to this all? Why had she won those stupid games? For once her mind could scramble up no answer, for once there was nothing there, but hollow despair. Spinning around she plants her back against the wall, before sliding downwards. Wrapping her arms tightly around her knees she buries her head in her lap. She wanted to cry. She wanted to just cry. But nothing would come out. She wanted to get angry some more and throw things everywhere. But it had all fled her. Her room was a mess, there was glass, ceramics, paper and everything scattered over the floor.

Now she was just empty. Empty and very much lost. There was a loud knock on her door, but Opal remained where she was, head buried in her lap, arms wound tightly around her body, trying desperately to feel something other then nothing.

You held me down, but I got up
Get ready cause I’ve had enough
I see it all, I see it now
I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire
Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me roar

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